Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

AlexLK

Will have a look at some point. Not having a particularly good day today so hopefully there is something amusing to cheer me up a bit later.

Readytobefree

I hope today gets better for you! Can you set a small target to achieve and make you feel a bit more positive when you have a achieved it? Or play some music? Take a walk with Little K?

Keep at it we are all behind you! Go Team K :T

Igamogam

Having to limit myself to one page of your diary each time I log on Too nice here to be indoors and lots to do outdoors before first of autumn storms arrive tomorrow

fc123

AlexLK wrote: »

Whilst I'm thinking about it, I did mean to ask a question in regards to paying my debts off: can I pay off a lump sum whilst staying on the payment plan (frozen charges / interest etc.) I am on?

You could but I wouldn't. If the interest is frozen, the balance doesn't get bigger. Far better to tread water for a few months and then ask for a F+F settlement.
Back of an envelope below;
Say it's 6k, you pay off 3k so owe 3k. You may then get a F+F of 1/3 rd ; 2k so only 1k off.

If you owe 6k and ask for a F+F and get the same percentage offer, you pay 4k clear it so you will be 1k 'up'.

AlexLK

Readytobefree wrote: »

I hope today gets better for you! Can you set a small target to achieve and make you feel a bit more positive when you have a achieved it? Or play some music? Take a walk with Little K?

Keep at it we are all behind you! Go Team K :T

Thank you so much for an encouraging post. Today got a little better with time spent as a family this afternoon despite me feeling rather ashamed of my actions this morning. I suppose now I think rationally about it, I was allowing tomorrow (the in-laws 'party') and the fact I had to put some more of my treasured possessions up for sale today get to me.

Igamogam wrote: »

Having to limit myself to one page of your diary each time I log on Too nice here to be indoors and lots to do outdoors before first of autumn storms arrive tomorrow

It was far too nice to be indoors here too, I did manage to get out this afternoon. Hope you are enjoying the diary!

fc123 wrote: »

You could but I wouldn't. If the interest is frozen, the balance doesn't get bigger. Far better to tread water for a few months and then ask for a F+F settlement.
Back of an envelope below;
Say it's 6k, you pay off 3k so owe 3k. You may then get a F+F of 1/3 rd ; 2k so only 1k off.

If you owe 6k and ask for a F+F and get the same percentage offer, you pay 4k clear it so you will be 1k 'up'.

Thank you for the advice, I see exactly where you are coming from and thought that'd be the case.

fc123

AlexLK wrote: »

Will have a look at some point. Not having a particularly good day today so hopefully there is something amusing to cheer me up a bit later.

You have used that phrase a few times before....what do you mean? Like..not a good day because of a random 'not good thing' happening or 'not good' because it is how you feel? Not being 'deeeep ' or anything, just wondered really......:o

AlexLK wrote: »

Thank you so much for an encouraging post. Today got a little better with time spent as a family this afternoon despite me feeling rather ashamed of my actions this morning. I suppose now I think rationally about it, I was allowing tomorrow (the in-laws 'party') and the fact I had to put some more of my treasured possessions up for sale today get to me.

.

Did I miss something? What actions?...

.......now I read it back and this post comes over as nosy so ignore it if you like


Thinking today (as I cleaned my house ...well.. the bits that aren't in a state of demolition) the lovely Mrs K married you for many reasons. I am sure that the fact you had A Proper Job on 60k wasn't up there @ no 1. May have been down at no 12 maybe....but us girls don't marry men for one reason.:)

AlexLK

fc123: Don't worry about being 'nosy'. I am currently writing the diary entry which shall explain a little more. Basically, I felt so incapacitated by my own mind this morning I found myself slumped on the sofa staring at the wall for hours on end, occasionally at the piano to wonder why I bother when all I can hear are mistakes. Until about 1.30pm, I more or less ignored my wife and son because I was so afraid of what I might say (pleased to be going to see a specialist on Tuesday as I was feeling suicidal).

fc123

AlexLK wrote: »

fc123: Don't worry about being 'nosy'. I am currently writing the diary entry which shall explain a little more. Basically, I felt so incapacitated by my own mind this morning I found myself slumped on the sofa staring at the wall for hours on end, occasionally at the piano to wonder why I bother when all I can hear are mistakes. Until about 1.30pm, I more or less ignored my wife and son because I was so afraid of what I might say (pleased to be going to see a specialist on Tuesday as I was feeling suicidal).

Thanks for explaining. A Positive Thing ; Tuesday is only 3 sleeps away (when it could have been 8).

I really want to write something helpful, inciteful, a bit meaningful related to the above (in bold) but I don't have the life experience to do so.
I sort of know how you feel as I have had that too but could overcome it by 'forcing' myself to 'get on with things'......but I have never had really bad depression so it's hard to compare.

Hopefully, someone else may be able to come up with some advice that can help with that feeling.

AlexLK

Saturday 14th September, 2013.
Day 13.

Dear Diary,

Today has been difficult, perhaps the saying about waking up on the wrong side of the bed could be true in this instance. However, at least I managed to spend some time with my family this afternoon. When my rational mind takes over, I realise just how stupid I can be but this morning I was once again completely incapacitated by my own mind.

I'm sure many of you wonder how I am able to talk about things so openly? Well, it is not because I'm the type of person that doesn't mind what others think of me nor do I find it easy; it is because the last time I bottled up I tried to end my own life. Now I find even writing down what is going on in my head allows me to review whether those particular thoughts are prudent or not. Back to this morning, I am truly dreading seeing Mrs. K.'s family tomorrow evening for I know they will all greet us sweetly, let themselves look like the perfect little family before we all sit down to our meal and they will proceed to quietly tear me down and all because, if I'm honest with myself, they see me as an easy target. Useless, clueless and reckless Alexander who has spoiled his chances of ever being worthy of being seen as a human being within their clan and all because he fails miserably to put up and shut up.

Many, many years ago, my father said I could be anything I wanted to be and achieve anything if I put my mind to it, yet all I did was cause my poor parents grief. Even so, they still stand by me just as I will my own son, no matter what he decides to put his mind to in life. Fortunately, not all of today has been bad, this afternoon I spent time in the garden with my wife and son. Eventually, I faced the inevitable and put some more of my beloved and unique possessions up for sale, oh and this evening my wife and I gluttonously feasted on a home made Chinese feast accompanied by a deliciously crisp glass of white with more to enjoy tomorrow.

Summary:
I declare a No Spend Day, well something had to be positive, eh?

Yours faithfully,
Alex.

AlexLK

fc123 wrote: »

Thanks for explaining. A Positive Thing ; Tuesday is only 3 sleeps away (when it could have been 8).

I really want to write something helpful, inciteful, a bit meaningful related to the above (in bold) but I don't have the life experience to do so.
I sort of know how you feel as I have had that too but could overcome it by 'forcing' myself to 'get on with things'......but I have never had really bad depression so it's hard to compare.

Hopefully, someone else may be able to come up with some advice that can help with that feeling.

I should not have stopped seeing somebody about my health before:o, I am glad they have gave me a second chance as I do really need to sort this out now. It is not fair on my wife and son.

Funnily enough I was trying to "force" myself to do something, ANYTHING this morning. However, my inadequate mind won that particular battle. Until this afternoon which was nice, I do appreciate my family so very much, though I wonder if they realise this with my recurrent behaviour.