Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

Orange_Ena

7roland8 wrote: »

Great minds Orange Ena - funnily enough I've just read Mitch Albom's The Five People you Meet in Heaven again this week - a great book - and yes, it does show how we are all interconnected.

I'm itching to read it now. I've just text my friend who I borrowed it from years ago to see if she's still got it! Its quicker than Amaz0n and saves me money :money::):)

AlexLK

Orange_Ena wrote: »

Oh Alex, sorry to hear you've had a rough morning.

I'm not sure if you read much but years ago I read a great book called the Five People you Meet in Heaven. I can't remember that much about it now but when I finished reading it I remember thinking that if I ever saw someone about to jump off a bridge, I would say "wait, read this book". Each of us in this world has an effect on someone else, sometimes good, sometimes bad and whether we know it or not. I found it really moving and thought provoking.

I think I might order a copy for myself now and re-read it.

As for the in-laws, well, they sound really quite pathetic. Like bullies. I think the best was to deal with bullies is to just laugh or smile at them. I wasn't bullied at school but 2 girls from my school did start calling me names while I was on my paper round once. I just started laughing at them and cycled away. I showed them that they hadn't got to me so they gave up. It did upset me but I wasn't about to show those two moo cows that!

Stay strong and don't let them get to you. They clearly have nothing else going on in their lives if they are poking their nose in yours!

7roland8 wrote: »

Great minds Orange Ena - funnily enough I've just read Mitch Albom's The Five People you Meet in Heaven again this week - a great book - and yes, it does show how we are all interconnected.

Never read that book, no but I'll have a look out for it. I haven't read much for quite a while, in fact posting on here has made me realise just how many things I no longer do.

Yes, my in-laws could be described as "playground bullies" and of course as with playground bullies EVERYTHING is "just a joke".

fc123 wrote: »

Yes...this is the family home we bought in 1996 and we had great ideas and A Vision on how we wanted it to be.........then living and real life got in the way......and lack of funds and raising 2 kids bla bla bla.

She has always been an ugly house and architecturally, the 1968 Styleee has never come back into vogue .
However, she has always had a great location and that hasn't changed.

She was tenanted for a few years whilst we lived in Brighton and when we came back, everything seemed to need doing from new windows to new kitchen, new flooring, the list was endless.

...and it started from there as I was playing around with an Ikea CAD programme online and just couldn't fit the kitchen I wanted into the space. So we designed an extension, changed the front as much as planning would allow and it started last October. She had a horrid sunlounge tagged onto the back which, back in 96, we said ''ooooh that has to go''. Now it has.

We have had all sorts of problems from sinking floors, dodgy foundations, collapsing drains.......no heating or hot water during the snow this year, no heating at the moment either.

It will be lovely when done, we saved really hard for 3 years to do the work and, though it had taken 17 years before we could start, it will be worth it. I am thankful that we were able to do it in the end.


...just a bit of diversion in your thread to help you stop thinking about tomo....:)

Wow, your house project sounds brilliant . Ir reminds me of all the things that need doing long term here if we are to stay. However, I'm not sure we will still be living here in five years time, my parents have recently made noises about a "house swap" at some point (their house is beginning to get a bit big for them) or of them moving to a much smaller house nearer to town. Honestly, I'm not sure I could afford the utilities bills there . Though by the same token it would be wonderful to see our son grow up in the house I grew up in and everything has been done already.

heartbreak_star

AlexLK wrote: »

hahaha! I just cannot help but cringe at cheap suits (especially if worn with brown shoes which only happen to draw attention). I am also convinced that Headmaster has only one pair of cufflinks which are not very nice ... I bet he signs his documents with a biro too

Oi *prod* some of us can only afford cheap suits...however I don't think I've ever worn brown shoes with anything as all my shoes are black so they go with my whole wardrobe :rotfl:

And I'm a scientist and I sign my lab documents with a biro. It's waterproof, for starters

On a serious note Alex, keep up the good work, and so what if you stuff yourself full of lovely home-made food sometimes - good food is a good thing

Good luck with the specialist *hug* and hope your in-laws haven't been too !!!!!y. You're a great dad, and you're working hard to get your finances back in to line.

Please comtinue to keep us posted on how you're doing with everything :beer: (there's not a wine glass one!)

