Feeling lonely

marisco_2

geoffky wrote: »

Minty..My best mate..48 Single never married,
Drinks too much,
smokes far too much weed..
Loves the coke,
Still lives with his mum and dad,
Does not have a car because of being banned for drink driving x2..
Talks bollox after a few.
.Apart from that he is a great guy...
Do you fancy a date?:eek::rotfl:

Is this the latest shock therapy treatment for appreciating the benefits of leading a single life? If so it has worked on me :beer:

geoffky

marisco wrote: »

Is this the latest shock therapy treatment for appreciating the benefits of leading a single life? If so it has worked on me :beer:

The sad thing is,,He is real..:o

marisco_2

geoffky wrote: »

The sad thing is,,He is real..:o

:shocked: I thought you were on a wind up!

[Deleted User]

Least you know he's likely to stay single too. May I ask what your common connection is, when you appear to be a family man?

marisco_2

mintymoneysaver wrote: »

Had a bit of a blip at one point during the day, it just seems to engulf me at times, so off I headed to the bathroom. A 5 minute sob and I was okay again. The stupid thing is that it's all linked to this flirting, and yet he's not someone I have ever fancied in all the time I've known him, and I know we wouldn't be suited at all!

And I'm no lonelier than I have been in the past 15 months, it's not like I'm doing anything less, or got any less company than I've ever had in that time. I almost wish I'd never started it, saved myself all these feelings, but then it's also made me feel so much better about myself too, knowing that I'm still fanciable! Swings and roundabouts, hey?

Hi minty, I hope you're feeling a bit better today and are making the most of this beautiful, hot, sunny weather.

When you flirted with this guy and he responded favourably it was fun, light, easy and enjoyable. It most likely also brought feelings and emotions, that may have lay dormant for a while, to the surface again. A bit of a reminder for you of the nice side of life when you share it with someone. You are astute enough though to recognise that whilst you enjoyed this interaction with your friend, you two aren't really very well suited or compatible.

Try viewing what you shared with this guy as a good experience, that has helped you to feel better about yourself, and enabled you to see that others really like, appreciate and value you just for being who you are. There is also the silver lining that you two are going to remain good friends too. I feel you have come full circle now, and are ready to consider the possibility of dating again, with a new found confidence. That is a real positive.

A relationship shouldn't be what defines your happiness, rather it is an added lovely element to life when you feel happy, secure and content within yourself already. There is no need to rush into anything though. Keep socialising and enjoying life just as you are and look forward to seeing who comes into your life next. If something is meant to be it will happen, in the right time, with the right person, for the best reason

mintymoneysaver

Geoff, I think I'll give that one a miss, though thanks for the offer. i'm worth far more than that!

Bailey, you're right, I am envious. It will be my wedding anniversary tomorrow, and we actually share it with one of the lovely couples ( though not the same year) So tomorrow I know they'll be there, loved up and happy, in their lovely house, talking about their lovely future plans, and I'll be sitting here watching some rubbish on the telly. I wouldn't want ex to ever be back here, it's just horrible that my marriage didn't last the course. I'd love to have a neighbour who I could pop in for a cuppa too. I have good friends, who I know are there for me, but my best friends are miles away ( including the guy, and I can't exactly tell him!) So I have my social nights out, great fun and wouldn't change them, but then I come home. And I never minded that, they all said they wanted to seperate from their husbands if it made them this happy. It's just now it doesn't seem enough...

Marisco, you must be younger than me ( 45) How are you so wise? You always seem to say the right things. I've been miserable today, in all honesty, but that's because I've been to see mother in law in hospital, with an upset father in law who's having to accept that after 58 years of marriage his wife is having to go into a nursing home. Plus thinking about my wedding anniversary too.

Tomorrow's another day though....

marisco_2

Sending you a big (((hug))) minty. It sounds as if today was quite tough going for you. Your parents in law are very lucky to have you around, to support them through what must be an incredibly difficult time in their lives. I cannot comprehend how tough it must be on them to face being parted after 58 years of marriage. I know I would be heartbroken at that prospect myself. I am sure they both appreciated your company very much and all your efforts to help them.

