This Time I'm Really Going To Do It

Humdinger1

We do love you @Watty1

Watty1

Thank you all so much for your kind messages.  I am really touched.    I went quiet. Partly I wondered if he was reading here. Now I think he is not so good on that front but the main reason was I hit a pit of depression.  Mood tanked. GP prescribed anti-depressants and counselling.  I'm still waiting for the counselling review to take place but then the universe, fate, god call it what you will helped out..  

A while ago I did a course and as part of that a Facebook group was started. Well someone in the group posted that she was doing a hypnotherapy course and wanted case studies. I offered myself.    And she has been awesome.  I don't quite know how it works but I have one session where I make a plan for one thing that would move me forwards in my life - it has to be within my control - and then we have a hypnosis session.  I then listen to the recording of my hypnosis tape each night at bedtime.  

And here I am some weeks later and not in the depths of depression, haven't taken the meds prescribed by GP and I feel I can cope with the situation I am in. Yes I do have very down days but mostly I am now chugging along and trying to think of solutions about the issues facing me. As I type this I realise I don't think about going back to him now other than in fleeting moments which is part of grieving the end of a relationship I suppose..  

I've done nothing about his latest set of demands as was focused on finding a mortgage. Can't get a mortgage on a property with an overage. Didn't know that.  Property requires a cash buyer so the price  agreed at the hearing was unrealistic.   The property always will require a cash buyer.   As ever a solution has been found which involves splitting the land away from the house to two titles and then he will have an overage on the land and I can mortgage the house.   That bit will just take time.  I'm not going back to argue the property price because I have just had enough and if we do the title split it will be a solution.

In the meantime he continues to live at the house, I pay all the bills but I do have the income from the rental property to subsidise those and i live elsewhere.

A joyful moment - it was my birthday at the weekend and I had a BBQ outside in the small orchard opposite my rental. That was lovely although I confess to drinking too much fizz. But it was my birthday so I am forgiving myself that.  Awesome friends came. i really loved it.  My sister came too which was nice (still cautious on the sister front but lets just go for face value for now).  Loved my friends tho.  Some super plants gifted for the garden at the cottage with spa goodies to make evening bathtimes fun and a couple of afternoon tea vouchers too.   So awesome gifts.  Splashed out on getting caterers in for the BBQ and my goodness that was so worth it. I felt really special doing that and I didn't have to worry about the food at all.  Nice

So from my worst moments of depression I seem to have moved forwards somehow.     Watty x

Humdinger1

Hurray for @Watty1! Hurray, hurray and welcome back!!  Sounds like a good plan, as ever. Looking forward to the next stage of your adventures love Humdinger xx 

greent

Great to hear from you - many hugs xx

Suffolk_lass

Good to see you back and posting again. We all continue to be on your team x

Alchemilla

So glad you are back. KBO. 

Karmacat

Watty!  Good to see you back.  Your birthday sounds fantastic, and so does the hypnotherapy actually - I think it can be really effective when it's helping you towards something you want to do, and the woman doing the course is obviously already a good practitioner.  Here's to things working out.

ajmoney

Happy to have you posting again Watty.  You are never alone so please reach out if you want to rant x

Ramouth

Lovey to see you back watty!  I’m impressed with how proactive you are.  You recognise something is wrong then get on with trying to make it better instead of just moping.  Inspirational.

Your birthday sounds lovely and you obviously have some good friends.  You have been through some terrible times but it looks like you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and a path to freedom.

Watty1

Bless you all for being such awesome cheerleaders.     Vile traffic out there today.  Have spent nearly all day driving to dentist and back again.   UGH!  Now I am back at my office but it will shortly be time to go again as the ex is in the house and tonight is my hypnotherapy session and I really want some peace for that and I feel he is too much in my energy field.  Are energy fields even a thing?    I just feel him around even if he cannot hear so going home to do that.   Shame as I am somewhat behind at work (as ever was thus) so thats my weekend sorted!  
Not such a problem tho' as need to go to the cottage Saturday to meet someone about chopping down a tree.