Neurolinguistic programming

securityguy

RAS wrote: »

I think visually and can see solutions before I can frame words. The senior person objected to my failing to listen to her. I realised her mode was auditory

Oh goody: learning styles. It's like a charlatan house of cards, with one piece of pseudo-science nonsense (NLP) built on top of another piece of pseudo-science nonsense ("learning styles").

neverdespairgirl

RAS wrote: »

Maybe that just indicates that more studies have been done of the efficacy of CBT because it is the flavour of the month and that is what people can get research grants for?

Endless studies have been done on NPL. They all showed it was b0llocks.

timbo58

As with everything on here & in life if you wish to form an opinion: do some study and make your own.

There are probably many fans of NLP on here (Not NPL btw), I don't think it works for all, but it seems to work for some by the reports I have read.
I think there ARE some good points in NLP: certainly the positive thinking aspects are beneficial without side effects or negatives.

I think that some simply don't like what they see as 'brain washing' per se.

top_drawer_2

Hey,

I'm very interesting in the subject of personal development and read a lot on the topic. I've just bought a book called Emotional Intelligance for Dummies and its proving to be very useful. I am finding it ticks all the boxes in helping me to deal better with people.

If you search my previous threads you'll find one re Regression therapy as I asked on here if anyone had any experience. I got very few positive responses too, overall though I realised I was looking for a quick fix which wasn't going to happen.

TD

gwen80

top_drawer wrote: »

Hey,

I'm very interesting in the subject of personal development and read a lot on the topic. I've just bought a book called Emotional Intelligance for Dummies and its proving to be very useful. I am finding it ticks all the boxes in helping me to deal better with people.

If you search my previous threads you'll find one re Regression therapy as I asked on here if anyone had any experience. I got very few positive responses too, overall though I realised I was looking for a quick fix which wasn't going to happen.

TD

Thanks TD. I still need to reply to other posts in this thread but I'll look into the book you suggested.

Did you try Regression therapy in the end or not? I've been reflecting a lot recently on my life and how I want things to be in the future. I've made a preliminary list of skills I'd like to improve on. There are more (I have so much work to do!) but I think these are the most urgent:

Confidence/self esteem
Social skills
Time management
Self discipline
Living less emotionally (i.e. when something has upset me not being upset for two days and it affecting how I get on with life)

Gwenx

top_drawer_2

gwen80 wrote: »

Thanks TD. I still need to reply to other posts in this thread but I'll look into the book you suggested.

Did you try Regression therapy in the end or not? I've been reflecting a lot recently on my life and how I want things to be in the future. I've made a preliminary list of skills I'd like to improve on. There are more (I have so much work to do!) but I think these are the most urgent:

Confidence/self esteem
Social skills
Time management
Self discipline
Living less emotionally (i.e. when something has upset me not being upset for two days and it affecting how I get on with life)

Gwenx

I didn't try it. I was hoping to go for psychotherapy again but on 07/04 I fell and fractured both my wrists. I had to move back into my parents and am still there. Much of my problem was that I hated living where I was, with a nightmare landlady and despite putting lots of effort into looking for something else things just kept falling through/not working out.

Your list is very close to my own.

TD

Idiophreak

gwen80 wrote: »

I'm trying to improve myself a bit at the moment. I want to improve my communication and build better relationships with people. I'm fine at work, but I struggle with my relationship with my Mum (who can be very overbearing) and at times, I feel like my relationship with my friends and brother could be better.

I'm with most other people on this thread regarding NLP, but I have to say, the idea of using it in a personal rather than professional context is particularly worrying.

"you're feeling very positive about me today...I'm a good friend...you want to spend time with me...and maybe buy me...waffles!"...the idea gives me the creeps a bit.

(yes, I know I'm kinda oversimplifying NLP a little...but only a little )

Lilith1980

Have you thought about counselling? If your relationship with your mother and others isn't what you'd like it to be, then talking these things through with a counsellor (who is trained to be non-judgemental, empathic and neutral) might be of help?

And yes, I am a counsellor, but no, I am not touting for business lol, just making a suggestion

Plus, I have also had extensive therapy myself and it's been a huge help to me in terms of my relationships with my family.

gwen80

Lilith1980 wrote: »

Have you thought about counselling? If your relationship with your mother and others isn't what you'd like it to be, then talking these things through with a counsellor (who is trained to be non-judgemental, empathic and neutral) might be of help?

And yes, I am a counsellor, but no, I am not touting for business lol, just making a suggestion

Plus, I have also had extensive therapy myself and it's been a huge help to me in terms of my relationships with my family.

To be honest I hadn't thought of counselling. I have/have had OCD, anxiety and depression, all now largely under control. Because of that, I've had extensive therapy too. I've done CBT, ERP and cognitive analytical therapy.

I guess I didn't think of therapy/counselling as I've had it before for mental health problems, which I now see as having little impact on my life.

What I'm really looking to do now is to make myself and my life the best that it can be. The place I want to get to is where I have better self esteem and feel able to deal with whatever life throws at me, to have an organised and productive life and good relationships with those around me.

I don't have the easiest relationship with my Dad either to be honest, but my family situation is not what people would class as normal (whatever normal is, but mine is pretty different to most).

Gwenx

gwen80

top_drawer wrote: »

I didn't try it. I was hoping to go for psychotherapy again but on 07/04 I fell and fractured both my wrists. I had to move back into my parents and am still there. Much of my problem was that I hated living where I was, with a nightmare landlady and despite putting lots of effort into looking for something else things just kept falling through/not working out.

Your list is very close to my own.

TD

Oh no, I'm sorry about your wrists. I hope you're healing well.

Some situations make things very difficult. I hope I've gotten better at recognising negative situations early and being more assertive, but there's always work to do. Having lived in a house that was in a complete state for far too long, I can sympathise. Your home should be your sanctuary.

I ordered two books and they arrived today - How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie and Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman. I really need to get on with reading them. I'm very good at ordering them, not so good at reading them.

Gwenx