Anniversaries and other special dates can be tough to handle, especially when it is still a relatively short time since you left a marriage. I use to find them really hard but made a point of going out and doing something special by myself on those days. I gave a totally new meaning and memory to each of the dates that were so special to my ex and I when we were together. Now I don't associate any day of the year to what was any more, which makes life a whole lot more pleasant. This takes some time though and I am 7 years on from getting divorced.

You will be in my thoughts tomorrow and I hope you will feel okay. You can always come on here for a friendly natter with everyone if it would help. I hit the big '40' a couple of months back and finally seem to be getting my life in order and growing up. It has taken me a while but the university of life has knocked me in to shape at long last

geoffky

Deleted_User wrote: »

Least you know he's likely to stay single too. May I ask what your common connection is, when you appear to be a family man?

We grew up together,I once shared a house with him and that was until he chased me around the house naked.
I do not drink so nights out with him are out of the question and he knows never to come to mine if he has had a drink as i do not suffer drunks.
He has a heart of gold but,lost his way in life many moons ago..

paulineb_2

mintymoneysaver wrote: »

Geoff, I think I'll give that one a miss, though thanks for the offer. i'm worth far more than that!

Bailey, you're right, I am envious. It will be my wedding anniversary tomorrow, and we actually share it with one of the lovely couples ( though not the same year) So tomorrow I know they'll be there, loved up and happy, in their lovely house, talking about their lovely future plans, and I'll be sitting here watching some rubbish on the telly. I wouldn't want ex to ever be back here, it's just horrible that my marriage didn't last the course. I'd love to have a neighbour who I could pop in for a cuppa too. I have good friends, who I know are there for me, but my best friends are miles away ( including the guy, and I can't exactly tell him!) So I have my social nights out, great fun and wouldn't change them, but then I come home. And I never minded that, they all said they wanted to seperate from their husbands if it made them this happy. It's just now it doesn't seem enough...

Marisco, you must be younger than me ( 45) How are you so wise? You always seem to say the right things. I've been miserable today, in all honesty, but that's because I've been to see mother in law in hospital, with an upset father in law who's having to accept that after 58 years of marriage his wife is having to go into a nursing home. Plus thinking about my wedding anniversary too.

Tomorrow's another day though....

Time you concentrated on what you do have and dont be upset at what you dont have. Easy done but its so easy to get hung up on the things that are missing from our lives and we dont appreciate the things we do have that are good.

If you really do want a relationship then put your efforts into finding one. Its not for everyone but you could give online dating a go, at the very least you might make some new friends, I know several people, all in their 40s or 50s who are dating through online dating, some are living together.

People arent going to bash down your door, you need to meet people halfway.

Sorry about your family issues, sometimes it doesnt rain but it pours and think of it this way, you are celebrating being single, if thats what you want to be, anniversaries are tough, but its just another day, it will come and go and I bet it wont be that bad.

mintymoneysaver

I need to shake myself out of this, it's becoming a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy now :rotfl:Weekends here again, and I'm feeling down again... The week was good, busy at work, saw my sister, out with friends.

But I've woken up this morning, feeling as blue as anything. Out with 4 married women last night, who'll all be busy this weekend ( though they're probably not doing anything more exciting than me!) and I'm convincing myself their lives are so much better than mine.

I've got things to do this weekend, shopping, buying new stuff for my bedroom, but it still seems to be lying ahead of me and it seems a long long time. I really am getting a bit worried about me managing the holidays now, the way I feel at the moment. I don't want to keep blubbing!

I know I'm fortunate, I know I've got some nice things planned ( spa day, facial, holiday, a baptism, visit to friends) and I know that I've always had the holidays to myself as OH worked, so I know I'm being daft. Maybe I've just been so positive and so strong for so long, that now's the time when I'm allowed to feel sorry for myself, just a little bit! Could just have done with it not kicking in when I have 5+ weeks to fill!