Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

AlexLK

mum2one wrote: »

I have to confess you may find my main thread on here, Santas Challenge - theres a group of us that start Xmas shopping in Jan sales........ Help the budgets, and we can save.

Excluding DD and my parents

Birthdays - 17 people to buy for - my budget £235, I spent £105, proper price £469.

Christmas - 50 people (that includes the token presents for school teacher,TA, office staff, excluding DD and parents - buying off myself and some people have presents off DD as well)

Budget - £530, spent £273, proper price £1108.

All done, ready to be wrapped.

DD - her main xmas prezzie - shes having laptop, (off me and parents) so few odds and sods
£150 for DD
£100 for parents - then £20 for DD to buy parents prezzies.

Yes, I can loan the dog out, he excellent at chewing what he shouldn't. he's rather partial to Tetleys bitter, and leather slippers!

One of these yrs I would love to escape for Xmas and not buy any presents.... half way there last yr took DD to Lapland, we did the last trip b4 Xmas - it was amazing, expensive but worth it. Little K would love that when he's older.

xx

:rotfl: re. the Santa's Challenge. Well, I was until I saw how much you'd saved, then I began to wonder who was having the last laugh.

Little K already loves Christmas and I'm sure he'd adore visiting Lapland. OK, OK, so would I and Mrs. K. too...

As for your daughter, she's got more technology than I. Mind, that is not saying a lot, computer is five years old, TV came out of my grandparents house and I've never saw the point in over complicated mobile phones. Mrs. K. likes some tech though, so I'll say your girl's got more than her instead. I did tell a pupil to record themselves and showed them how to do it onto a cassette. Child's mother then told me she'd not even seen a tape deck in years (kid didn't know what it was!!!:eek:) and they'll record the piece onto said child's iPad where they can also video too.

Excellent news re. the dog, do you deliver or do I need to collect?

mum2one

AlexLK wrote: »

Thank you for your post.

I have a lot of collectables, some of which are worth a lot of money. Not all pens / watches. E.g. I also have a lot of model cars, one of which is scheduled to start tomorrow, is about 3 inches long and worth about £150 alone. Think I said on here there is money in anything, should one look hard enough. :rotfl:


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Oh, she realises. To be honest I'm still not happy about it but I'll let it go if everything can be made right between us, though that remains to be seen.
The thing is u need to make sure your not just papering over the cracks, - i guess if she not been fully aware of the debts, or buried her head, or 1001 (trying to see both sides). I dont think your there yet, but maybe long term do you think that marriage councelling may help?


Not sure if Mrs. K. would be up for this at this moment in time because she sees it that she earns so much more than I so should have so much more than I.

Brick wall moment, I think sitting down and discussing money has to be done, even if it over a bottle of wine?

She hasn't.



I should explain this, in times gone by we'd have up to 3 cars each and a bike each - we actually met through classic cars. Currently, I have the Triumph, I say "I", she drives it more than me at the moment. She decided to keep her BSA and sell her old BMW, as at that time she was more into the bike. We got rid of a few vehicles because of money, nothing to do with our son.

Ah so classic cars are in the blood, then that is going to a harder habit to break, i wasn't sure of the car had to go as it was only 2 seats, I guess Mrs K now wants her old habit back. Maybe if you could get the budget sorted she could save towards one????


Thank you . I would like to go but we shall see what Friday brings.

I'm putting my foot down, you go on Friday, you want to go, from what I have read its not as though you are out drinking 10 pints a night and rolling in drunk..... if you miss Friday night its could end up festering into an arguement, and be used as I couldn't go because you took the money, it needs to be a 2 way thing, give and take... if it is not Mrs K's scence then ok, everyone differs,

This is going to sound like a spinster confession, my longest relationship was 2 yrs, although its very weird were friends, but we had different interests, I remember once going to see Showaddywaddy with a group from work as he hated the group, yearly the highlight of his yr was the Flower show, you wouldn't get me through the gates, but our best experience was going to London we stayed as Cumberland Hotel by Marble Arch (this was back in 1997), and going to see Phamton of the Opera. The tickets for the show cost more than the hotel (we'd done a special offer rail break) there was an error with the booking so we got upgraded to a posh room. We had a lot of give and take. What broke us up was his job, I'd gone back to college and even thou it was part time, the homework was full time, plus changed jobs, a lot went on.

