The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

patentgirl

Time has run away with me again looks like I missed a lot
Kidcat that is awful can't believe it your poor DS
Possession hope the CV goes well for the job
Just settled DD3 in her new house at uni £325 just her share in a house with no bills unbelievable really.

Pooky

Evening all

Kidkat - that's dreadful, does it have a knock on effect with his college place?

Fuddle - Hope you can get the knee sorted - I had dreadful issues with one of mine for years then saw a knee man - he pushed, pulled and told me that my knee was partially dislocating....he explained with a pretend knee, told me how to solve it and how to strap it up and I did what he suggested - good as new! But for years I was told is was just an age thing and to live with it!!

Patent - £325 is good - where's she studying? DD1 had a fit of the sulks at the weekend that she wasn't getting to go "do" the living at uni experience this year and decided she would find a house share.....we humoured her (we'd already been through the sums)....the cheapest she could find was £405 a month for a very dodgy tiny room, it would leave her with £109 per month to live on....which she said was utterly doable......until I reminded her of her phone contract and the books she needs.....let alone food, travel, toiletries.....she's changed her mind again now.

Been very busy with my parents being here, today was a walk along the beach and local area where Dad grew up, ice creams and cockles next to the sea and lots of cups of tea......we then came home and I cooked a roast.....I'm craving some pasta or chilli or rice or something other than potatoes and meat! Tried to teach mum how to do the ripple crochet but as I'm a leftie she couldn't follow what I was doing and I couldn't work out what she was doing right handed.....needless to say we gave that one up!

judi24

Good news Possession about the jobe being part time - I hope you get it!
Kidcat that is a nightmare about your son - I hope the chaos settles and you find a way forward!


I have had an eventfull day - had a productive meeting in DS school and he has a support plan in place now - which should help! the deputy head tried to explain ADHD to my ex and he seemed a little more accepting that this might be the cause of some of my DS's problems but he's still playing games!
DD3 had had another meltdown about the 11+ and I really dont think she should sit it - but I don't want her to blame me for stopping her or for her to think she is not as good as her brother and sisters cos she didn't go to a grammar school! - at the same time I dont think the grammer is the right school and I don't think she will handle the pressure if she got in!!!
Work is horrible - just over 2 weeks to go til I leave but there are rumours about the restructure that would suggest I have been 'forced to leave' - if that is the case I will consider putting in a grievance but i am not sure its worth the stress!
What I really need is a good nights sleep - but woke at 5 again this morning! any way positive things today are my gas and electicity DD has been reduced from £185 to £165 and month! and I found out that my ex bought an extended warranty on a camera he gave me 3 years ago - which is still indate so going to take camera back and get a replacement (broke about 12months ago!) - thats what comes of procrastinating doing any uni work by cleaning out the study!!!

kidcat

Pooky - DD is making similar noises this year, I have said if she chooses to go take up a house share near Uni, we will continue to pay her phone bill but that we cannot afford any rent etc and that her room will be reallocated to DS and she will have to have the small room when she comes home. She isnt impressed as her friends all have parents footing the bills, we simply cannot afford it though.
As for DS yes this affects his college place, he will have to change course and resit the exam, a timetable that was manageable for us transport wise is now incredibly hard and involves DD8 being in both after school and breakfast clubs. College have been great and very helpful but they have minimum requirements and he simply no longer meets them.

Fuddle good luck with the knee, my friend has similar issues and is ignoring them, I am trying to persuade her to have it checked.

Judi - so glad school were helpful, as for DD maybe that you need to simply give her the choice over the exam and school etc but also give her the pros and cons of the different schools

judi24

Kidcat and Pooky I went through the same with my DD1 she stayed away for the first year and came home year 2 and 3 but wanted to do a flat share in her final year - I said i couldnt help and got the 'all my frined have parents that pay this and that!' she ended up staying! Now has moved accross the country for a job and is in total shock about how little she has left after bills etc!!! and she is earning £21k! Its hard cos you want them to have a good experience of being in uni but it is just so expensive!!!

mardatha

I did it, it is quite easy even in Win8. I forgot how though lol... somewhere it says "export to pdf" and you just click that.

savingqueen

A good morning to you all

Wishing any poorlies better - hope your knee is better fuddle and your cold FairyP today.

