The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

Popperwell

Yeah, I'm ok :)thanks, unforeseen accidents and all that. It just fell over and I was in the wrong place. Got off lightly though.

EstherH

THANKS MRS CHIP: might have to rethink this as we don't like marmalade, but I suppose if I changed the quantities to twice as much apple as orange peel it would be ok?

Esther x

PRINCESSX87

So I received a call back and have been told that I will receive therapy in the form of CBT and counselling. I will be looking for more information on CBT on the internet later this evening as I’m not too sure what it actually is. I’ve heard a lot of people refer to it as “great” but I’m not confident at present. Because there is a long waiting list, I dont have a appointment as yet, But, I have been told I’m on the top of counsellors list.

Another plus point is that the venue is right on my door step. Normally you have to travel a fair distance the lady on the phone told me. But its easier for me to get too because of my fear of the outdoors. Therefore I can take my OH along and he can nip next door for a costa (No very O/S I know.)

Pinkdebster

Hi everyone,

Not been posting but still following regularly. Been feeling terrible - am sure the depression is back with a vengeance as I just can't be bothered with anything. The hospital are pushing me to have more surgery but can offer no odds that it will even work so I'm reluctant. I just don't seem to be able to think straight at the moment. This of course means I'm doing very little each day - no uni work, no housework etc., so then I end up each day hating myself for being so lazy and doing nothing....and so it goes on. But I have an appointment at the doctors tomorrow so hopefully he'll be able to increase the ADs or make some other suggestions. Sometimes the whole health stuff just gets on top of me.

Anyway, my reason for posting - Princess, I undertook a course of CBT and found it really useful. For me, it focussed on teaching me to accept I had a life-altering illness as I was still raging against it and yearned for my old life. What CBT does is offer you alternative ways of thinking - say for example I went to a session and said "my OH must be really angry that I'm doing nothing and thinks I'm lazy". The therapist would say to me "Are you a mind-reader? How do you know that's what he's thinking? Maybe he is thinking he wishes he could do more to help you?" - that kind of stuff. This is just one example - there are lots of other ways it helps you but it does focus on changing your thoughts in order to change your behaviour.

I have to be honest and say it was one of the very best things I have ever done - until I took the course, I didn't realise how much I hadn't accept the feeding tube and everything and was still internally railing against it all. You usually get a little homework to do (nothing major!!!) which you work on between sessions. Go with an open mind and hopefully it will help you as much as it did me.

Love and hugs to everyone else - a special hug to Mrs C for her loss.
Debbie xxx

monnagran

Hi.

Gailey: I had one like that. Creosoted the car, painted the new living room carpet with white gloss paint (how did he get the top off? I couldn't.) took an antique clock to pieces to 'mend' it, stripped off the baby and powdered him with Harpic (kept on the top shelf of the airing cupboard so he couln't reach it!) tried to parachute out of his bedroom window with a plastic carrier bag. It sounds as if I spent my time reading and not watching him. On the contrary, if he was quiet for 2 minutes I ran like a bat out hell to see what he was up to. How he has survived to be 44 I will never understand.

I'd like to say that it gets better. I'd like to but I'd be lying! The problems change, that's all

x

Mrs_Chip

PX and Pink - I posted this link before

http://www.llttf.com/ and someone else posted this

https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome

Both are free and our old doctor referred OH to use them when he needed a bit of help. May be useful until you get anything from your area.:)

Popperwell

Hmm, I had a feeling that might be what CBT may be. I hope it works for anyone about to consider it and glad it seems to have worked for you Pinkdebster. I hope that you get some satisfaction after your appointment with your Dr.

I treated myself, if that's the right word, to two new knives to help prepare meals but wasn't prepared to spend lots of money so just got some value ones, a general cooks knife, a small vegetable one. Together I only spent £2.15 and I found a plastic ladle for 50p.

I may have little hair but have had a hair cut, only took 5mins and cost £5.50 but I can make one last 3-4 months until the next:)she trimmed my eyebrows:p:rotfl:No one has ever done that before.

My garden is coming on well. It should be all sorted for Winter. The weather was horrible when he was here but this afternoon it has much improved. So if he returns tomorrow as planned hopefully it will be kinder and all will be finished.

kidcat

Evening toughies, I have been trying to keep up but internet signal isnt brilliant.

Gailey - I have two who were/are like that, DS9 still can destroy a battleship given two minutes tops. We have had so many floods etc I am now like a well oiled machine when it happens. The good news is hopefully your little one will grow out of it - but as Monnagran says he will bring different problems - its the joy of parenting.

I am exhausted and stunned that we are away, and I am dealing with the kids totally solo, DS9 has struggled today and DS15 found Portsmouth HIstoric Docks too crowded, but we did it and lived to tell the tale.

OH has let DD19 down every morning and she has ended up getting taxis to her bus stop, he hasnt been home on time either so she has had to cope entirely alone.

DS15 had CBT last year but after two rounds they said it wasnt going to be any use as he has no comprehension of what they were saying - other people I know have really benefitted though so definitely worth a try.

Right I have to get kids bedded, we are off to Brighton tomorrow - the Choccy Wokky Doodah shop is calling

ArthriticOldThing

Goodevening. I lost a long post earlier this evening so gave up in a sulk and hadHM rice pudding as consolation. :mad::mad: Ready to try again now but am typing it in Wordfirst.

Pops: I don’t know where you live but Iam based on the clifftop and have a view directly across the mouth of theriver. It’s a magnificent view at any time but when we have storms it is justspectacular. The waves sometimes rear twice the height of the piers before theycome crashing down.:eek: Makes me worry for the little fishing boats out in it. You’dbe welcome to view anytime.



Gailey. Oh the joys of small boys!!!:rotfl: I hadone as well – two actually, but one was much more inquisitive and destructivethan his brother. I got used to floods, broken anything, sudden electricshorts, and the dismantling of whatever I could not hide well enough. Hisbrother just emptied the contents of the fridge at every possible opportunity.:eek:Both in thirties now. As monnagran says,the problems just change the older they get.



PrincessX87: I am currently on my 7thweek of CBT and finding it really useful – as pinkdebster has said. When my GP referred me I did not have muchhope but as AD’s were not really doing anything thought would give it a try. My therapist is also offering alternative waysfor me to look at things and help me be aware of some self-destructive patternsin my life. Definitely worthwhile.:)



Kidkat I think you are amazing. :TDon’t know how youmanage to do all you do. Hope you enjoy Brighton. The one time we went (allfour of us) we got lost but had a great time finding our way back.

Molly41

MrsLurcherwalker wrote: »

Hello MOLLY how is everything with you and the family now? Hope that DD has found her feet at uni and is really enjoying herself, that your Dad is on the mend after his stroke and that you are beginning to pick up healthwise after your op. Poor Molly puppy, I'm dreading the firework season as poor Docky is a wreck for as long as it goes on, and it seems to go on for longer each year doesn't it? We've tried everything to help him, the pheremone plug in, the sounds scary cds, the sedation and none of them has made the slightest bit of difference to the poor old fella, all we can do is be in the study with him as it's his 'safe' place and he gets under the table on a pile of old towels and have the music as loud as we can comfortably bear it and we just have to weather the whole annoying season. Still, I can remember how exciting Bonfire night was as a littlie but it was usually only the 5th and the weekends either side of it that had firework noise back then, now it goes on for months doesn't it? Hope Poppy and Molly fare as well as they can and everyone elses canine pals too, Cheers Lyn xxx.

Thank you for asking after me. We are just plodding on and coping as best we can at the moment. I am trying not to get cross at myself as I have so much to do.

Hugs for a good night x