Please consider Friday night, trust me your regret it if you don't x

AlexLK

Mum2one: Just about to go to bed, so sorry this may be a little abrupt.

We are investigating going to counselling, such a lot has happened over the years that I hope we can once and for all reconcile our differences.

Yes, we need to discuss money, she was very on board when I first started making this diary and we had a couple of blissfully happy weeks, enjoying the simpler things in life and taking time to investigate new things for our son. However, I think she's found it difficult, more difficult than she has told me.

Our plan was once the debts was clear, Mrs. K. would buy a £1,500 MGB GT with some margin in which she'd use to trade up. We'd all enjoy that. (Yes, son is already a petrolhead, ).

I don't suppose it is Mrs. K.'s scene really and no drinking will be involved ... being an organ recital, it's at a church :rotfl:.

mum2one

AlexLK wrote: »

Mum2one: Just about to go to bed, so sorry this may be a little abrupt.

We are investigating going to counselling, such a lot has happened over the years that I hope we can once and for all reconcile our differences.

Yes, we need to discuss money, she was very on board when I first started making this diary and we had a couple of blissfully happy weeks, enjoying the simpler things in life and taking time to investigate new things for our son. However, I think she's found it difficult, more difficult than she has told me.

Our plan was once the debts was clear, Mrs. K. would buy a £1,500 MGB GT with some margin in which she'd use to trade up. We'd all enjoy that. (Yes, son is already a petrolhead, ).

I don't suppose it is Mrs. K.'s scene really and no drinking will be involved ... being an organ recital, it's at a church :rotfl:.

Alex you are a gentleman, pleased that your looking into counselling, didnt want you to think I was prying or trying to hook myself a toyboy;)

Ah bless Little K. I could imagine him with the cars, the technology kids have now adays is unbelievable, I was 13 when I first had a computer, that was a Commodore 64, thats def showing my age!

DD just turned 11, got a better phone than me, but give her due she saved up for it out of her birthday money, kids now adays have the technology, i know theres 10yrs between us, but as I kid I was lucky to have a black and white TV. DD has a lot but not from a spolit brat perspective, shes had her wings clipped and never been allowed freedom, so has had to had to be a hoe bird, so technology follows, and at schools now computers are as common as a pencil

Shall I send DD to you, apparently as there yr 6, she can write in Fountain Pen...

So what have you got planned for Little K, is he 2 or 3? There at a age that they can't have a list - thats great.......

DD unfortunatly she follows me for itchy feet - her list includes going back to Tunisia (4 times), Goa, Kenya, New York, Cyprus, Turkey, Gambia but she will go back to towyn, and down to Devon........ x

AlexLK

mum2one wrote: »

Alex you are a gentleman, pleased that your looking into counselling, didnt want you to think I was prying or trying to hook myself a toyboy;)

Ah bless Little K. I could imagine him with the cars, the technology kids have now adays is unbelievable, I was 13 when I first had a computer, that was a Commodore 64, thats def showing my age!

DD just turned 11, got a better phone than me, but give her due she saved up for it out of her birthday money, kids now adays have the technology, i know theres 10yrs between us, but as I kid I was lucky to have a black and white TV. DD has a lot but not from a spolit brat perspective, shes had her wings clipped and never been allowed freedom, so has had to had to be a hoe bird, so technology follows, and at schools now computers are as common as a pencil

Shall I send DD to you, apparently as there yr 6, she can write in Fountain Pen...

So what have you got planned for Little K, is he 2 or 3? There at a age that they can't have a list - thats great.......

DD unfortunatly she follows me for itchy feet - her list includes going back to Tunisia (4 times), Goa, Kenya, New York, Cyprus, Turkey, Gambia but she will go back to towyn, and down to Devon........ x

Thank you and :rotfl:. I think we both (Mrs. K. and I) want to make this work and we both find things incredibly hard going at times. We had a nice morning together and I had to practically drag her out of the house to work ... she's off to see awkward contractor today, ha, de, ha... I only laugh because she finds some of my fussy customers amusing.

My parents were strict about technology when I was growing up, it didn't harm me but I can see me having to give in to Little K as he gets older. I am aware re. the computer situation at schools also there are even some at NURSERY!