What a nightmare with the exam and college kidcat. I know you will all get through it but the school mucking up like that is inexcusable.

Good luck with the last weeks on old jobs and good luck with new jobs and job applications - few peeps on here.

Sorry to hear about your friend Possession - being there to give her support is what friendship is all about. Good she has you to help her through it.

NurseM - thanks for sharing your cancer story. I don't want to use too many "cancer clich!s" IFYKWIM, I can't possibly know what it really feels like to be in your shoes (though have family members who have had cancer.) Even so woman like you ARE inspiring and help me to pull myself up when I am down in the dark pit of depression.

So happy to hear about your mad weekend monnagran - well deserved for you and the Rev. A holiday on the cards too yahoo!

My empathies judi on the 11+ - I have a similar situation with DS10. He had a meltdown at the weekend too. To be fair he was very tired after a party on the Sat eve and being a typical kid didn't lie in after. He was practising one the mock tests, his idea (he hasn't done a lot of practise, all kept very low key) and ended up under the kitchen table sobbing his heart out. His last report was the "worst" ever - a decent report but hardly any progress and I know from the practice at home that his chances are very slim at best. He will get stressed doing it (and a couple other selection tests) BUT if I suggest he doesn't try, he will think he isn't good enough and that will affect his confidence. Stuck between the devil and the deep blue sea. Dreading the start of the open days and tests beginning this Sat. Expect a frazzled SQ for about 6 weeks on here..... sorry guys in advance.

DS10 was rude to both me and DS7 this morning and on hearing his punishment ( no screens tonight - this was the start of the bad behaviour) he ended up stomping off to school with a face like thunder and no goodbye to me. DH is on day 3 of his holiday and hasn't done anything with me - either in terms of sorting out jobs in the house or spending quality time with me. He did have a tooth extracted on Mon but I am still a bit miffed with him. When I had my tooth out I had to drive myself there and back and then pick the kids up an hour late and get on with things. If today is a repeat I will not be impressed. There is nothing more annoying than someone who moans about the noise you are making doing chores (and I am not taking hovering just quiet stuff) when they are glue to the sofa watching films. Gotta use a rare :mad:.
Apart from that I am actually in a good mood, sun is shining and just had toast and peanut butter.... I know its fattening but its oh so yummy especially with real butter as well and a big cup of milky coffee. Off to do some more chores whilst His Lordship slumbers on... should I do the ice bucket challenge on him?


xxxxx

FairyPrincessk

Morning all,

Feeling properly rotten today, hopefully Fuddle is feeling better.

Kidcat, and all of those dealing with 11+ or other exam stress, big hugs. I could lament the ridiculous pressure these systems put on children, or I could go into a rant about them...but all I will say is that it does usually seem to work out in the end. Buck your kids up, tell them that exams are not the be-all-end all, that doing courses at their own pace is just find and remind them that academic achievement is not all there is to having a healthy, happy life. From what I know of you on this board, you are all fabulous parents. From what i know of first year Uni students, I will say a loving foundation and nurturing their confidence and curiousity gets them a lot further than good exam results once they hit my classroom. I would venture to say it is probably similar in pathways other than Uni. Hard to go against the grain though.

SQ I'd jokingly vote for a nice loud vaccing session between your OH and the telly...but maybe you should just plainly (and gently) tell him what you expect of him on his week off. A wise man used to regularly remind me that men aren't always taught to be as attuned to guessing what others need as women are.

