Nice People Thread Part 9 - and so it continues

misskool

sorry to hear about mum silvercar, hopefully a solution can be worked out.

lir - brow gel? will look it up. friends just had a semi permanent makeup done for their brows.

vivatifosi

silvercar wrote: »

Finance is another issue. I didn't realise that Dad did everything, so she gets in a state everytime a bill lands because she doesn't know what to do. She also has "money guilt" that Dad worked all his life and now can't enjoy spending his pension/ retirement pot. So she is reluctant to spend anything on herself.
I have offered to help with the finance, but she is very private about their money.

I really feel that if I am going to have sole responsibility, she needs to be near here.

We are taking her with us next week - to the flat overseas for a few days.

In terms of money, could you persuade her to hand over a small amount of money - say a couple of £000s - and run a buffer account for her so that she doesn't have to pay bills, just direct debit some money into it on a regular basis so that it never goes into the negative. Then you could just pay the bills by direct debit from the buffer. If they come to you (or ANO1) then she will never need to see them. It would also mean that if she didn't want to, she wouldn't need to discuss the financial bigger picture.

Might not work, but its something I'm looking at with my parents longer term as bills stress them and they don't trust Direct Debits from big corporations (but would to me).

lostinrates

misskool wrote: »

.

lir - brow gel? will look it up. friends just had a semi permanent makeup done for their brows.

Fir has asked me not to do this (I think would be much easier, I hate drawing them on, its a daily faff). . Does your friend look good? The thing is when it loos good I think you don't notice so cannot ask or a recommendation. When ou notice you know its not where to go.:D. Anyway, Fir says no.


http://uk.spacenk.com/eyebrow-gel/MUK200010052.html?start=5&q=Eyeko

Used over a brow liner

Like this

http://uk.spacenk.com/eyebrow-liner/MUK200011049.html

misskool

they went here

http://www.smudge-free.co.uk/

one only had half brows and it made a vast improvement.

silvercar

vivatifosi wrote: »

In terms of money, could you persuade her to hand over a small amount of money - say a couple of £000s - and run a buffer account for her so that she doesn't have to pay bills, just direct debit some money into it on a regular basis so that it never goes into the negative. Then you could just pay the bills by direct debit from the buffer. If they come to you (or ANO1) then she will never need to see them. It would also mean that if she didn't want to, she wouldn't need to discuss the financial bigger picture.

Might not work, but its something I'm looking at with my parents longer term as bills stress them and they don't trust Direct Debits from big corporations (but would to me).

Your view point is interesting; my view was she needs to gain confidence in dealing with these things.

michaels

One of our Spanish students was 33 and when she arrived she said she and her partner would definitely want kids sometime...fast forward 1 week with our 3 and she said she wasn't nearly so sure....

silvercar

Sorry to hear that.

I have had friends with that problem, that was easily solved with tablets. Could it be that simple?

In answer to chewy, rather than michaels.

lostinrates

Chewy. More cooties I'm afraid.

Of course you are right. And of course there are options.

chewmylegoff

I hope so, I know nothing of course - I think part of the problem is that you have to wait quite a long time just to see a specialist who can tell you. Could be a couple if months in the queue.

lostinrates

That's under the private list, on you employers health scheme?