:rotfl: Only if your daughter has an interest in nice pens, hobby for life that one ... then again, I'm not sure you would like her to get into collecting pens. Strangely enough I was discussing handwriting on here, giving advice regarding somebody's son who has apparently "terrible handwriting" with plenty saying it was a "boy thing", um no, in my father's generation good handwriting was expected but now it seems comment worthy.

Little K will be 3. As for what we've got planned, so far we haven't ... I was possibly thinking of inviting two or three of his nursery friends round but not sure if appropriate.

You're like Mrs. K. then, she loves her sun. I like travelling too but not so fussed on the beach holiday formula although it works nicely with our son to think about.

EchoDelta

I hear you re the computers in nursery! They have one at Small's pre school. She is also really good at using our digital camera (she poses us and then gets the picture back on screen for us to review after ) and can find and use the flash light and camera apps on my phone. She is 3....!!! :eek:

And teh "it's a boy thing" drives me MAD!!!! If you are after another book check out "Pink Brain Blue Brain". Really intersting debunk of the so called inate differences between boys and girls.

Hope that you have a good week.

All this talk of holidays makes the day seem extra specially grey today!!!

littlegreenparrot

I'm sorry. I should have been more clear in what I meant in terms of budgeting between couples.

What I mean is that using your SOA, you agree an amount (useful to do as proportion of the budget. eg. if one member brings in 65% of the total, they contribute that much) between you that is allocated to the joint account. So for us that is bills, groceries, joint savings projects.

What is remaining is for my personal car expenses, hair cuts, personal savings projects, general gadding about money etc (most of which I save)
I am suggesting it because there is then no guilt attached, or expectation of explanation. One of the difficult things I find about becoming debt free is it feels so endless. If you have an amount every month that is yours to 'play with' if you like it can help to prevent the binges.

Its a suggestion, others are much more focused and can clear it more quickly.

AlexLK

EchoDelta wrote: »

I hear you re the computers in nursery! They have one at Small's pre school. She is also really good at using our digital camera (she poses us and then gets the picture back on screen for us to review after ) and can find and use the flash light and camera apps on my phone. She is 3....!!! :eek:

And teh "it's a boy thing" drives me MAD!!!! If you are after another book check out "Pink Brain Blue Brain". Really intersting debunk of the so called inate differences between boys and girls.

Hope that you have a good week.

All this talk of holidays makes the day seem extra specially grey today!!!

Not really introduced our son to technology, nor does he seem interested at this moment in time.

I'll have a look, used to quite fancy myself as a bit of a philosopher back in my uni days . Drives Mrs. K. mad as if it can't be answered in a calculation, she's not much interested. She said yesterday evening she felt as if we were "just existing", I countered but what is it to exist?

Weather has been awful here too.

AlexLK

littlegreenparrot wrote: »

I'm sorry. I should have been more clear in what I meant in terms of budgeting between couples.

What I mean is that using your SOA, you agree an amount (useful to do as proportion of the budget. eg. if one member brings in 65% of the total, they contribute that much) between you that is allocated to the joint account. So for us that is bills, groceries, joint savings projects.

What is remaining is for my personal car expenses, hair cuts, personal savings projects, general gadding about money etc (most of which I save)
I am suggesting it because there is then no guilt attached, or expectation of explanation. One of the difficult things I find about becoming debt free is it feels so endless. If you have an amount every month that is yours to 'play with' if you like it can help to prevent the binges.

Its a suggestion, others are much more focused and can clear it more quickly.

Just about to start work again ... no rest for the wicked, will have a think on this one and possibly present to Mrs. K.

LannieDuck

AlexLK wrote: »

Drives Mrs. K. mad as if it can't be answered in a calculation, she's not much interested. She said yesterday evening she felt as if we were "just existing", I countered but what is it to exist?

If Mrs K is so into calculations, I can't understand why she isn't taking more responsibility for the budgeting. The 'just existing' isn't down to your debts - it's a question of income vs outgoings. If she wants to free up more money for treats, she needs to take a look at the figures and work out where that money's going to come from.

Btw, keep meaning to ask - have you checked your gas/elec prices? I was able to save about £100 a year by switching those. And you don't suffer any lower quality of life as a result Ditto with car/home insurance. And any mobile phones that are out of contract.