OH is working quite late tonight for a relatively pointless event. Normally I like to be very supportive of school events and the like, but this one is outright ridiculous. The poor teachers are all trying to get to know the pupils and keep the term off to an enthusiastic start, the parents are trying to get into a routine and the kids (Y7) shouldn't be at an event at school at 9pm on a school night in my view...poor planning on the school's part, especially as the teachers have said there really isn't any real information to relay so soon after the last event (a week and a half ago!). Unfortunately they announced the event before they consulted the teachers....someone must have really thought that one through!

Never mind, I will have some soup and get some ironing done, and OH can catch up on work between the end of football practice and the start of the event.

Right, back to work. I'm taking a break today to do a few errands, lemons for hot honey and lemon, restocking my supplies of cold remedies and some milk.

I hope those of you who lurk or haven't popped in today are all feeling well and happy today.x

monnagran

Hi,

Kidcat: I would be livid about DS's wrong grade if I were you. Have the school offered any help, apart from a lame apology? I don't think schools realise the impact this has on peoples' lives. I know because a similar thing happened to my DS2, years ago. He went off to register at college proudly bearing his GCSE results - it was the first year of GCSEs - only to find that the school had told him the wrong minimum grade for maths and he hadn't quite made it. It took him a long, long time to recover. But he then found a job that he adored so all was well in the end.
As for your DD, well, she won't realise or appreciate it now but she is having a very valuable reality check. When the money isn't there you have to cut your cloth accordingly. Bit of a mixed metaphor there, but ykwIm. It's hard for her but she will realise eventually that you can't perform miracles and produce money out of thin air.

Judi: Sympathies to you too. It was much easier in the days when there was no choice about whether you took the exam or not.

NurseM: I have just gone back and read your story again. I have made a note of where it is and intend to refer back to it whenever I am feeling hard done by. You are one incredible person and there can't be many who are as strong and brave as you are. I have the most awesome respect for you. x

SQ: Oh dear! I can only repeat what others have said. The stress put on these children is intolerable. They shouldn't be made to feel failures if they are not academically gifted. I used to tell my children at school that if they have a leak in the pipes and water pouring through the house, they will not be wanting a Professor of Classics or an International Banker turning up. But if a plumber with his bag of tools knocks on their door they will welcome him (or her) in with cries of joy. In any case, the plumber will likely be earning more than a Prof. of Classics.

As for your DH, I'm with FairyP. A long, noisy vacuuming session around him and under his feet is called for, followed by a vigorous shaking of cushions, dusting of ornaments, and possibly cleaning of windows, especially if it's a bit chilly and they have to be opened wide. What does he think you do all day?

FairyP: Sorry you are feeling rotten. Having a cold seems worse in the nice weather somehow. Better in the winter when you can wrap yourself up warm and sniffle in cosy comfort. Hope you feel better soon.

Fuddle: Hope it is good news about the knee and something can be done to make you more comfortable. You need all your strength and everything working painlessly to do a job like yours.

x

cornishchick

Hi all ,
Shah don't want to say this out loud in case the work phone rings with some crisis .. But ... I have 5 whole days off work... Now I'm I resting.. Not today lol if only.. I have work men in sorting out my loft . Super duper insulation and a safe sturdy loft ladder, so I can finally sort out all of my late DH " treasures .. Tons of paper and who how's what.
That's today and tomorrow. Hoping to finally see. Doctor on Friday about my dodgy elbow and wrist. I've been treating it as if it's tennis elbow but no home remedies have really helped.
I also need to batch cook for a couple of days as my supply of HM ready meals has dried up. And still sorting out the hords of other stuff from DH.
Had my daughter in hospital, she was finally diagnosed with PID and endometriosis . So been supporting her.

So I've decided I must be a really wicked person as I never get any rest


Wish I had a big box of strength to hand out to everyone along with a glass of something and a good cake,
But the best I can do is say, hugs and we are all here for one another.

Sharing is a way of halving your troubles and doubling your strength, x

X C C