HBS x

AlexLK

Orange_Ena wrote: »

Meant to add - I work for the NHS as a clinician and sometimes I have patients that are a bit rude or patronising or I get the vibes that they dislike me. If I'm in the mood, I start going overboard with the compliments and friendliness, "oh that's a nice jacket" or "wow, you really don't look your age". Inside I'm laughing cause they're on the back foot and then just have to shut their cakeholes

hahaha will have to try that one!:rotfl: I don't envy you working for the NHS. However, I do thank everybody who works for the health service.

fc123 wrote: »

Very few 18 YO would be 'sensible' if given a large sum of money. I know they should be but if we had had a large sum, say 100k, and given it to our son at 18 he would have blown the lot. In fact, if I had been gifted 100k @ age 18, I would have had a ball

My old Dad intends to bypass all his children in his will and give direct to the grandchildren who range in age now from 6 - 27. He is well off and a healthy 82.
It's not our place to disagree with him but we know that receiving a large sum in ones late teens isn't going to be spent as wisely as if it was received in the older years.

Maybe it's time to reduce contact as much as possible and leave it to birthdays and Xmas until you feel stronger in yourself.

I agree completely re. the money. Unfortunately, now I have learnt my lesson with regards to wasting money. Not sure if I'm allowed to say this on here but honestly at 18, would I have done anything differently? Probably not at that age! I fondly remember my university years as the best of my life, even if I was a .....:rotfl:. However, the best days of my life are quite different.

It is time to reduce contact and I do try . However, tomorrow is a birthday and what am I meant to do when they come to my house? I can hardly tell them to go away. Worse still, it seems to be my responsibility to get brother-in-laws "princess" through her music theory exams.

Orange_Ena wrote: »

I'm itching to read it now. I've just text my friend who I borrowed it from years ago to see if she's still got it! Its quicker than Amaz0n and saves me money :money::):)

Here is where I admit, I was planning on going to the library with my son to see if they had the book and get some to read to him of an evening.

7roland8

For those who really want to read The Five People You Meet in Heaven right now - its available online here.

Orange_Ena

AlexLK wrote: »

hahaha will have to try that one!:rotfl: I don't envy you working for the NHS. However, I do thank everybody who works for the health service.

Here is where I admit, I was planning on going to the library with my son to see if they had the book and get some to read to him of an evening.

Haha no its not everyone's cup of tea, and you are most welcome!

Good idea - save money, support your local library and be able to entertain little K. :T:)

Orange_Ena

7roland8 wrote: »

For those who really want to read The Five People You Meet in Heaven right now - its available online here.

Fantastic find roland, thanks so much

7roland8

AlexLK wrote: »

However, tomorrow is a birthday and what am I meant to do when they come to my house? I can hardly tell them to go away. Worse still, it seems to be my responsibility to get brother-in-laws "princess" through her music theory exams.

Well there's no law that says they have to come to your house - too late for tomorrow but why do they come? Your wife can visit them.

I went many years never seeing mine after they stopped talking to me - would have carried on indefinitely only things mellowed after children were born.

AlexLK

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Oi *prod* some of us can only afford cheap suits...however I don't think I've ever worn brown shoes with anything as all my shoes are black so they go with my whole wardrobe :rotfl:

And I'm a scientist and I sign my lab documents with a biro. It's waterproof, for starters

On a serious note Alex, keep up the good work, and so what if you stuff yourself full of lovely home-made food sometimes - good food is a good thing

Good luck with the specialist *hug* and hope your in-laws haven't been too !!!!!y. You're a great dad, and you're working hard to get your finances back in to line.

Please comtinue to keep us posted on how you're doing with everything :beer: (there's not a wine glass one!)

HBS x

LOL! Mrs. K. has been known to buy children's shoes for herself, her recentish purchase was a pair of Hunter wellies, yep kids ones because the ladies were over £80 and the kids £35, so we aren't COMPLETE idiots with our money ... OK Mrs. K. isn't .

Thank you We are going to try to keep up the good work on the money front, it is actually something I'm feeling rather proud of myself about.

Of course I will continue to post, so much good advice on here and it keeps my spending in check as I have to tell you lot how much I've spent everyday .

AlexLK

7roland8 wrote: »

Well there's no law that says they have to come to your house - too late for tomorrow but why do they come? Your wife can visit them.

I went many years never seeing mine after they stopped talking to me - would have carried on indefinitely only things mellowed after children were born.

Brother-in-law is very close to wife, he really can do no wrong in Mrs. K.'s eyes. Her sister doesn't come very often. Parents come over sometimes but not very often (thank goodness). I don't feel I can stop them to be honest, especially as we are so close to my parents.