7 year old exposed to inappropriate photos? What do I do?

Pechow

I would suspect he already had the photos on his phone, for a few reasons:

-If they're supposed to be asleep, in the dark, he would need to use flash to take a photo. This could wake the son up, isn't exactly discreet, and, ah, would make the subject of the photo look terrible as it would be all bright white from the light so would the piercing I assume
-If you're going to send photos of your bits to people, you'd probably want photos that make them look good, so it's more likely he would have played about before and saved the ones that looked best to later send to people
-I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and hope that he would find it hard to get aroused (if he was erect in the photos)/do such things while in bed next to his own son!

As for knowing it was his Dad's, I'd guess it wouldn't occur to the son that it could have been someone elses/why would his Dad have someone elses?

This is just going on the information given so far, mind you.

peachyprice

sassyblue wrote: »

Did l miss the part where the OP said his willy was erect? How did the son know it was his dads willy on the photo then?

What man would send a photo of a flaccid willy?

If the photo was on his dad's phone I think it's pretty safe to say it would be his dad's, why would he even think that his dad would have a photo of another man's willy on his phone?

paulineb_2

Pechow wrote: »

I would suspect he already had the photos on his phone, for a few reasons:

-If they're supposed to be asleep, in the dark, he would need to use flash to take a photo. This could wake the son up, isn't exactly discreet, and, ah, would make the subject of the photo look terrible as it would be all bright white from the light so would the piercing I assume
-If you're going to send photos of your bits to people, you'd probably want photos that make them look good, so it's more likely he would have played about before and saved the ones that looked best to later send to people
-I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and hope that he would find it hard to get aroused (if he was erect in the photos)/do such things while in bed next to his own son!

As for knowing it was his Dad's, I'd guess it wouldn't occur to the son that it could have been someone elses/why would his Dad have someone elses?

This is just going on the information given so far, mind you.

I think thats fair comment, the pics could have already been on the phone and the son saw them.

Tiddlywinks

Even if the pictures were on the phone, how can the ex feel it OK to be 'sexting' naked photos of himself whilst his son is in close proximity?

How did a 7 year old boy get close enough to the screen to see the detail of the photos without his father seeing that he was awake?

double_mummy

i would stop the kids going over until they have their own beds sorted

i think the next action would completely depend if the pictures were saw on the phone or the dad was taking them with the children there

if seen on phone - talk to dad about a lock on his phone and children about privacy

if taken with children there- discuss with dad why it is wrong if he wont listen then ring the NSPCC for more advice

in both cases i would discuss with the children PANTS http://www.nspcc.org.uk/news-and-views/our-campaigns/current-campaigns/underwear-rule/the-underwear-rule_wda97129.html

and discuss with the school/ any other carers to preempt the kids disclosure as this could be escalated by the school

i would also be more worried if they didnt tell someone at school - the more people they feel they can trust the better in case anything ever does happen to them (not saying dad will abuse them or anything but is good for all children to know about PANTS and have lots of adults that they will talk to)

tinkerbell28

I can tell you 100% it IS a child protection issue.

The fact his Dad, whilst in the same bed has been engaging in sexual activity. Whether he manually became aroused or just took the pictures as it was already there, or pictures were already existent, and he was looking to send.

If your child, goes into school and says what you've said here. Social services would be all over this instantly. So yes it is that serious.

paulineb_2

Id be asking for a chat with the boys dad

Id be making it clear that its time for the kids to sleep in their own bed

And Id also be making it very clear that whether hes having any kind of sex texting with anyone else, the phone is kept well out of reach of the kids

What may or may not have happened is just speculation. I think the dad would need to be a bloody idiot not to realise that taking pics and sending them when his son was in the bed is absolutely inappropriate, but we dont know thats what happened.

Kids can get nosey, the child has looked through his dads phone, seen a pic, repeated it

I think the talk of the father being a !!!!!phile is way OTT and Im not saying dont treat this seriously, Im saying dont jump to the worst conclusion.

But make sure that this doesnt ever happen again, that is absolutely the right thing to do and the dad needs to take responsibility for his stupid actions.

paulineb_2

Im not sure it would be a child protection issue. What happens if a kid walks in on his parents having sex, or finds a !!!!!! magazine, or walks in on his dad in the bath.

There are all sorts of scenarios where kids might see something thats sexual. Or if a child found someones collection of sex toys. Parents have sex, its part of life. Theres a massive difference between someone acting like an idiot and anything worse. Or if your parent came out of the shower and their towel fell? Seeing your mum and dads bits isnt the worst thing in the world, it doesnt mean theres an issue, its the human body.

Its how this happened thats important. Because I bet you there are plenty of adults with filthy pics on their phone, they just have the sense not to let their kids see them. I think the mum needs to find out exactly what happened before anyone goes in all guns blazing.

Hes been an idiot if this happened.

Ive seen people on this forum say theyve sent sexy pics to partners, people do these things, if a child picked up a phone and had a look, thats an accident. Something that shouldnt have happened, but people do take pics and send them to bfs and gfs, the dad should have been sensible enough to lock the phone away.

Chat with the dad first, find out what he has to say and then take it from there before you call the NSPCC or any other organisation.

tinkerbell28

It would be most certainly. Yes kids can accidentally stumble across things, it happens.

The one big difference here.

He was using/taking/viewing delete as appropriate, sexual pictures in the same bed as his child, his child saw.

A child goes in and says that to school, they'd be negligent if they didn't act and query it.

Just awful parenting on his behalf, not necessarily a sexual predator. Just bad, bad choices. Even so, they'd have to act.

Errata

tinkerbell28 wrote: »

I can tell you 100% it IS a child protection issue.

The fact his Dad, whilst in the same bed has been engaging in sexual activity. Whether he manually became aroused or just took the pictures as it was already there, or pictures were already existent, and he was looking to send.

If your child, goes into school and says what you've said here. Social services would be all over this instantly. So yes it is that serious.

If I'm in bed looking at a picture of Richard Gere with no clothes on I'm engaging in sexual activity? I must remember next time to tell myself what I'm doing.