Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

cazmanian_minx

Don't know if this will help, but my brother and his partner had a slightly similar dilemma - they both went to good private schools, but all the other children in their daughter's year were going on to the village school and if they'd started her in private school at whatever age it was, she'd have been going there without any friends in her year group.

So she went to the village school with all her mates, all was well for about a year, but because she's very, very bright she started getting bored and playing up. At that point, they took her for a taster day at the private school they'd chosen and she loved it so much she was begging to go. She started there a couple of years ago, aged 7 or 8, and is absolutely thriving there, something that might not have happened if she'd not had the input into the decision.

AlexLK

Debsnewbudget wrote: »

Hi Alex
Why not turn the thought process on its head
I don't think one school will provide everything, so what I would suggest is to make a list of what each school is missing and then work out how you can fill the gaps.
So for example if the local school does not offer music or languages can you arrange to get that provided?
If the prep school does not offer the local friends, are there other clubs etc where he can make local friends
Good luck
Debra

Thank you, this is a brilliant suggestion, why I hadn't thought of it I don't know. A case of "can't see the wood for the trees", I think.

cazmanian_minx wrote: »

Don't know if this will help, but my brother and his partner had a slightly similar dilemma - they both went to good private schools, but all the other children in their daughter's year were going on to the village school and if they'd started her in private school at whatever age it was, she'd have been going there without any friends in her year group.

So she went to the village school with all her mates, all was well for about a year, but because she's very, very bright she started getting bored and playing up. At that point, they took her for a taster day at the private school they'd chosen and she loved it so much she was begging to go. She started there a couple of years ago, aged 7 or 8, and is absolutely thriving there, something that might not have happened if she'd not had the input into the decision.

My son sometimes struggles a bit with being around lots of other children at nursery. I'm likely to be the only one to say this but the class sizes at prep school are much bigger than those at our village school. There is also a large focus on team activities at prep school which I'm not convinced he will particularly enjoy. Whereas, it is fairly likely my son will be the only new starter should we choose the village school.

We are trying to let him have some sort of input by visiting but he's not all that interested in school and prefers being at home. That's quite frustrating in itself as he's quick to learn and enjoys learning new things. However, he is used to my structure of teaching.

patanne

He enjoys being at home because you are a very good dad & he is the centre of attention, which he can never be at school as there will always be other kids there. I am definitely in the local village school camp, but I think he needs to know that your input in his education is not going to stop. Don't know how you will achieve that but someone will be along I am sure who knows just how to do that.

debtfreeoneday

Hi,

I've only read the last few pages or so as the issue of Schools caught my eye. We certainly aren't in a position to consider private School, but do have the small local School v large town school debate and I've spent the last four months changing and changing our choices. Small local school won for us as similar to you, I have one child that isn't great in big groups or with lots of children around! Not an easy decision is it.. more than anything I just want my children to be happy.. good luck..

patanne

I also think that a happy relaxed child learns better than one who is tense & worrying about their surroundings

AlexLK

patanne wrote: »

He enjoys being at home because you are a very good dad & he is the centre of attention, which he can never be at school as there will always be other kids there. I am definitely in the local village school camp, but I think he needs to know that your input in his education is not going to stop. Don't know how you will achieve that but someone will be along I am sure who knows just how to do that.

Thank you, patanne.

Not sure if we've had this conversation before (had it with quite a few people on here previously) but why are you firmly in the village school camp? My input in his education will not stop once he goes to school wherever he goes. The main problem is he seems to think he's missing out when he's not at home. :rotfl:

debtfreeoneday wrote: »

Hi,

I've only read the last few pages or so as the issue of Schools caught my eye. We certainly aren't in a position to consider private School, but do have the small local School v large town school debate and I've spent the last four months changing and changing our choices. Small local school won for us as similar to you, I have one child that isn't great in big groups or with lots of children around! Not an easy decision is it.. more than anything I just want my children to be happy.. good luck..

Thank you for your input.

I'm glad someone else has the same issue. Sometimes I do consider whether it's my fault or not.

Picking schools is very difficult when I've only my experience, my wife's which isn't relevant due to her attending a large town state school and my parents' to go by which also isn't relevant because that was many, many years ago.

patanne wrote: »

I also think that a happy relaxed child learns better than one who is tense & worrying about their surroundings

Patanne, I would absolutely agree though I am unsure where he would be happy and relaxed.

Unfortunately, in recent years my old prep school has become full of kids with a silly amount of technology (I know this because I do a little music work there) and I do not want my son having / wanting 'phones and computers. This may well apply to the village school also but perhaps in my naivety I wonder if there will be less technology around and more focus on having a childhood.

AlexLK

Saturday 31st January, 2015.

Dear Diary,

I'm pleased to report I've had a good week business wise and managed to keep the spreadsheets up to date. It's rather nice to see my overall wealth (if I dare call my current finances "wealth" :rotfl:) going up slightly. Furthermore, it's quite refreshing to know what stock I've got and if it's up for sale or not. This may be basic stuff to most people but it's quite the revelation to me.

I only hope I can keep on top of the record keeping when things are not on an upwards trend without killing any enthusiasm I have.

Yours Faithfully,
Alex.

patanne

I don't know whether this works the same for young children as it does for high/grammar schools. Watching children coming out of school seems to be a good guide as to the school. Locally we have 1 high school that does not have a good reputation and 2 that do. The ones coming out of the bad one have a much higher % coming out looking at the ground, alone/not talking to anyone.

The ones from the - 4th school - fee paying school look like they forgot how to dress themselves, push other people off the pavement and expect the traffic to stop for them even though the lights are against them (bankers in the making!). I should stress that I do not blame them for this but their parents who make their little darlings feel like they are entitled to behave badly with no comeback. And yes I know they don't all behave that way.

patanne

Do you think that it is possible that the more areas you can control (as with your spreadsheets) the more IN CONTROL you will feel and then things that you can't control will not bother you as much?

chevalier

Ref the local clubs thing. Do you have a local beavers pack? This is the young equivalent of cubs. They start from around 5 I think, so you would need to probably be putting him on a waiting list for your local group as they are generally very popular. They do games, and arty things as well. And the child can work towards badges too. My two are in the scouts here and they do alot of fun things. It also means they meet children who are not in their local school also.

I like the suggestion above about sending him to the village school and then maybe arrange a taster day when he is older. At 4 and a bit he will probably be nervous about whatever school he goes to (going from being the big fish in the nursery pond to little fish in the school pond). If it is a small village school even better. The class sizes will be small enough that he won't be lost in the shuffle.
My kids when we were in England went to a small village school. There were about 8 kids in my younger boys class, and 6 in my older ones year 2 class. They absolutely loved it because they had lots of time with a teacher, and could also explore topics at their own pace.

When does Little K start school? In September or at Easter? If you want to know whether he would be the only new starter ask at the nursery, there are bound to be other parents with kids due to start this school, so then that will be one less thing to worry about.
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