Separated, how much should I provide?

Reams

To add, I think that this forum and some others are fantastic for emotional support.
Please though ignore any legal advice. well meant, though it is.

kelpie35

Hope things are ok with you Jack

Take care and enjoy the rest of the weekend.

JackRS

Sorry for not posting earlier not a massive amount to report from the first Mediation.

Most of the time the Mediator explained the process and the options. She spoke to us individually about our situations and issues. She went through the requirements in terms of financial documents required, she just needs all the usual thing last 3 pay slips, P60, Last 3 months bank statements, all credit card latest statements etc.

Interestingly when she was asking the ex about her income you could tell it wasn’t making sense to her when she said that she didn’t have a job at the moment when talking about no potential to get a mortgage. The Mediator asked her what sort job she wanted to do but hadn’t been successful due to no recent experience. I kept calm and didn’t comment. I know that for the type of admin work she needs to be registered with the various agencies that companies (including mine) go to when wanting temporary or permanent admin staff, we don’t advertise. She needs to be registered on various agencies to get the chance of initially a temp job to get her some recent experience. This will help to improve her CV with recent experience when applying getting a permanent job. However any advice like that is not well received as she thinks I’m just trying to find a way to get out of paying her, I’m such a mean and tight man apparently.

We’ve set the next mediation appointment for 2 weeks and agreed to submit all the required document electronically during this week. The sessions are between1 and 2 hours, I stressed that we’d try and have some structure and discipline to minimize the time as at £200/hour we need to ensure the best value. With every 3 minutes being £10, we need to maximise the value, so I’ll ensure we keep focused on the points to be agreed.

Emoov will come mid week to photograph and to create floor plan. So I did think about going over to the house to jet wash the patio, oil the decking and creosote the railway sleepers so it’s nice for the photo’s but then I thought, I get 2 days off a week and she gets 7, so why can’t she do it after all she’ll benefit the most from the sale.

My current rental situation not clear as the agent called Friday and left a message something about sorting out the situation so not sure if that means I’ve got to move out soon or what.

On the social scene I went to an open air concert with some friends, got wet in the first 10 minutes but then it was warm and dry, some of you more mature readers may recognise some of the acts that were on…

T'pau
Paul Young
The Real Thing
Boney M
Rick Astley
Bananarama

This week I need to create e-documents of all payslip, bank and credit card statements. list my lving costs again using the new list to be provided by the Mediator. Oh the joy of having to go through financial disclosure again, as the previous form-e’s were submitted a year ago.

kelpie35

So pleased you were able to enjoy the concert, I do recall all these acts lol.

I did not realise it costs so much for mediation, hope the bill is being halved.

I hope you can get your living arrangements sorted ASAP. I also am impressed with the decision you made about sorting garden etc out for sale. You work so hard and are under so much pressure you deserve to have time to yourself.

Take care.

RAS

JackRS wrote: »

My current rental situation not clear as the agent called Friday and left a message something about sorting out the situation so not sure if that means I’ve got to move out soon or what.

JackRS

Has madam indicated when she intends to move down south?

With respect to the rental I suggest that you tell them you need to go periodic.

This happens automatically if you fail to move out at the end of the fixed term but it commits you to paying rent until day before the September rent date.

They can then issue a section 21 notice which gives you two months to move out or suck it and see.

Do check whether they gave you an S21 at the beginning of the tenancy and take advice on the renting and housing forum here as often these are issued incorrectly.

Once periodic, you have to give one month's notice to leave tied in with a rent date, which is why it is hard do this for August. There is some discussion on the renting forum about the legals but it is not clear.

**Patty**

JackRS wrote: »

On the social scene I went to an open air concert with some friends, got wet in the first 10 minutes but then it was warm and dry, some of you more mature readers may recognise some of the acts that were on…


T'pau
Paul Young
The Real Thing
Boney M
Rick Astley
Bananarama



This week I need to create e-documents of all payslip, bank and credit card statements. list my lving costs again using the new list to be provided by the Mediator. Oh the joy of having to go through financial disclosure again, as the previous form-e’s were submitted a year ago

More mature? *raises eyebrows*
Yes i know all of them.

Minor point (to make the most of the mediator) :

Will doing disclosure again show that your CC bills have risen?
Would now be a good time to point out that hers *should* have surely decreased after a year ?

After all......spending on CC debt whilst not working would be financially irresponsible........and with the amount of maintanance she has been receiving i would be asking questions if it has risen.

summerof0763

well done on going to open air festival jack I remember all them, I was also at one its called rewind is acts from 80's jimmy sommerville, boomtown rals, billy ocean you get the gist got drenched both days but fantastic weekend, xx

JackRS

**Patty** wrote: »

More mature? *raises eyebrows*
Yes i know all of them.

Minor point (to make the most of the mediator) :

Will doing disclosure again show that your CC bills have risen?
Would now be a good time to point out that hers *should* have surely decreased after a year ?

After all......spending on CC debt whilst not working would be financially irresponsible........and with the amount of maintanance she has been receiving i would be asking questions if it has risen.

Hi and thanks, her debt as I understand has mainly been from her solicitors charges.

JackRS

summerof0763 wrote: »

well done on going to open air festival jack I remember all them, I was also at one its called rewind is acts from 80's jimmy sommerville, boomtown rals, billy ocean you get the gist got drenched both days but fantastic weekend, xx

Ah so when your tag line says you've nothing that's not true is it, you've got a wealth of wet happy memories, priceless...

RAS

JackRS wrote: »

Interestingly when she was asking the ex about her income you could tell it wasn’t making sense to her when she said that she didn’t have a job at the moment when talking about no potential to get a mortgage. The Mediator asked her what sort job she wanted to do but hadn’t been successful due to no recent experience. I kept calm and didn’t comment. I know that for the type of admin work she needs to be registered with the various agencies that companies (including mine) go to when wanting temporary or permanent admin staff, we don’t advertise. She needs to be registered on various agencies to get the chance of initially a temp job to get her some recent experience. This will help to improve her CV with recent experience when applying getting a permanent job.

One area where there are often short-term contracts here that do get advertised is http://www.jobs.ac.uk/

She would be looking at bottom end admin say £15-18K but the scope to move up is often good.