Husband's ex wife wanting more money

Shelldean

to be fair to the OP she's not moaning about the CM, she's moaning about the extra being asked.... but I will admit now I've skimmed the thread so apologies if she has also moaned about CM

tinkerbell28

I knew it was coming....I could not understand the hostility towards you op....I presumed....rightly it was an axe to grind, second wife kind of thing. As with all the money she gets and minimal mortgage....you have to wonder where it all goes especially with a minimal mortgage.


Bang some one said it, second wife, Don't know why people can't just say it, rather than insinuate.

Ohh and for clarification, I'm not a second wife, and my husband only has kids with me, so no agenda. I could see others poking though a mile off though. A lot of anti second wife undertones without seeing it from a balanced view point. IMVHO.

duchy

Shelldean wrote: »

to be fair to the OP she's not moaning about the CM, she's moaning about the extra being asked.... but I will admit now I've skimmed the thread so apologies if she has also moaned about CM

You missed the bit where she didn't think they should support his child at all as his mother got a larger percentage of the house then.

And OP I'm sorry if it upsets you to be considered predictable or a cliche .....but as I observed there is a pattern with posts on here ......and a time frame ....and you have fit it very neatly - sorry if you thought you were been more original but you aren't <shrug>

duchy

Actually this was the bit that made me laugh .
Apparently we are supposed to applaude the OP's husband for allowing his own son a bedroom !!!

Melaniep101 wrote: »

Just to clarify, re the house that she lives in - She has been a SAHM since DSS was born and they (my hub) bought the house. He decided not to make her sell the house when they divorced because he didn't want to turf his boy out of his bedroom. I agree that hubby seems a bit soft, but he is a kind and generous man, but it seems like the ex is taking full advantage of that.

Thanks again everyone!

Yeah really soft allowing the poor kid his own bedroom. LOL
(Possibly the prospect of a court ordering the distribution of the marital assets might have had a tiny bit to do with it too)

duchy

Melaniep101 wrote: »

Just to clarify, re the house that she lives in - She has been a SAHM since DSS was born and they bought the house.

Thanks again everyone!

You mean the house she now owns (bar a small mortgage). Her house- she doesn't just live in it . It is hers.

Can you really not see how resentful and bitter you sound ?
You talked about your daughter but his son is referred to as "The boy". ?
When you marry a man with children -you are in a way marrying them too -I don't think you quite see it that way though ! Does your husband call your daughter "The girl" ?

tinkerbell28

duchy wrote: »

You missed the bit where she didn't think they should support his child at all as his mother got a larger percentage of the house then.

And OP I'm sorry if it upsets you to be considered predictable or a cliche .....but as I observed there is a pattern with posts on here ......and a time frame ....and you have fit it very neatly - sorry if you thought you were been more original but you aren't <shrug>

duchy wrote: »

Actually this was the bit that made me laugh .
Apparently we are supposed to applaude the OP's husband for allowing his own son a bedroom !!!



Yeah really soft allowing the poor kid his own bedroom. LOL
(Possibly the prospect of a court ordering the distribution of the marital assets might have had a tiny bit to do with it too)

duchy wrote: »

You mean the house she now owns (bar a small mortgage). Her house- she doesn't just live in it . It is hers.

Can you really not see how resentful and bitter you sound ?
You talked about your daughter but his son is referred to as "The boy". ?
When you marry a man with children -you are in a way marrying them too -I don't think you quite see it that way though ! Does your husband call your daughter "The girl" ?

Errr where did she say that???

Honestly what is your problem? You are the only one who sounds bitter. Twisting and putting words in ops mouth for your own agenda.

Post after post of ranting!

All you have done is made snide digs at the op, putting words into her mouth and now, I am presuming as it is late, after a drink or too, launched a full on attack at her.

Re read it in the morning. Op does not come off bad here.

duchy

Bless your heart but I don't drink

Interesting how people here always assure if someone disagrees with them they must be drunk ......perhaps that is how it works in the "house that you live in"

tinkerbell28

duchy wrote: »

Bless your heart but I don't drink

Interesting how people here always assure if someone disagrees with them they must be drunk ......perhaps that is how it works in the "house that you live in"

Again what is it with you? Why do you have to resort to insulting people on this thread. Those that dare see the second wives point of view, all call you out for your bias?

All through the thread you have had a clear anti second wives agenda. You've been out and out nasty to the op frankly. Then you finally admitted it, she was a "typical second wife".

You've twisted her words, you've actually made stuff up, you've gone into full blown attack, patronising and frankly nasty mode as it is late. So she won't be onto reply.

Are you really frothing that much you had to make multiple posts to get your anger out?

I think you need to calm down, the op is not the one looking bitter and twisted.

Oh I'm a fitness freak, I don't drink as it has too many carbs

duchy

No actually I have nothing against second wives -I'll shortly be one myself - however I am heartily sick of women who want the man but either don't want or resent the children that come as a part of the package.

They marry (or move in) with these men knowing there are children - and then two or three years down the line it seems to start. Frankly it's horrible. If they don't want to have to deal with a husband who supports his kids and or who at times co-parents with an ex....then marry a man with no children.

There are some fantastic step mums around but these resentful wenches give all step mothers a bad name !

tinkerbell28

duchy wrote: »

No actually I have nothing against second wives -I'll shortly be one myself - however I am heartily sick of women who want the man but either don't want or resent the children that come as a part of the package.

They marry (or move in) with these men knowing there are children - and then two or three years down the line it seems to start. Frankly it's horrible. If they don't want to have to deal with a husband who supports his kids and or who at times co-parents with an ex....then marry a man with no children.

There are some fantastic step mums around but these resentful wenches give all step mothers a bad name !

Where exactly would you say op is one of the bad ones? Or a "Wench". I'm not talking things you think she has said, but has not, or things you think of her.

As far as I can see the husband paid off most of the house, leaving the ex with a £30k mortgage. This will be in the region of £150 per month, I do know that for a mortgage of that size, plus it will be considerably less than social housing.

She then has her wages, her tax credits, both CTC and WTC and child benefit. On top she will then have the £450 maintenance. That will all add up to a tidy sum for one child. Not to mention keeping the house going for the ex. 2 people in total.

All I have seen is op, being a bit miffed at why all of a sudden, she can't afford school uniform. Not to mention things like xbox's she demands out of the blue. Considering she gets a tidy sum anyway for one child and would have low housing costs. It is a fair question I would say.

She is not begrudging child maintenance, or co-parenting, with trips out and things like that. She has been responding to accusations, from people like you who have twisted her words, thrown snide digs, made stuff up, just to try and belittle op.

Your suggestion that op is a wench, sums up your spitefulness and agenda from start to finish, really.