The Ultimate Incentive part 10. The only thing holding you back is you.

clearmydebts

Hope all is okay with you Dinah and NIM. The christening photos were really lovely x

ruby_eskimo

*knock knock* Do you all mind if I pop in?

I know it's been a while, things have just been a bit crazy with life and that left minimal internet time! Nothing major really; started my "new" job and it's been so busy, joined a very active (and lovely) book club so I have new friends to hang out with and we're actually in a position to start properly wedding planning soon! Hope everyone is doing well, will try and catch up with things!

Birdie85

Hey Ruby! :wave: Nice to 'see' you back here! Glad things are going well and you're back to planning the wedding! Are you still getting married abroad?

How was everyone's weekend? We went to see Despicable Me 2 and had a couple of meals out (have to enjoy things like this whilst we can!) and I spent a lot of time lying around whilst OH carried on with his cleaning/sorting/tidying mission. We'll have nothing left by the time the baby arrives! I have to admit that it's all looking great, even though I have no idea where anything is now!

clearmydebts

Hi Ruby. Lovely to see you back again

Max went to see Despicable Me 2 as well Birdie, with his aunt, uncle and cousin. Apparently they were impeccably behaved. Street angel, house devil lol!

Yes - get to the cinema lots before baby arrives. Although I find that the opportunity to go out is way more than people lead you to believe. It's just that when the baby is newborn you don't want to leave them. And even now, sometimes I can't be bothered to go out even though there is a babysitter.

Right Dinah and NIM - I am starting to worry about you both. Just a little one-liner to say everything is A-Okay please!

wendz86

Morning,

Lovely weekend here. Did some shopping Saturday and then spent yesterday in the garden.

I think it depends on how much help you have with going out etc. We don't have any family nearby so is a bit more tricky for us to go out especially together. OH's shuft working doesn't help either. I have only been to the cinema once in the last 2 years! Also with bfing i couldn't leave her for long when she was small but to be honest i didn't really want to! You have family nearby though Birdie so i am sure you will have lots of willing babysitters!

Would love to hear how Dinah and NIm are getting on too.

Dinah93

Hey everyone, sorry for going a bit awol, got super busy with the Christening and then I just got a bit head down and 'lets do this' and didn't want to put my time into anything that wasn't a 'priority' for a few days. I've also been thinking a lot about if there will be a second baby given my previous experience and I wanted to be in a baby free place for a few days. It's done me good, for the first time I'm able to just enjoy every minute with Grace rather than always thinking about her in terms of her health and what I'd do differently next time. I've always wanted 3 or 4 kids so the idea that maybe Grace is it unless we decide to adopt (which would probably have to be international given the issues I've had with anxiety and depression) has been a very strange idea to think about and consider getting my head around. We're still not remotely decided about it though, I just think yes it could go better, but I can't count on that, and if it goes worse loosing a child or having a severely disabled child is going to have a big impact on Grace's family life and that's not fair to her or to potential child 2. Wow, that really wasn't the introduction I had planned in my head.

The good news is taking time off to focus on our current priorities has worked, and we've paid a fairly phenominal £3489.67 off the debt since June 1st.

Got my student loan end of year letter yesterday, annoyingly it says I made no payments from self assessment and doesn't have any of the payments on I did make from my wages. It drives me batty how ineffectual they are, despite sending them my marriage certificate and covering letter to say I've moved twice they still send everything to mum and dads house. They're also threatening to take my brother to court as they think he was overpaid, despite mum posting the information to them twice, and then actually physically taking it to the office as they claimed not to have received it despite it being sent recorded delivery both times!

Birdie85 wrote: »

Having a bit of a stress over what to wear for the vintage fair. Was thinking about dressing up one of my 50s style dresses that I've already got but none of them fit over my giant bloated belly now, saw a really pretty Betty Draper style dress on ebay that I could buy in a size bigger but not too sure how it'll fit and I'm trying to avoid anything with a waistband right now for sheer comfort reasons so I just don't know what to wear and with having to buy loads of new clothes now I don't really want to be spending too much on a possible one-time-wear outfit?!

I might have something for you. I found a big box of vintage clothing and fabric when I was sorting out the attic last week, I'll see what I have in a bump friendly size and send you some pics?

Really sorry to worry you all about mum, she was discharged from hospital as they said they wouldn't do a scan any quicker as an inpatient, so we're still waiting on mums outpatient scans to see if it is kidney stones or just an infection. Good news is she hasn't had any more pain since that time so with a bit of luck it was just an infection and the anti-biotics worked.

Christening went great, was lovely to have all our friends and family in one place. The bbq part was a bit challenging in the driving rain, but we made it work in the end.

