Here we go again......

Errata

I gotta just leave them get on with it.

I think you're right. Just because she'll be discharged from hospital doesn't mean she's in tip top condition and if your dad continues to supply her with alcohol, and it looks like he probably will, another crisis won't be far off as she won't be fully recovered from her recent one.

timeou

Thanks folks - just thought I'd update you all with the recent developments as you'd all been so kind to take time to respond before. x

happyhaddock_2

Hi timeou, please accept my sympathy and understanding of your awful situation.

I could of written most of it myself, just swap 'dad' for 'sister', who unfortunately has been run ragged by our mum and ended up having a severe mental breakdown

I can totally relate to everything you say, our mum has also recently been released from hospital, just to carry on drinking. She has end stage liver diseas (cirrhosis), gallstones, bruising, jaundice and is very thin. However she now says she's feeling so much better she no longer needs to see her consultant!

Its very hard, I have minimal contact with her, it was none until this latest hospital admittance. You have to just think of yourself I'm afraid, otherwise they'll drag you down with them.

Ours is just a waiting game now, no one can do anything and she doesn't want to . I hope you're able to cope with your situation and try not to feel guilty, its not your fault x

timeou

Thank you, hugs to you too, it's a horrible situation. Yes, I've decided on no contact with her at all. Dad knows he can come to me if needs be but he also knows he's the one in control of the situation. I can't insist she doesn't come home nor can I be the one to deal with her of she comes home. He's an adult too and can choose not to put up with it all. I hope he also breaks free so he can live out the rest of his life in peace. Either that or she hurries up and finishes what she's so determined to do...

happyhaddock_2

Oh timeou I can empathise so much with what you say. Its awful wanting things to 'hurry up' but we're just so drained with it all we can't cope with it any more.

Like you say if they refuse treatment there's nothing anyone can do. We refused to collect her from hospital (awful I know) just so that the authorities would have to get involved but she has just cancelled all the help

Have you heard of narcissism? We both firmly believe our mum is a narcissist and has been all our lives. It makes so much sense when you read about it x

timeou

I said in the hospital yesterday that we didn't want her home and we wanted her put in some kind of residential care. The ward sister didnt think that was an option and that my father should make her homeless. That's not going to happen! Like you I'm drained with it all too. I just want it to be over. X

happyhaddock_2

If she's anything like our mum she's too 'well' to go in a home The only thing in our favour was, as dad has passed away, she would be going back to an empty house. So the authorities had to do something.