Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

Granariesgirl

Hello All!

Good grief it's been WEEKS since I've popped into MSE...:eek:

It must be the effort of all that yoghurt-knitting, or was it because I was too busy supporting the French wine industry...? (Well,one cannot live on yoghurt alone!;))

I hope Pater is improving Alex, it must be so tough for your Mum, my sympathies are with her.

Sorry to hear about Mrs K's spending meltdown - I hope things improve.

Before insisting on Prep school, have you looked for OFSTED outstanding rated schools in your area? I'm still singing my tune of State Primary then Public Secondary... my DC is not lagging behind at all (in fact is in top groups for most subjects) so our village school did a great job as far as I'm concerned! I reckon we saved around £30-40k, that we didn't have, on school fees too! :cool:

All the comments on here about doing nothing reminded me of a great song my Dad had & we used to sing together when we were having a skyve (kite flying, walk etc.) instead of doing boring stuff... hope it cheers everyone up!

Here's the song...*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Cc62oBsUeE

Now y'all have a nice day there!



*The Daily Motion video from the original Crosby & co. film, which is great, is unpasteable here for some reason so for anyone interested, just put in the website name followed by : /video/x2p4x8_busy-doing-nothing_people

artichoke

Hi

I know all the different league tables of schools are very controversial but many of the schools in rural derbyshire are considered to be very good, i know there has been a lot in the local press about one or two town centre schools who have been having problems but the village primaries are very good - some very, very good near to here.

http://primary-schools.findthebest.co.uk - put in your postcode and see what comes up.

If you are concerned about the breadth of subjects taught not being as wide as you would like have you considered sending DS to one of the better village primaries and then paying for after school tuition for the extra subjects you would like him to do?


I know a few parents who have done that and paid from age 4 onwards for private french, music or other tuition.

Are there particular subjects you are concerned DS will be missing at a state primary?

art

AlexLK

mum2one wrote: »

I guess Mrs K just hasn't seen her lightbulb moment, and while you have accepted the debt then I guess she feels "entitled to" an equivalent sum or item/s she wants

The spending spree on Sat was just past a joke, yes we all need clothes, for some people they only get 1k per month for everything, yes we all want, me I want my holidays, but I will sarifice everything to get them, I have to get the holidays when I can, health reasons dictate a lot and financial, - but if Mrs K wants to spend a fortune then I think she needs to sell some thing to replace those items.

I know you feel the debt is your responsibility, but I bet a penny to a £1, Mrs K had some of those benefits?? That is done and dusted - but you need to think about these, like the car at Christmas that came from the business, - ok your not drawing a wage - but that puts pressure in other directions to keep the budget.

Weekends when DD was Little K's age - would be a trip to the park, the swings, local playground, local farm, swimming,

Indoors - colouring, games, cooking, making a mess.

It doesn't have to shopping all the time x

Hi mum2one,

I cannot say I was best pleased with my wife's attitude to spending this weekend and still am not. However, she has always had a "want it, want it NOW" view and to her credit most things she wanted she has had. She didn't grow up with money being thrown around, so I suppose she sees being able to have the things she wants as being rather important.

As for our weekends, I was going to spend some time on Thursday seeing if I could come up with a few ideas.

heartbreak_star wrote: »

All debt is bad debt, except perhaps a mortgage which is generally an unfortunate necessity.

HBS x

I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm starting to think along the same lines, I don't ever want to be in debt again.

AlexLK

Granariesgirl wrote: »

Hello All!

Good grief it's been WEEKS since I've popped into MSE...:eek:

It must be the effort of all that yoghurt-knitting, or was it because I was too busy supporting the French wine industry...? (Well,one cannot live on yoghurt alone!;))

I hope Pater is improving Alex, it must be so tough for your Mum, my sympathies are with her.

Sorry to hear about Mrs K's spending meltdown - I hope things improve.

Before insisting on Prep school, have you looked for OFSTED outstanding rated schools in your area? I'm still singing my tune of State Primary then Public Secondary... my DC is not lagging behind at all (in fact is in top groups for most subjects) so our village school did a great job as far as I'm concerned! I reckon we saved around £30-40k, that we didn't have, on school fees too! :cool:

All the comments on here about doing nothing reminded me of a great song my Dad had & we used to sing together when we were having a skyve (kite flying, walk etc.) instead of doing boring stuff... hope it cheers everyone up!

Here's the song...*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Cc62oBsUeE

Now y'all have a nice day there!



*The Daily Motion video from the original Crosby & co. film, which is great, is unpasteable here for some reason so for anyone interested, just put in the website name followed by : /video/x2p4x8_busy-doing-nothing_people

Hello Granaries!

I hope you are well and glad to hear your yoghurt knitting is ticking over well.

Yes, father is improving slowly. My mother has found things difficult but she'll be OK.

Unfortunately, things don't seem to be improving for my wife's attitude to money for the moment. She has seen a few other things she wants to buy and no doubt will and she's decided to tag along with her brother, his wife and two other couples I barely know for a 5 day break to Rome at the end of next month too.

I have had a brief look into the schools near to us but none have particularly impressed me.

artichoke wrote: »

Hi

I know all the different league tables of schools are very controversial but many of the schools in rural derbyshire are considered to be very good, i know there has been a lot in the local press about one or two town centre schools who have been having problems but the village primaries are very good - some very, very good near to here.

http://primary-schools.findthebest.co.uk - put in your postcode and see what comes up.

