im back but no further on!

amani_2

how are you today HM? how is the strike going? thats awful that he wont help even with child care, yet he pays his ex for his son WHY? What is the difference they are both his children. If thats the reason for not giving you house keeping because you work, I would pack work in and stay at home and look after DD. Whats he going to do then????


AMANI XXX

Shineyhappy

Oh HM!

He sounds like a complete tightwad!

Do you have family living nearby whom you could visit to get a break from his miserly ways? I would get hold of a copy of Scrooge and give it to him and make sarky comments!

My OH (of 6 months) who isnt in debt and is on 36k (so a fair bit more than me) pays for everything as he knows how skint I am. He said that I am saving him money as I dont want loads of takeaways or meals out and have taught him a little of my frugal ways! I would show your OH the posts you have made on here and see what he says.

I hope you are properly going on strike in every room in the house?

*walks off wandering if that was tactfully put;) *

ftbworried

Where does his money go?

hannahsmummy1

Right, i dug out his bank statements so i can see where ALL his money goes! He does pay for EVERYTHING, all bills, mortage, BUT he pays nothing towards our daughter or anything for housekeeping.

Salary: 2707

OUTGOINGS: TV licence: 11.37
Mortage: 822.62
Mortage overpayment: 255.50
Insurance: 6.56
Insurance: 21.14
Water:12.79
Council Tax:127.45
Waste Water:22.76
Mobile: (his) 30
Mobile: (mine) 21
Payment shield:23.33
Son: 275
Gas service:17.50
Gas: 53
Electric:38
sky: 43.50
Car Insurance:30.31
BT Phone: 14.91
Virgin media (internet) 31.48

Total outgoings: 1858.22

Bank account balance as of 19 May 21,859.86

So thats his SOA he is quite happily sitting on a pile of money, quite happily watching me struggle, i told his this isnt a marriage its a jail sentence.

Ytaya

hannahsmummy1 wrote: »

But for the record he will NOT be getting dinner tonight nor will he be getting any washing/ironing done i am officially on STRIKE as far as he is concerned!

Good for you! If he's so insistent that you pay for everything you do or use, maybe you should apply the same for him. Tell him you will do his laundry and cook his meals... if he pays you to do so. If you buy the food, he has to buy it off you. If you cook it, he must pay you to do so. If he wants his shirts washed and ironed, he must pay for the Persil and pay for your time. Go on strike and give him an invoice for the last month's services! Tell him no more until he pays!

hannahsmummy1

just makes me even madder to know that some of that money could pay my debts off (even if he wanted to use it as a form of interest free loan which i would pay him back) and he would still be cushy- i told him if i even won the lottery he would not get one penny of it. LOL!

smudgemanc26

Good for you! Looking at his SOA i cant believe he gives his son £275 a month yet you dont get a penny and he lives with you and you raise his daughter!

I just dont understand why he would want all that money in his bank when you are struggling with debts, he's probably got a fantastic credit rating whilst you have to scrimp and save to pay for things for both of you. I just cant get my head around it.

If i had a chance of helping someone i loved and had the money to do so i'd would do it like theres no tomorrow. After all you are married and should share whats yours is his and whats his is yours should be the case.

Im not married yet and i hope when i do get married (if) that i find someone who would want to be equal in our relationship.

hannahsmummy1

i cant see us being married for a long time to tell you all the truth- i feel like a second rate citizen and its not good for me or my daughter who i believe is suffering because of all the negativity i feel towards her father. If i left him i would be better off all round- definately better off financially, and its something i have thought about a LOT over the past few weeks. I too would gladly give my last crust of bread and my last penny to anyone i loved and i wouldnt think twice about doing it either- buts that me to a T- and i let people walk all over with me- the same happens at work!

tigzem

Hi great to hear from you, was wondering how you were?

Glad your DD had a nice birthday.

Did you get my PM I sent ages ago?

Really sorry things not looking good with your OH.... xx

hannahsmummy1

sorry about not replying tigzem! I dont know if i can work things out with him, as at the moment i just feel bitter towards him. I want to make the whole thing work but he's not even given me an inch of anything. The only good thing that will come out of this is that i can hold my head up and say i paid off the debts myself! I have things to look forward to for when ive paid everything off! Thanks for all lovely messages- knew i could count on all you guys for support!!! xxx