Separated, how much should I provide?

justme111

JackRS wrote: »

Thanks yes I know, I did say to my solicitor that she could have spent a whole year on a college course for something finishing now and even a 2 year one giving her something to progress with from the end of next year. I originally said I’d be prepared to pay another 3 month SM but my solicitor thought it was unlikely to be agreed.

Then your next line of defense would be demonstrating you can not satisfy her needs unless forgoing your own and it would not be acceptable as in that csee she would be in a better position than you .

Thumper7

Hi Jack


Are you happy with your solicitor's advice and do you think is fair.


Even if you don't is it something that you can live with, even for another year?


That's all that matters. If she doesn't agree, then tough, play hard ball all the way to court. she had her chance.


D

justme111

Thumper7 wrote: »

Hi Jack


Are you happy with your solicitor's advice and do you think is fair.


Even if you don't is it something that you can live with, even for another year?


That's all that matters. If she doesn't agree, then tough, play hard ball all the way to court. she had her chance.



I don't think it is responsible of you to give so drastic advice . Court is a delay again which compromises quality of life and expense. You can not possibly draw the.line where you.would go to court , advising like that to someone
who is unsure and in emotional state may be contraproducent.

Thumper7

justme111 wrote: »

Thumper7 wrote: »

Hi Jack


Are you happy with your solicitor's advice and do you think is fair.


Even if you don't is it something that you can live with, even for another year?


That's all that matters. If she doesn't agree, then tough, play hard ball all the way to court. she had her chance.



I don't think it is responsible of you to give so drastic advice . Court is a delay again which compromises quality of life and expense. You can not possibly draw the.line where you.would go to court , advising like that to someone
who is unsure and in emotional state may be contraproducent.

I have given Jack no advice. If mediation doesn't work, he has no option but to revert to court, what do you want him to do, roll over and give in to her demands.


I think you should go back and read what I have actually posted, and not comment on what you think I have posted.


And just for your information, I am exactly where Jack is at this time, even though our roles are reversed.

justme111

Thumper7 wrote: »

justme111 wrote: »

And just for your information, I am exactly where Jack is at this time, even though our roles are reversed.

Then you have a great example of how to sound polite respectful and not drunk in our op

Thumper7

justme111 wrote: »

Thumper7 wrote: »

Then you have a great example of how to sound polite respectful and not drunk in our op

How dare you, you mention respect and you post that. Now this is Jacks thread and I would "respectfully" ask that you desist trying to de-rail his thread with insults.


If mediation doesn't work what do YOU suggest he does next, if not go to court?

JackRS

Please team please don't argue, this an open forum for opinion it's up to all of us how we use it. I really appreciate everyone’s support but just as valuable are different views and opinion as this all helps me prepare for things. Need my team to have healthy debates but not to make things personal, we all have enough personal joy to deal with in the real world.

Play nicely x

justme111

Ok
Thumper , piece ?:)
(Go easy on wine though !:D). Jack may envy you , I doubt he is drinking - likely has no money left x

RAS

JackRS

One point if madam insists that she needs more money to provide for the "children".

1. You will support DS for one more year - it will I think be August 31 that is the cut off date.

2. You will not be giving her money to support DD; your reasonable expenses will include a sum to support DD if she requires it whilst at university and going forward you expect to support your son directly not through his mother.

That way she does not get money for the "children" now which she then continues to try and claim once they are at university etc.

In fact if she mentions children, respond that actually they are adults; albeit that they are still in education.

JackRS

RAS wrote: »

JackRS

One point if madam insists that she needs more money to provide for the "children".

1. You will support DS for one more year - it will I think be August 31 that is the cut off date.

2. You will not be giving her money to support DD; your reasonable expenses will include a sum to support DD if she requires it whilst at university and going forward you expect to support your son directly not through his mother.

That way she does not get money for the "children" now which she then continues to try and claim once they are at university etc.

In fact if she mentions children, respond that actually they are adults; albeit that they are still in education.

OK but I believe I will pay CM for DS at £650/m until course ends June 2015. So when we do needs and income calc that amount is included in her income