If you are concerned about the breadth of subjects taught not being as wide as you would like have you considered sending DS to one of the better village primaries and then paying for after school tuition for the extra subjects you would like him to do?


I know a few parents who have done that and paid from age 4 onwards for private french, music or other tuition.

Are there particular subjects you are concerned DS will be missing at a state primary?

art

Hi Art,

Thank you for the link.

There would be no point in paying for my son to do music as we already do that together. However, I do not think any subject is covered in the same detail at a state school (that may be too much of a generalisation but from what I've read on the internet, it often seems to be the case). Music is hardly covered, I know that much whereas at the school I wish my son to go to, they study music theory.

The only subject I am concerned is entirely missing from the state curriculum is Classics but that is more because I used to really enjoy it, even as a 9 year old.

I am somewhat confused what would happen to my son aged 11, also as I do not believe that is the time for him to go to senior school and mix with (and be influenced by) 15 and 16 year old pupils.

7roland8

Gosh Alex is your wife going without you?
Not that solo holidays are bad - but once you have a child your world does tend to change - for most people.

Re 11 year olds - when I started secondary school none of us younger ones ever mixed with the older ones - who went up to 18. We just mixed with our own age.

AlexLK

Roland: Yes, she's going on her own, it's only for 5 days. I think she just needs a break away from everything at the moment, things aren't really going her way work wise.

I suppose he wouldn't mix with them in a particularly social way but would see them when doing ECs?

littlegreenparrot

It's great to see how your attitude is developing (and improving) towards managing your money.

Regarding Little K mixing with 15 year olds in a state secondary, that is a worry you can take off the list. In 10 years experience working in secondary schools I have hardly ever seen Year 7 mixing with year 10 (that would be 11 and 15 year olds).

They certainly have no interest in each other socially, and extra curricular activities are arranged on a year group basis. Any mixing of year groups is likely to only be with the year above.

I remember being at school at the same time as my younger brother, and we certainly had nothing to do with each other, it's not cool

CloseLobster

Alex, you are enjoying working in a school teaching music, and are concerned about where Little K does his education, so why not join the dots - and train to be a qualified teacher? You will be able to enjoy the school holidays with your son, you'll have a professional career and if you work in the private sector - might be able to get a discount on the fees.

PinotGrigio41

Hi Alex, how are you doing ?

I'm not sure if I have mentioned this before re the school subject so I apologise if I have.

We sent DD1 to Independent school at 3 1/2 , she loved it, cost us a small fortune. Then DD2 came along and we were concerned as to how we would pay for her as well. To cut a long story short we then moved house. I could have kept DD1 at the Independent school with a fairly long journey each day but decided to look at the state schools of which there were five locally. I took her with me and between us made the decision that we would take her out of the independent school and pop her into the State one. We have intermittently paid for tuition admittedly for Maths which isn't her strongest subject. We still have friends who stayed at the original fee paying school of the same age as her. They are all sitting their GCSEs this summer. DD1 is on target to achieve similar grades, is just as happy and her future is looking as rosie as theirs. I have been asked many a time if I have any regrets removing her from Private Education and I can honestly say I haven't. We have had the odd problem but no more or less than friends with children in Private Schools. Infact there are bigger drug and drink problems there where the children are far more privileged and money isn't an option and dished out willy nilly to the children. That worries me far more than their grades if Im honest.

As far as Classics go, at my DD's school it can be studied in year 11 and then at A level. I would seriously consider thinking about the state schools, maybe go for a look around and ask some questions.Take Little K with you and see how he reacts. Thats always very telling in my opinion no matter how little they are. If they appear comfortable in their surroundings it says alot about the school I feel. Then maybe consider some extra tuition should the need arise. As far as mixing with older pupils as has been said before its not that likely. DD1 in Year 11 now mixes a little with the years above and below as does DD2 who is currently in year 8 , but certainly no older than that and they don't attend the same parties, social events outside of school.

I do think the whole education area is food for thought for you. I can understand why you want the little one privately educated but its not always the best choice and I would weigh up all options available to you personally.

Take Care Alex xx

pebbles88

AlexLK wrote: »

Roland: Yes, she's going on her own, it's only for 5 days. I think she just needs a break away from everything at the moment, things aren't really going her way work wise.

Work is a difficult place for pretty much everyone nowadays... Companies wanting to save money, so staff being expected to take on additional work .. Etc etc yada yada...

:eek:
but!!! most of us wouldn't decide we needed a very expensive break to be able to cope with it. :eek:

Nor could most of us afford it anyway, I make do with curling up with my lovely Oh, watching an incredibly silly film to make me laugh, and then something lovely like spending time with oh's son playing board games Or going for a nice walk with great company.

I'm sorry if I've not said that the best way I could. It's just you've worked very hard, & had to face a lot of things that haven't been nice during the last few months, & it seems she is trying to demoralise you or just doesn't care about how things are going for you all as a family.

Don't get me wrong, 'things' are great at the time, but at the end of the day... They mean very little compared to your family.

I think whatever you choose for little K will be fine, as it's obvious you will always invest time into helping him learn & understand as much as he can. You might not always feel it, but we can all see how good a father you are.

(((Hugs)))