Grace has had a cold for a few days now, so a bit huffy and puffy, but I'm managing to keep the anxiety under control as she seems to fight them off quite well. She is a lot more cuddly than usual which I have to admit I'm enjoying.

Flower08 wrote: »

:rotfl: I am amazed that I managed to get to 12 weeks without anyone knowing, I was that bloated!

I didn't - I announced in the office and the entire admin team grinned and told me they knew as they'd been able to see the difference since about 9 weeks despite me wearing loose shirts, plus I'd been off work on two occassions between blood pressure and throwing up my guts, and then several appointments as well.

tinkerbel wrote: »

What lovely presents! Did grace get anything special/lovely at her christening D?

She got quite a few nice books, thomas the tank book collection, winnie the pooh collection, each peach pear plum with building blocks, a childrens illustrated bible etc. She also got a few money boxes and a lovely brush and comb set.

Birdie85 wrote: »

How was everyone's weekend? We went to see Despicable Me 2 and had a couple of meals out (have to enjoy things like this whilst we can!)

It's really not as bad as you think, we took Grace to loads of cafes and restaurants in the summer last year, she either just slept in the pram or cuddled on my knee, and now shes a bit bigger she loves going out socalising, she likes to see new things, chat to people, try new foods, she's been out on a groupon curry last night (bit challenging actually as they didn't have a high chair), and to chiquitos on Friday as we were celebrating paying so much off the debt, and she ate more than she has for weeks, lots of smiles, it's nice that we don't feel like we're dragging her along, but that she really gets a lot out of the experience (including a balloon in this case which made her positively gleeful).

NIMs first day at his full time job today, nice to be starting a more stable routine again although it's also been good having a bit more flexibility and family time.

Grace is growing up fast, crawling and generally moving very easily now, can pull to stand and cruise although no walking yet. This morning she managed to get herself into the kitchen while I was getting some socks, then sat with her back against the door so I couldn't get in! Had to wait ages for her to give up the game and move herself.

Will try to post more often now I'm back, and again really sorry for worrying anyone.

Dinah93

Dinah93 wrote: »

So, one of the things I plan to do is address at the start of the month where I want to be at the end of it. So, by 30th June I'm going to:

[STRIKE]1. Have a complete, up to date list of all our debts[/STRIKE]
2. Have finished transferring all our direct debits to the 123 account Not done, need paperwork off NIM
[STRIKE]3. Have reduced the debt from where it is on June 1st [/STRIKE] £3489.67 less, proud.
4. Have finished the blog restyle Ongoing, have had to call in help as I can't work out how to get the old background off!
5. Have written at least 5000 words of my ebook Gutted to say I've written about 8000 words, and word has crashed and corrupted the file not once but twice. I was nearly in tears over it yesterday
[STRIKE]6. Feel on top of our home[/STRIKE]Largely. I'm happy with how tidy it is but there is a MASSIVE amount of ironing to do as the iron gave up the day we came back from Greece, I gave it to a friend to mend, it came back and broke again within a minute, so I've had to order a new one and it's not here yet
7. Have completed a complete profit-loss budget for our household finances for the past 6 months, and for future scenarios based on different employment options Not yet, need NIMs help to do the spreadsheet
[STRIKE]8. Have evaluated objectively NIM and I's life priorities to make purposeful decisions moving forward, rather than automatically following the obvious or assumed path[/STRIKE] Proud of this one, although following through on it is harder
9. Have requested all of Grace and I's medical records from the hospital Requested, forms filled in, just need to find a cheque book to pay for it

A mixed bag but I feel it's a success given how much debt we cleared.

Dinah93

So, July.

1. Get 100 things out the door through ebay, music magpie, charity etc, just de-junk a bit more.
2. Have finished transferring all our direct debits to the 123 account
3. Have reduced the debt from where it is on July 1st
4. Have finished the blog restyle
5. Have written a first draft for the whole book
6. Feel on top of our home
7. Have completed a complete profit-loss budget for our household finances for the past 6 months, and for future scenarios based on different employment options
8. Have cleared the 'to do' paperwork drawer, preferably by doing it not binning it!
9. Loose 5lbs.
10. Finish building and launch dad's website.

wendz86

Glad all is ok Dinah.

Is a big decision about future children but sounds like you and thinking very sensibly about it.

Grace sounds such a cutey. I love all her pictures, she has the most gorgeous eyes.

Hope NIMS first day at work goes well.

Meant to say Birdie, i oredered that winnie the pooh book set for christening on sunday.

Tete_en_l'Air

Hi Dinah, lovely to hear from you and glad all is OK with your Mum. The christening photos on Facebook were lovely, hope everyone appreciated the fancy cups! Well done on clearing so much debt so far too. Remind me what NIM's new job is ... I feel a bit out of the loop at the mo...? Good luck to him anyway on his first day!

Hi everyone!