Problem Neighbour. Thoughts?

RAS

No write to her; two letters sent from two different post offices with free certificates of posting.

This is taken from the letter revoking copmmon law rights to enter property when people are troubled by debt collectors.

Dear xxxx

There is only an implied license under English Common Law for people to be able to visit me on my property without express permission; the postman and people asking for directions etc (Armstrong v. Sheppard and Short Ltd [1959] 2 Q.B. per Lord Evershed M.R.).

Therefore take note that I revoke license under Common Law for you, or your representatives to visit me at my property and if you do so, then you will be liable to damages for a tort of trespass and action will be taken, including but not limited to, police attendance.

Yours faithfully,


Regarding your husband. Irish is a separate ethnic group and if she actually has called him a terrorist or made serious derogatory comments about his origins, he can ask the police to arrest her for racial harassement. It is something along the lines of "make comments that cause distress or harass" but the comment has to be made to him (I think). It does not actually matter whether she thinks what she said was distressing, if he feels distressed by her comments, it is distressing in law.

Saint_Chris

AND she's been in our front garden again this morning to put the recycling box
in, and no doubt been peering in the windows

Get a big piece of cardboard, and write you nosey old bag, on it, and put it in the living room, somewhere she could see it if she looked through your window.

Then see if the complains about that.

As for nasty old people I work day in day out with them, in sheltered accommodation, and some of them are flipping awful, they have zero respect for anyone, then a lovely lady will move it, but believe me once the pack have got her, she becomes one of them and ends up moaning and complaing all the time.

MentalMinnie

Saint_Chris wrote: »

Get a big piece of cardboard, and write you nosey old bag, on it, and put it in the living room, somewhere she could see it if she looked through your window.

Then see if the complains about that.

As for nasty old people I work day in day out with them, in sheltered accommodation, and some of them are flipping awful, they have zero respect for anyone, then a lovely lady will move it, but believe me once the pack have got her, she becomes one of them and ends up moaning and complaing all the time.

Haha! Think that will make things worse, but would be very satisfying!

pipkin71

ska_lover wrote: »

OP..I can understand you are getting upset here, and I can only imagine the impact this is having on your life, but PLEASE think - this old woman (as irritable as she is being) sounds highly likely to have some kind of dementia. Old age dementia is a harrowing topic. One of the neighbours has mentioned she has mental health issues..

This could be you or I one day. God willing it won't be, but you get my point.

My suggestions would be:-

1 - Keep your own diary of incidents for back up when the council contact you. Photograph her in your garden etc. Next time the council contact you tell them that she is showing symptoms of dementia and show them the proof that it is HER hassling you.

2 - Does she have any grown up children that visit her? Speak with them. They need to know what is going on and get involved esp if she is living alone.

3 - Contact social services and explain that this woman is showing signs of dementia, she may need some help?

4 - In the meantime do not give her the time of day, no speaking, no eye contact, if she knocks your door or stands in your garden, get your camera out.

This is what I would do anyway, obviously I am not living it day to day as you are but I do think you need to chill a little and have some perspective - An old lady is stood in her garden in her nightie watching your husband repair his car......just ignore her, it is not something you need to be getting upset over. Do you see what I mean, I don't mean to belittle your situation, but really I do think you are giving this far too much headspace if her standing in her front garden is causing you actual upset.

I agree with this ^^^

pipkin71

marisco wrote: »

I don't buy the poor little old lady with possible dementia take on this at all. To be well known to the police and to have caused upset to several neighbours over a long time period, suggests to me that she is far from being a cuddly, friendly granny type who isn't responsible for her own actions. It is plain odd for someone to stand outside in their nightie and watch someone go about their every day business.

We only have the OP's word on that, though.

Someone with dementia could well go outside in their nightclothes. It is something my friend's mother used to do [although she didn't watch the neighbours].

pipkin71

MentalMinnie wrote: »

She's started to make it obvious that she's watching us, presumably she's keeping a 14 day diary to accompany her noise complaint to the council. She was standing in her window with the curtains pulled back last night watching us.

The only way you would know she was looking at you though, is if you were also looking at her.

I know what it is like when you have problem neighbours as I have lived through it and it isn't nice but you seem to be taking a deal of interest in what your neighbour is doing too.

There are often three sides to what is occurring - yours, hers and the neutral truth.

pipkin71

ska_lover wrote: »

That is the point I am making - that this old lady, whilst making life unpleasant, is hardly a threat and should be treated with empathy. A large proportion of us typing on this thread, will ourselves suffer from dementia one day, and I hope people show a little more compassion if that time comes.

Absolutely.

Beckyy

Do you know if she's on the radar of any of the community care/mental health etc. departments? It could be worth getting in touch to raise a concern about a older neighbour who is causing problems in the neighbourhood.

pipkin71

coolcait wrote: »

One of the advantages of being the 'OP' on any thread is that you are often given the benefit of the doubt.

So, if an OP says that one of their neighbours is the problem, that's often taken at face value.

However, on this thread, the OP has told us about a number of occasions where she and her OH could well have been the 'problem neighbour' in another thread.

Putting on the radio at a high volume, with the windows wide open.

'working on the car' before 9.00 on a Saturday morning. 'Working on the car' can be a noisy activity in itself. If the radio is on, even more so.

Making it clear that she is standing at her front window watching her neighbour (the neighbour could have interpreted the 'waving' in that way, especially if she already feels that the OP is a problem neighbour...).

The OP's defence against the allegation about 'car music' is that the car is 30 miles away, with her husband. Yet, this morning it wasn't.

Does the car start the day and finish the day at the OP's house - with or without music - and then sit in a car park 30 miles away? Or, does the OP's OH - and the car - usually stay 30 miles away from their home.

Did the neighbour explicitly call the OP's husband 'a terrorist'? Is that the 'derogatory remark' which the OP coyly refers to at first? Or, it that the OP's interpretation of the phrase "we don't need his sort of trouble over here"?

I don't think that it's so easy to rule out the possibility that the neighbour genuinely has mental health issues - be that dementia, schizophrenia or something else. Her alleged behaviour does fit in with various diagnoses.

Equally, I don't think that it's so easy to rule out the possibility that the OP and her OH have in fact caused their neighbour some distress - albeit unknowingly.

Nor is it so easy to rule out the possibility that the OP is over-reacting.

Agree with this as well.

Whatever the OP has heard about the neighbour, it is hearsay and it could well be that the OP's neighbour has a grudge against the old woman and is spreading lies about her, which the OP is lapping up, or, it could be that the old lady is the issue as not all old people are sweet and cuddly but although the OP cannot change what the old lady does, she can control her actions and how she reacts to the situation.

pipkin71

Guest101 wrote: »

Just to clarify for the OP, if you do this.

You are perfectly entitled to film anything and anyone, either from your own property (IE stood in your yard looking out) or from (whilst stood in) and public land/street etc.

Neither is this covered by data protection (or anything else people like to say) nor can the police or anyone else tell you to stop.

Equally, the old woman is entitled to stand in her garden too.

Seriously though, if the OP starts taking pictures is that any more acceptable than the old lady standing in her garden?

Why escalate something?

The comment about the husband's nationality was definitely out of order, although I 'think' the reference to her husband being a terrorist is the OP's take on it. I'm not sure the old lady used those words.