The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

kidcat

Thanks Pooky, for us it is a difficult decision as he is very self conscious of his chest and wont swim or take his top off places which limits some social stuff for him. As he is already socially isolated this just makes it worse.
But the idea of major surgery does scare me silly - especially as his care will fall heavily on my shoulders.
The surgeon was clear today that it will be very painful, and of the risks, wish it had been written down though.

Pooky

It's hard when it makes them self conscious, DD2s is just over her heart and has really caused an issue with her bra sizing, we saw a lovely advisor from the mastectomy clinic who arranged for DD to have some inserts for her bra to even her up, we send her bras off and they get pockets sewn in and she can pop in her "chicken fillets".

Shes learning what she can and can't wear (no strapless tops as they don't work) and nothing low cut. She's quite happy to swim but wouldn't sit on the side/sunbathe like it. Trying to find her a prom dress has been a nightmare but she's now found one she's confident in.

It's so hard for them to know how this will effect them in later life. We were told it would be 6/12 weeks complete bed rest after the op, I've no idea how we would have coped with that. Her bar was due to be in for 3 years.

There are lots of online resources for info. We were under GOSH who were fab and gave us tons of literature on it.

kidcat

We have been told 4 weeks bed rest and 3 months no strenuous stuff, his whole side of chest is concave and very noticeable even dressed these days.

Am going to sit and do my research in peace tomorrow, but yes knowing the future would be good.

Has anyone had their house valued for mortgage purposes lately? If I get it valued and if it is worth £3k more than when we bought it, then we get a 3.29 rate for 5 years, or we can just roll it over with no valuation and accept 3.79. Am worried about what the valuation will bring, I cannot make the house look like a show home and am worried it will affect the price.

FairyPrincessk

Evening all,

Nutty, I hope you can take a rest.

SQ is your DH a bit more himself today? Perhaps some low key family time on the weekend.

Kidcat, that does sound a tough decision, especially for a young person to make.

Well, today was the funeral. It was a lovely service and the people closest to lady seemed to find comfort in it. Since I didn't know her well, but OH and his family are her closest relatives it was a bit odd. I've been to many funerals, but never one where I didn't know the person well and it was hard to know the best way to be supportive and yet not too cheerful in the wrong moments. OH's parents seem exhausted and still have so much to do. We refused a lift home off of them as we didn't want to add more on to their journey home when they've so much on and the weather is icy tonight, but they also seemed to want a chat. Hopefully we can have them round for dinner next week and make them something nice for tea and let them put their feet up for a bit.

My cold is still here and here to stay it seems. However, work is still on track and going well so I can't complain too much. I managed to get a tiny bit ahead this morning, which is good as I've had to take an unscheduled part of a day off next week. However OH is on half term so I'll just delegate even more chores to the poor man to make up for it. He really steps in with needed, will have to remember that next time he's left the sugar bowl empty!:rotfl:

Right, I'm off for a cup of peppermint tea and bed. Hugs to all.

Possession

Feel like going to bed myself FP, I've had meetings in London today and it's a long 7 hr trip door to door. My knees don't like all the steps in stations either these days. Still it was good to show my face and discover my colleague is also having similar problems with our boss who seems to have gone a bit power crazy!
sounds like a difficult decision re. DS's op Kidcat.
Miss Pooky, congrats on the car.

kidcat

Possession - good to hear you are not alone in your "boat" hope you have a good nights rest.

Yes pooky - congratulations on DD car.

monnagran

Hi.

Goodness there are some horrible problems being faced here my friends.
Kidcat: this is a dilemma for you. However much your DS wants the op it is you who is going to have the trauma of seeing him through it and out the other side. I think we are all like this with our children, we would much rather have all the pain and grief ourselves than see them suffer. The awful thing is that no-one can do this for you, all we can (and will) do is to be here to support you.

As for Moving Companies, well, one has already withdrawn from the project. Word has obviously got around! Some weak excuse about not having a big enough van. Two more coming round next week to suss us out.

Pooky: I think that's a bit rotten of your DD's grandparents. I remember being told at college that it was always better to give people an unexpected treat than to make a promise and then break it. To disappoint a child (however old) is unforgivable. Anyway, glad your DD now has her car. My eldest DGD is 17 and has just passed her driving test. As she is hoping to go to University in September and won't be earning for a few years I said that she probably wouldn't be looking for a car any time soon. She said that it wasn't the cost of a car that bothered her, it was the insurance and running costs that were ruling it out.

Lovely sunny day here but turning colder. I have relented over the heating and we have had it on - lowish - all day, as we've both been in.

x

kidcat

Monna - can I suggest you contact moving companies in your new area as well, it often works out cheaper that way round (have yet to fathom why) and of course if you have issues with them afterwards they are closer to go to chat to.

greenbee

Monna - I can recommend a decent mover on the mainland They used two smaller lorries to move me out. They thought they'd use one big one to move me back until they saw the entrance to the new place (I had my stuff in storage for 10 days). I can also tell you who NOT to use locally.

Pooky

I must admit the cost of the insurance is rather "ouchy" (£1300!!!!) she will be going to Uni later this year but works part time so can afford to run the car, she will be living at home still and going to the local(ish) Uni. A yearly bus pass is £1100 and will involve a 2 hour commute each day so a car makes much more sense.

She's so excited and already told DD2 how much she'll charge her per mile if she wants lifts