i found hidden drugs

mrs_angry

Hi all, im looking for some advice AGAIN
about 15 months ago I found a small bag of white powder in my husbands coat pocket, I asked him what it was and why he had it, and he just said im keeping it for someone else. it wasn't a large amount at all
15 months on and whilst looking for some painkillers in his works bag I found a pill pot which had a small plastic bag in it full of a white powder.
I have taken this bag out of the pill pot and got rid of it and thought I would wait for when he looks for it and finds it missing before I confront him over this.
BUT what would you do if you found a bag of drugs in your husbands work bag? which was obviously hidden. im interested to know because I don't know how to tackle this at all, I am totally against drugs and cant believe my husband would have them in his bag let alone keep yet another secret from me.
thanks for reading it will be good to have some advise because obviously this is messing with my head!
would you keep quiet like me and sit and wait
or would you confront him?

notanewuser

Your husband has a coke habit.

kwmlondon

I'd take it. Find out if it's any good, but then I'm a bit of a liability.

mrs_angry

obviously I thought it could be coke or speed? not sure how I would test that theory though.
I have dabbled but many many years ago so im not really sure what drugs are what nowadays
but I suppose my main issue is why keep this hidden from me?
last time I found the drugs was when I found out he was having an affair with a woman who he worked with!!!!
when I confronted him he didn't seem to want to name the person, so im obviously wondering what the hell is going on!
I guess you really never know someone

paulineb_2

In his work bag? Only you can make the decision about whether you want to stay long term with someone who seems to be lying to you like this.

I certainly wouldnt take anything I found in someones bag, if I thought it were drugs.
I think you need to have a conversation again about whose this is and whether hes using drugs and how you feel about that.

marisco_2

If I discovered that a partner was involved with drugs in any way that would be the end of us. I have seen the damage and utter devastation drugs can cause to peoples lives. Whether your husband is using it himself, dealing or stupid enough to be taking care of it for someone else, I don't think you can just sit tight and do nothing. What if the next thing to happen is that the police raid your home?

fluffnutter

Does it matter if it's coke or speed? Either way, he's using drugs. Why do you think he's keeping it hidden? Not exactly something you'd want to share is it? Unless your OH liked to indulge too.

You need to talk.

stir_crazy

mrs_angry wrote: »

Hi all, im looking for some advice AGAIN
about 15 months ago I found a small bag of white powder in my husbands coat pocket, I asked him what it was and why he had it, and he just said im keeping it for someone else. it wasn't a large amount at all
15 months on and whilst looking for some painkillers in his works bag I found a pill pot which had a small plastic bag in it full of a white powder.
I have taken this bag out of the pill pot and got rid of it and thought I would wait for when he looks for it and finds it missing before I confront him over this.
BUT what would you do if you found a bag of drugs in your husbands work bag? which was obviously hidden. im interested to know because I don't know how to tackle this at all, I am totally against drugs and cant believe my husband would have them in his bag let alone keep yet another secret from me.
thanks for reading it will be good to have some advise because obviously this is messing with my head!
would you keep quiet like me and sit and wait
or would you confront him?

In this instance, I would confront him. He's hiding it from you so he's unlikely to ask you if you'd found something supicious in his coat.

I can understand you being angry, it would be hurtful to find out that your OH was hiding things from you, and I also disagree with drugs. It would be the end of thinkgs if my OH was taking any.

zzzLazyDaisy

What if he never says anything? Will you start searching his belongings, his cupboards and drawers? What if you don't find anything, will you just assume it has all gone away and forget about it? What if he has just got cleverer at hiding the stuff?

What if he does have a habit - where is he getting the money from? That stuff isn't cheap and it has been 15 months on, so he must be well and truly hooked by now.

Or... does he seem to have a lot more money to throw around than he used to? In that case he may be dealing.

Do you think you could ignore what you found and carry on as normal?

EDIT: just read your other post about finding out about the affair last time. Sorry but it does seem likely that if the drugs were related to another woman last time, then there is at least a possibility that the affair has continued/resumed.

Mojisola

You'll have to raise the issue with him but are you going to believe anything he tells you? Can the relationship continue if you can't trust him?

mrs_angry

we too have seen what drugs do to people, we have a 22 year old son who ended up in prison because of drugs and he ruined his life!!!
so im really quite devastated to find out he has been taking drugs himself, if he has, because he doesn't act like hes a druggie!! and keeping them for someone else (whom he wont name) I find that odd too, as we have the same circle of friends, none of who I know take drugs?
part of me wants to confront him, which I know will end in huge arguments, and the other half wants him to find out its gone and that it could only be me, and that I know and he would confront me!
but like you all say its up to me.
I stayed with him after his affair, now I feel like hes a liar all over again!!!!