Separated, how much should I provide?

duchy

I think for many people the time that a divorce takes is just the beginning and once the legalities are settled that is when the real healing starts and until everything is signed and sealed it is hard to think of looking forward but once it is everything changes.
Hang on in there Jack - You are nearly there.

JackRS

I spoke to my parents and they heard that he was taken in to have his appendix out.

duchy

I'm glad you found out and hope he's doing well now

olibrofiz

Virtual hugs from me too Jack. You come across as a really nice guy, yes, you do. This is just a blip in your life. I know the storm clouds have been hanging over you for too long but they do have a silver lining - trust me. Hard to do but look to the positives, there WILL be, and ARE, some. Hold on to those xx

kelpie35

JackRS wrote: »

I spoke to my parents and they heard that he was taken in to have his appendix out.

I am pleased that you have found out what happened with your son.

I hope he make a speedy recovery.

take care

LilElvis

JackRS wrote: »

I spoke to my parents and they heard that he was taken in to have his appendix out.

I'm glad that your son is OK, but appalled that your ex hasn't kept you informed. I would have expected that any mother (or grandparent) would inform a father of their child's illness as a priority, especially when it has required surgery. That she, and her parents, haven't breathed a word speaks volumes - the sort of callous behaviour you would expect from self-centred, Jeremy Kyle scum who think only of themselves, and certainly not what anyone would imagine seeing from someone who should be putting their child's best interests above their own, blinkered belief that their desire for vindication is paramount.

duchy

LilElvis wrote: »

I'm glad that your son is OK, but appalled that your ex hasn't kept you informed. I would have expected that any mother (or grandparent) would inform a father of their child's illness as a priority, especially when it has required surgery. That she, and her parents, haven't breathed a word speaks volumes - the sort of callous behaviour you would expect from self-centred, Jeremy Kyle scum who think only of themselves, and certainly not what anyone would imagine seeing from someone who should be putting their child's best interests above their own, blinkered belief that their desire for vindication is paramount.

Or alternatively Jack's son said he didn't want his Dad to know. He's of an age that patient confidentiality is his decision NOT his mother's.
I don't hold much truck for exMrsJ but we and Jack have no idea whose idea it was and we do know son isn't contacting him at present.

And I personally don't think any of Jack's family deserve to be called Jeremy Kyle scum !! This thread has managed to stay civilized throughout-I t would be a shame if that changed this close to the end of Jack's journey

ampersand

Hello Jack,
Just a quick Bonjour after yesterday.
I hope some element of 'A Quiet Mind and a Peaceful Heart' reached you somehow, if only through some responses to your post.

We care. We're not going anywhere. [I always note when Gigervamp has posted - blessings to you, too]

I hope today feels better.

JackRS

duchy wrote: »

Or alternatively Jack's son said he didn't want his Dad to know. He's of an age that patient confidentiality is his decision NOT his mother's.
I don't hold much truck for exMrsJ but we and Jack have no idea whose idea it was and we do know son isn't contacting him at present.

And I personally don't think any of Jack's family deserve to be called Jeremy Kyle scum !! This thread has managed to stay civilized throughout-I t would be a shame if that changed this close to the end of Jack's journey

Thanks LilElvis and Duchy for your views.

I suspect it was my sons request not to inform me and probably told my daughter not to mention it which put her in a difficult position, but like you say we don't know and as ever the post on here are only ever my side of the story. Yes I'm hurt not to be informed but under the circumstances I am not surprised. I maybe should be disappointed with my daughter as I asked her directly but then I feel that's not fair on her as I suspect she was under instruction from maybe her brother?

In terms of Jeremy Kyle reference, I believe LilElvis was saying that it's the type of behavior you might get from that type of person, I don't think he/she was saying my family members were actually like that. However I can see how it's possible for people to interpret the comments that way, but I don't believe that was the intention.

Thanks for your views and support everyone.

I hope today to receive the revised letter from my solicitor to send out.

justme111

Hi jack
You are human and therefore fallible ..
Just a question - how letting your daughter know to which extent it all affects you would actually be to your detriment re settlement? Guess that ex would not be amenable to your offer and try to get more is extremely far fetched , the court settlement may be to your benefit anyway and she is trying to get more no matter whether you spoke to daughter or not and in any case you can say no.
Re women - not sure whether it would make a difference in how you feel - I am quite a catch and I would been interested if we lived closer and I was not attached.:)