Sorting food budget- seperate for you/OH? how?

Mojisola

lostinrates wrote: »

We'd say the same. Sadly circumstances get in the way. So for us we have a differ pent set up again.

DH works away four nights/five days a week.

He is not lazy or selfish but does work crazy hours, and has to be encouraged to maintain a social life and take care of him self at times!

We budget for his meals as of an extra from 'our' budget. But a very necessary one.

My OH works away a lot, although it varies from week to week, and we also work from a joint budget.

I can understand people not wanting to combine all their money in joint accounts if they'd had previous bad experiences from their or other people's relationships but it's not just a choice between either putting everything into joint accounts or each person paying their own expenses.

However, each to their own. We've chosen the method that suits us. Whatever style of money management a couple choose, it doesn't necessarily say anything about the strength or closeness of their relationship. As long as both people involved are happy with the arrangement, it's their business but it's interesting to hear of the different ways people run their lives.

katie1812

We just pay for everything together. The money I earn is for US, and the same for my husband. So whatever we buy it comes out of our money, including food shop. We both eat the same things, both have breakfast, I make our lunches, and then we have tea. I think it could get very confusing and awkward and possibly cause arguments if it wasn't like this.

Miss_Ratty

If one of us is unable to work for example, we support the other, hence my assumption that the reason why I know so many who do this (and the same for us) is that each in the relationship earns roughly the same. Being in a relationship (married in our case) does not mean we are one person with fused finances. In fact, having been stung twice in the past and made bankrupt as a result, I make sure that finances are kept quite separate. My past finance should not affect my husband. I guess it boils down to what works for each person. But likewise, if the poo hit the fan we both have enough to look after ourselves and each other. I suppose it depends on each person's desire to be independent financially yet stable enough to look after each other when the chips are down. It's personal choice, and even when it comes to my maternity leave, I have ensured that I have enough to contribute my half still, but I guess this wouldn't work where one person earns significantly more than the other.

Georgiegirl256

paulineb wrote: »

Or what would happen if someone developed an addiction to online games, or betting or decided to clean out the joint account and run off with someone else?.

We don't have joint bank accounts, there was never really any need. All the big DD's come out of his account, and I used to transfer across what I could afford to that particular month as my wages varied due to getting commission as well as my basic wages. My hubby earns nearly 4 times as much as I did, so obviously he paid the majority of things, it's always been that way. Then we took turns at buying a 'big shop'.

When I got my redundancy package through, that too was 'our' money and went on home improvements.

lostinrates

Mojisola wrote: »

My OH works away a lot, although it varies from week to week, and we also work from a joint budget.

I can understand people not wanting to combine all their money in joint accounts if they'd had previous bad experiences from their or other people's relationships but it's not just a choice between either putting everything into joint accounts or each person paying their own expenses.

However, each to their own. We've chosen the method that suits us. Whatever style of money management a couple choose, it doesn't necessarily say anything about the strength or closeness of their relationship. As long as both people involved are happy with the arrangement, it's their business but it's interesting to hear of the different ways people run their lives.

We have joint finances, and separate accounts and joint accounts . This is mainly because I want to retain one on my maiden name for trickles of money that still come in occasionally but also for ease of accounting purposes.


Because our weekly routine is regular (though not where exactly he eats) it makes sense for me to budget not for DH to eat out at home for those days, and to allow a planned budget for his eating at work that he may or may not use (depending on work eating demands).

The flexible elements are the ones I find hardest to budget for so I'd find a varying week to week difficult, though I would like the weeks where he was home more and they would surely make up for it.

sharnad

I pay for the food generally, sometimes he pays for his lunch.

lindabelle66

Been reading this thread with interest - i was married for 20 odd years with joint accounts and everything shared. Now im living with a new partner and was stunned to find out that when he was living with his ex, they had seperate food cupboards!!!!

Just cant get my head around it, the ex used to shop for their main meals but he had to buy the stuff for his lunch and breakfasts. They used to have their own biscuits and treats in their respective cupboards and to my knowledge in the 12 years they were together never had anyone round for a meal (other than a takeaway) as it would have caused too many arguments over which one of them would foot the bill!

Now he and i are together i make a contribution towards his bills and buy all the shopping, including his toiletries. I dont make a second thought to him eating more than me etc, we are a partnership afterall.

Torry_Quine

It seems very strange to me that a couple would buy their own food never mind eat seperately! :eek:

neverdespairgirl

Lagoon wrote: »

'If I want to make a big purchase, we sit down and discuss it', really? I find isn't strange that people pool their hard earned money together with someone else's money, and then have to agree how it's going to be spent. If they want something new, because the money is shared they have to get permission to make the purchase.

It's not a question of permission, just discussion. I can't ever think of a single time when either OH or I has brought up the prospect of a big purchase, and the other has refused. It's just a case of a heads-up, here's where we are financially.

In our case, as we're both self-employed, our income is irregular. For example, I did a 6 week trial last year, and then a 3 month re-trial in the same case for Jan to March this year, and haven't got paid a penny yet for any of it, including the weeks of prep. So my receipts over the past year are quite a bit lower than the year before, and a lot less than I've billed. So I've needed OH to transfer more money, more often, for our joint bills.

rebekahR_2

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

That's what I don't understand though... how can separating finances make it easier on the budget? Wouldn't it be cheaper to share meals etc?

Genuine question - no criticism intended.

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I am soft... and cant help but..despite.. fully intending to only buy my own bits end up getting extras..treating and ..end up short.. and then what should of been beneficial me not living separately actually being just as pricey!! (Plus... entirely my own fault my own bad spending habits)

So going to try and really see the benefits this month

I pay my half rent/bills and that's should be that

We don't eat the same food... so ..its always two different plates of food!

Gonna give it a good whirl this month... no exceptions.. food purse..and that's that, no buying odd pints of milk..which I don't drink!!!