This Time I'm Really Going To Do It

Secret_Saving_Squirrel

Watty, I really empathise and understand your frustration. Families are a nightmare when it comes to money. We have had some bad experiences and lost a lot of hard earned money helping out people who don't work as hard as we have done, and who spend on indulgences that we would never dream of. And it really hurts. Really really hurts. Now, I will never mix family and money again.
Like you, my oh has subsidised members of his family without consulting me, and also like you it has made me question why I bother to be careful. But it is in me to save, and whilst I did stop overpaying a couple of times, I still saved into a personal stash so that I could always pack my red spotted hanky and escape. But so far it hasn't happened as oh always realised just in time what an idiot he was, and I am sure yours will too.
Thinking of you. X

Watty1

Thank you all so much for the lovely comments and the indignation on my behalf. Will see what transpires over weekend.
and £500 transferred to premium bonds. I know I could do something more sensible with the money in terms of interest rates etc but putting there sits well with how I feel at the moment.
And I love the red spotted hanky image.... kitten and I may yet have a !!!! Whittington moment

EatingTheElephant

I’m totally speechless Watty, what are they all thinking? I find people so hard to understand sometimes.

I do love the image of the spotty hankie, although my mum always used to say she was going to buy a sparkly leotard and run away with the circus when she felt like running away. Most handsome could join in too then!

smallholdingsister

Since you have neices I suggest you tell Mr Watty that you agree to his handing over the money so long as you give an equal amount to your neices (and by the way we'll have to start saving now).

Obviously that's not the way to go but it might make him think.

Firegirl

Small holding sister has a point. Why not crank up a spreadsheet with scenarios on how you would like to write your wills. Make sure you factually cover all scenarios and then see what one he chooses. Think of the 3 Ds- death divorce and debt. This will make him see clearly that the plan is ludicrous. Also if he hasn’t changed a will then it’s all just talk. Was it a boozy chat? Really it has to have been. Maybe he was just running the idea past you thinking it’s a good idea!

Anyway what ever happens you gotta talk about it. You might find out some crazy logic like that he thought you’d think it was a good idea because.....

Hope you get it sorted soon!

Betterthanever

Just catching up on diaries and all I can say has been said already. I love the spotted hanky image too, however and have always had a "running away fund" just in case. Mind you for the majority of my life I was so skint I would only have been able to run as far as the garden gate!

I hope you're able to get things sorted.

gallygirl

Well b*ll*cks to that I'm afraid!!!!!! I'd be exactly the same as you Watty, angered and hurt beyond belief. Oooohhhhh, am so annoyed on your behalf :mad:.

Hope he has seen the light over the weekend.

apple_muncher

I think the dog should go. Thinking of you x

Karmacat

**awaits update**

Watty1

gallygirl wrote: »

Hope he has seen the light over the weekend.

Sadly not. Things have gone from bad to worse.
He is hell bent on giving the money away and if I want to give the same amount to my nieces then I can..... he has no idea where that will come from but hey ho. I've gone through scenarios with him and showed him our retirement pot is woefully insufficient and he just says he wants his family in his life and he hasn't spent enough time with them and he is going to put that right now.
I tried pointing out that would be the family that hasn't been available for support over the last god knows how many years and that this would be the very brother who doesn't even support his own mother when her partner passed away and ...yes that would be them.


And yes things can still get worse.... see next post