Separated, how much should I provide?

Ames

I'm not sure why I'm gobsmacked about her forgetting about the house sale, it's entirely consistent with my experience of solicitors! Hopefully this whole shambles will be over next week.

JackRS

ampersand wrote: »

'I apologise that I completely forgot you had sold the home.'

Good grief!... but are we surprised? Are you, Jack?

- and 'the house', not 'the home'...a long time since it was that for you.

You will create a real one in due course.
#
Is it definite still that Andrew Day cannot plead for you since date changed?
Hope Mr Thomas comes up to scratch.

Yes Andrew Day is on holiday, like someone else....

vroombroom

Good god Jack, your solicitor sounds as useful as a chocolate teapot. I would go it alone too - what's the point in having another useless person from that firm?

ampersand

Such a kind offer...
#2441 'However, I can ask my colleague xxxxxxxxxx to attend if you would like. Her hourly rate is £130 plus VAT. She would be able to bring all of your files to court should an issue arise. She will also make a detailed note of the hearing for your records.'

...which Jack politely declined
'I feel that there is little value someone else could add to proceedings as surely I have greater knowledge of my case, I’d assume the barrister would be provided with my file? Therefore I do not wish for one of your colleagues to attend.'

You have more knowledge of your case than either solicitor thus far and more a.t.d. The last thing you'd need is to be worrying about a.n.other's accuracy/interpretation apart from paying £130 p.h. for it.
#
Jack, could you make a 'naïve' call tmrw to chambers, just to ensure that brief has been received by Mr Thomas?

More importantly, in view of-
'This sets out your instructions to your barrister. I have carefully gone through your file to extract the key points as you have described them to xxxxx. Please do let me know if there are any further specific points or amendments that you would like to make'

-have you actually seen, amended, agreed this final version before tonight's DX?

JackRS

ampersand wrote: »

Such a kind offer...
#2441 'However, I can ask my colleague xxxxxxxxxx to attend if you would like. Her hourly rate is £130 plus VAT. She would be able to bring all of your files to court should an issue arise. She will also make a detailed note of the hearing for your records.'

...which Jack politely declined
'I feel that there is little value someone else could add to proceedings as surely I have greater knowledge of my case, I’d assume the barrister would be provided with my file? Therefore I do not wish for one of your colleagues to attend.'

You have more knowledge of your case than either solicitor thus far and more a.t.d. The last thing you'd need is to be worrying about a.n.other's accuracy/interpretation apart from paying £130 p.h. for it.
#
Jack, could you make a 'naïve' call tmrw to chambers, just to ensure that brief has been received by Mr Thomas?

More importantly, in view of-
'This sets out your instructions to your barrister. I have carefully gone through your file to extract the key points as you have described them to xxxxx. Please do let me know if there are any further specific points or amendments that you would like to make'

-have you actually seen, amended, agreed this final version before tonight's DX?

Yes I corrected it and sent it yesterday, it would have been something I could have created myself easily, I would have been better off doing it all myself and passing it on to the barrister, knowing what I know now etc etc...

ampersand

Yes indeed, so much 'etc.etc.' from this shower - as per mgdavid #2047[and other posts passim]

Please say you will check it is in Mr T's hands demain?

nicegirl

She 'completely forgot' the small point that you'd (just about) sold the house? :eek: I notice she didn't respond to your request not to be billed for this. Make sure you check your next bill carefully!

Maybe she and Andrew Day are going on holiday together.

micky2phones

JackRS wrote: »

Thanks for everyone’s support and help on this here’s where we are up to:

I proposed the following support for the transitional period before divorce and financial settlement is in place to encourage her to search for alternative income source:

1 Household Direct debits £457
2 Living allowance £543
3 lease car £161
4 children allowance £100
5 Driving lessons £200

There is no mortgage so just living costs and fuel for car to find. This is 40% of my take home and doesn’t leave me much as I have to pay rent, bills fuel and living costs for where I live plus £8K credit card debt to clear (0% to Feb13) so not sustainable and clearly not what I’d agree to in a final settlement. I gave her 2 weeks to consider and has come back as follows:

Proposed to put house on the market, which I agree. She wants to leave joint account as it is to cover direct debits for bills etc for this period while selling. She suggests I change joint account to one name as all direct debits set up so I was thinking OK put it in her name only but I think she was thinking of putting it in mine? Her point is why change everything if we’re selling and she’s moving out but things can drag on? My pay goes into my personnel account and I transfer to cover each bill etc so joint is always on zero or in allowable overdraft.

She has requested child tax credit pack but can take 2 weeks? She has also inquired about child benefit for youngest (17)?

She also says to keep driving lesson as they are which is actually £63 a week which is £250 not the £200 I suggested but obviously the kids hate me already so I guess I have to let that go.

She doesn’t want to speak to me so only will communicate through email. I suspect she’s been advised to sit tight for now and telling the kids that I’m cutting the money off etc so they hate me even more. I tried sending them text but no replies so I have to accept that whatever I do, how ever reasonable I’m being it won’t be seen that way, that’s down to my choices I see that.

Hello, not the same as the trouble you are having, a friend of mine paid his ex for his son and her daughter from someone else.

She moaned that it was not enough went on about CSA, so he stopped paying and told her to contact CSA.

She did and ended up with a lot less and none for the daughter as she wasnt his.

It does show that when anyone who been offered more than should have should be happy

JackRS

micky2phones wrote: »

Hello, not the same as the trouble you are having, a friend of mine paid his ex for his son and her daughter from someone else.

She moaned that it was not enough went on about CSA, so he stopped paying and told her to contact CSA.

She did and ended up with a lot less and none for the daughter as she wasnt his.

It does show that when anyone who been offered more than should have should be happy

Thanks there are some examples I know of like your friends, it shows that that every situation is different. Reading back one of my earlier posts from nearly 2 years back is scary and reminds me that I was trying to be reasonable and fair to give my ex time to adjust. So strictly speaking I could have paid nothing and wait for CSA to come for me but I didn't consider that reasonable. I wanted to pay the CSA amount of £650pcm until he finishes his course this June. Additionally I paid maintenance of £500pcm up to September 2014 and provided a car, just fuel to pay for until May this year. This may be more than some would do but this is what I believed to be reasonable. The FDR next week I hope will conclude what is expected going forward, but CSA will not be part of it.

enthusiasticsaver

I hope all goes well next week at your court hearing Jack and hope the Judge agrees to a fair settlement. I find your solicitor's incompetence and inattention to detail incredible and think you definitely have grounds for complaint and hopefully some sort of recompense on the incredibly high legal fees you have incurred during this whole sorry mess.






Incidentally have your son and daughter actually passed their driving tests yet?