male child minder...would you use??

julie2710

Definitely wouldn't have a problem with it! As a single mum of two boys, whose dad is no more use than a chocolate teapot a male influence early in their lives would have been fantastic.

DS1 was having a really hard time if things at about 3-4 and want into a reception class with a male teacher. It was the best thing that e er happened to him. The change in him in just that one year as amazing. I'm absolutely gutted that DS2 won't get the same experience as the teacher has just left. I really wish there were more male childminders and pre-prep teachers. I think they are a real asset.

It's so sad that people are of a mind that they wouldn't trust their children, male or female with a male childminder. What sort of world are we living in where people are bringing their children up in such a mistrusting environment. It really does make me feel very sad.

Also, whilst CRB checks are all very nice, if someone has never been reported for any abuse they will pass with flying colours anyway! Food for thought for all those suspicious minds

neverdespairgirl

I wouldn't choose a male childminder over a female one, or a female over a male. It would depend on whether I felt the person (man or woman) was the right one for my child, and gender wouldn't be relevant.

neverdespairgirl

Kayalana99

I was saying you have to draw the line as in I meant I couldn't be stupid about it and i.e not even leave her Dad with her on his own...I trust my Grandad and my Dad etc with my child(not that I have a DD but I would) but at same time it can still happen..



Statistically speaking, your Dad and Grandad are more of a risk to your child than a CRB checked childminder.

thorsoak

Sadly, fathers, uncles and grandfathers are those who appear to be the most consistent child abusers



I think the biggest risk is step-father / mother's boyfriend, but that doesn't mean all stepfathers / etc are child abusers, f course.

onlyroz

My daughter's nursery has two male members of staff and they're both fantastic. Go for it, if it's what you want to do.

the_pink_panther_2

I understand why OP asks the question, but there are many many factors other than gender alone which would influence my decision, or make me trust someone with a child. You would have to go through the official CRB checks anyway so if people did feel uneasy this should put their minds at rest. It would boil down to who I thought would be most suitable for my child and I see no reason why a guy would be less preferable to a woman for me.

SingleSue

I would have loved it for my boys, especially middle son who liked rough and tumble. Youngest wouldn't have liked it though as he has always had problems with males (even his own father and it took until he was 10 before he would talk to my dad), however, last term, he was given a male TA..not only would he talk to him (he doesn't like talking to people in general), he has got on with him like a house on fire!

Very very unusual and a very talented and understanding TA to get that kind of response from youngest.

amus

ViolaLass wrote: »

I think as long as you recognise that you're being irrational, then it's your choice.

Actually, not irrational if basing ones opinion on statistical likelihood, which put simply, is men are statistically more likely to sexually abuse children than women. Granted, it is more likely to be within the family, but again, outside of the family, it is still statistically more likely to be perpetrated by a male.


This is not to say all men are abusers and no women can be abusers, but it is disingenuous to bring up people like Myra Hindley to imply that women are just as likely to be abusers, because this is simply not the case.


Anyway op, I don't think gender should stop anybody from going for a job they would like to do, the biggest barrier IMO for any childminder starting up would be lack of experience/references, most childminders I have come across have started out in nurseries first. As attested to by this thread, many people would be happy to employ a male childminder with the appropriate experience/checks/references.

notanewuser

amus wrote: »

Actually, not irrational if basing ones opinion on statistical likelihood, which put simply, is men are statistically more likely to sexually abuse children than women. Granted, it is more likely to be within the family, but again, outside of the family, it is still statistically more likely to be perpetrated by a male.


This is not to say all men are abusers and no women can be abusers, but it is disingenuous to bring up people like Myra Hindley to imply that women are just as likely to be abusers, because this is simply not the case.


Anyway op, I don't think gender should stop anybody from going for a job they would like to do, the biggest barrier IMO for any childminder starting up would be lack of experience/references, most childminders I have come across have started out in nurseries first. As attested to by this thread, many people would be happy to employ a male childminder with the appropriate experience/checks/references.

Could you please provide the statistics you are using to back up these assertions?

ViolaLass

amus wrote: »

Actually, not irrational if basing ones opinion on statistical likelihood, which put simply, is men are statistically more likely to sexually abuse children than women. Granted, it is more likely to be within the family, but again, outside of the family, it is still statistically more likely to be perpetrated by a male.

Perhaps, but you and they are assuming that it is likely to happen at all. I hope that poster is also considering the safety of letting their child ever cross the road or get in a car or go swimming or stay over at a friend's house or have a male teacher or or or...

GwylimT

Kayalana99 wrote: »

Got to be honest... wouldn't use a male child minder with a female child.

Would you allow a boy to go to a female child minder? If you had a daughter would you let her father look after her? If you had a son would you not allow yourself to care for him?