Brother borrowed 20k without consent

RuthnJasper

NANANINANOONOO wrote: »

Well the news we had been dreading has arrived and there is not enough to proceed. The police are extremely appologetic and have assured dad it is not that they do not believe him.

My poor father is absolutely devastated, he is totally distraught and thinks this MUST mean that everybody believes my brother and not him :0(

I have no words...

Oh sweetie, I am more sorry than I can say. I'd be tempted to offer the full story to the local newspapers; let your brother take action on the printed assertions if he can prove that he didn't do it. Or make a film on your mobile or camera of your dad explaining exactly what effects your brother's actions have had on him (and you) and send it to your brother... It's not unexpected, as you say, but devastating all the same.

One thing to remember, however, is that (should life proceed naturally) your brother will one day be elderly and vulnerable and left to the mercy of his own children. If they "look up to" their father's example, then he stands to be a very lonely old man.

I WISH there was something I could do.

Maybe a 'farewell' letter from you to your brother explaining (not ranting or swearing) how you feel for yourself and how your father feels, the emotional despair your brother has caused, sent by recorded delivery, may be one way to try and get some of the mental anguish out (though your brother is probably too soul-less to reply)?

Has anyone referred you to http://www.elderabuse.org.uk/?

They - and http://www.ageuk.org.uk/cymru/health--wellbeing/relationships-and-family/elder-abuse/ - they may be able to offer advice on next steps or, importantly, counselling/support to help your father to understand that this was not his fault and that people DO believe him.

Please do feel free to PM me if there is anything I can do to help. xx

ryecatcher_2

So sorry to hear your news NANANINANOONOO, what a sucky ending to an awful time. I hope you and your father can support each other as best you can. I really feel for you both.

lemonpopsicle

What dreadful news, I'm quite frankly speechless.

dinosaur7

My heart goes out to you and your poor Dad. Unfortunately, it seems to be the case that the last people you can safely trust when it comes to money are close relatives. Sad but true.

Were the police considering a prosecution for fraud or for theft? I only ask because there is a leading theft case (R v Hinks) that may be of assistance to you. Essentially the case established that there can be a theft even if the property obtained amounts to a valid gift under the civil law. The thing that makes it theft is the presence of dishonesty accompanying the 'appropriation' of the property. This means that there could be a case of theft even if you cannot prove any fraudulent false representation, such as a forged signature. Also 'borrowing' is, in some circumstances, deemed to be an 'intention to permanently deprive'. If you are considering a private prosecution it might be worth getting a specialist to consider these points.

Just one last thought. My elderly mother used to ask me to deal with some of her finances and I always insisted that she kept copies of any transactions and showed them to my brother. At one point she offered to sign over full authority to me to deal with her accounts, but I refused to do so unless she had independent legal advice (without me present) and fully discussed the situation with my brother. There are so many cases of people abusing this sort of situation (or sometimes being unjustly suspected of abusing their position) that it makes sense to ensure that everyone involved can see what is going on as it does limit the possibility of fraud.

dinosaur7

One further thought. It might be worth checking out the bar pro bono unit to see if there is a chance of finding an up-and-coming barrister who might take on a private prosecution unpaid. I'm sorry I can't post links, but the address is barprobonodotorgdotuk - if that makes sense!

patanne

I was so sorry to read your news from the police. You are now free however to contact your brother and, very politely of course, tell him what an absolute idiot he is (that is the polite version of what I for one would like to say)! Do try and keep it polite even though it may be difficult. We don't want you back on here asking how to avoid harassment charges.

NANANINANOONOO

patanne wrote: »

I was so sorry to read your news from the police. You are now free however to contact your brother and, very politely of course, tell him what an absolute idiot he is (that is the polite version of what I for one would like to say)! Do try and keep it polite even though it may be difficult. We don't want you back on here asking how to avoid harassment charges.

Mmmmmmmmm

Brenny

Really, really sorry.

Maybe, if none of the other suggestions work, you could just email links to this thread to family members, keeping any extra words dispassionate. Then, at least, they will be able to read the whole, awful story, and can form their own opinions without others trying to influence them.

Take care.

lemonpopsicle

Do have a look at the bar pro bono unit NANANINANOONOO, it makes interesting reading and they may be able to help. XX
http://barprobono.org.uk/

NANANINANOONOO

dinosaur7 wrote: »

One further thought. It might be worth checking out the bar pro bono unit to see if there is a chance of finding an up-and-coming barrister who might take on a private prosecution unpaid. I'm sorry I can't post links, but the address is barprobonodotorgdotuk - if that makes sense!

Thank you for this info...I had never heard of pro bono unit...have checked out the site and will tell dad, it def looks like something worth exploring further depending where he wants to go with things. x