Frugal Frump to Fab-u-lous Spring Equinox to Summer Solstice

fedupandskint

Lots of fab comments today about my new haitcut looking nice - from MEN!!! Amazing, they never usually notice a thing! I certainly feel better with it shorter rather than it hanging heavily like it has done for quite a while and currently hiding those greys better than before as I was going to colour again but now can leave it a little longer - result!

As I still feel quite coldy, sore throat and chesty I'm having a few days off exercise to get over it and hoping normal sevice is resumed by the weekend

evilsquid1603

ive just stumbled across this blog:http://everyonegetsdivorced.com (even i'm not sure how i got to it, last thing i remember before it was that i was on the Allure magazine website :rotfl: ) and i haven't stopped laughing!

I found some divorce Haikus that made me laugh:

We had our good days
For example, this one time…
On second thought, no

You are so lucky
I was ever seen with you
Ludicrous haircut

fedupandskint

More fab comments today about how well I look - nice one!

Feel better today so hopefully on the mend and back to some gentle exercise at the weekend

WelshWoofer

EvilSquid - Things I wish I'd known before I got married.....

1. That relationships don't get better just because you're married
2. A wedding day is a complete faff and hard work
3. You become a mother substitute, chief cleaner, washer, shopper, tidier upper....for no thanks
4. The novelty wears off very quickly

AND THE BIG ONE....
5. That your husband is gay (really!) and everyone else had their suspicions and nobody told you! How did I not know? A true fact! I'm over it now though and actually think its quite funny looking back. Strange how time changes your perspective.:)


Anyway, onwards and upwards after years in the wilderness, the fling is as fab as ever - saw him this evening and will see him tomorrow too. All still very passionate

Ladies, there is life after divorce!:rotfl:

evilsquid1603

WelshWoofer wrote: »

EvilSquid - Things I wish I'd known before I got married.....

1. That relationships don't get better just because you're married
2. A wedding day is a complete faff and hard work
3. You become a mother substitute, chief cleaner, washer, shopper, tidier upper....for no thanks
4. The novelty wears off very quickly

AND THE BIG ONE....
5. That your husband is gay (really!) and everyone else had their suspicions and nobody told you! How did I not know? A true fact! I'm over it now though and actually think its quite funny looking back. Strange how time changes your perspective.:)


Anyway, onwards and upwards after years in the wilderness, the fling is as fab as ever - saw him this evening and will see him tomorrow too. All still very passionate

Ladies, there is life after divorce!:rotfl:

it wouldnt surprise me if mine was too, the bromance with our housemate appears to be going from strength to strength!

he text me at 4.30 saying he's just been fired. ive not replied. this evening the housemate posted a video on Facebook of the cat messing around and could hear him laughing the background. saw that theres also pictures of him on sunday after telling me his life was over and he wants me back etc etc that he was larking around in the park and check ins at the local pubs. somehow doesn't seem to me to be the actions of a man who's claiming to be really devastated he's just lost his wife and supposedly his job in under a month. some of the attention seeking stunts he pulls you couldn't even make up!

lessonlearned

Good evening ladies

Indeed there is life after divorce........And often a much better life too.

Agree WW - hindsight is a wonderful thing.

My ex was not gay - he was, however, a monumental crashing bore, a complete stuffed shirt whose idea of fun was watching westerns and whose reading was restricted to books about trains:rotfl::rotfl:, who wouldn't have been seen dead in an art gallery and who thought the theatre was for "toffs", who thought a wife's sole purpose on this earth was to pander to his every whim.

Oh and just for good measure - he was a miser. :eek:

What a gullible little fool I was. He almost sucked my life's blood from me until I finally woke up. One day the worm just simply turned.;)

One morning the scales fell from my eyes, I looked at him and thought "What am I doing throwing my life away on this charmless oaf". It was on New Year's Day and I just said to myself "Enough".

My first act of celebration was a damn good foreign holiday. I splashed the cash on a cruise round the Med. He was horrified

Evilsquid - it's all still a bit raw for you - it will get easier I promise. There is a better life for you and there will be good times ahead.

lessonlearned

Time for a rant!!!

I arrived home just as the phone rang, Adult Social Services to say that they had been to see my mum and she wants to stay in her current nursing home after all and my dad is also in agreement.

This is the woman who has been in tears, begging to come home, complaining about everything under the sun, who said she couldn't bear sharing a room etc etc

I have spent the last fortnight running around, visiting homes, badgering Social Services and haggling to get them a good package. :mad::mad::mad:

I've hardly slept and my stomach is now almost at the full ulcer flare up stage......

I absolutely give up. :rotfl:

On a more positive note I went to physio and feel quite human again.

Going to have a restful evening.

Tomorrow we are meeting with the Vendor who is going to talk us through the restoration work they have done.......

I'm really looking forward to this house move.

lessonlearned

OK this is it. Time to fight back. My stomach ulcer is now back, along with chest pains, IBS, joint pain, headaches.

This is all down to s t r e s s.

Guess what - I've had enough. The worm is turning.

Last night my Dad was on the phone whinging, complaining, playing the "helpless" card again. I did what I should have done a long time ago.....

I told him that from now on he has to deal with transferring mum to another nursing home, to make his own decisions, and to deal with Social Services. He is perfectly capable or at least that's what he tells everyone. Every time I set something up he either does something completely contrary or he moans to anyone who will listen that I am "taking over", "not consulting him" or "treating him like a child"........

Actually it is not as bad as it sounds. I haven't abandoned him or mum.;) I have actually set everything up so all he has to do is phone SS with his decision as to which home. Everything will then slot into place from there. I will of course still do the financial side of things - although that is going to be easier said than done. However, that will be the final piece of the jigsaw.

From now on I will be a "helicopter daughter". I will just hover and monitor. If he wants to run the show, then so be it.

It is now time to concentrate on getting better, before I end up a nursing home myself. It's time I was a little bit selfish......

Anyway it looks like the sun is trying to come out - let's hope we have a better day today. Yesterday I got drenched several times.

This evening the boys and I are meeting with the Vendors at "our" new property - keeping those fingers crossed - to go over the restoration work they have done to the house and learn a bit about it's history......

I know it won't be "my" house, it will belong to DS1, but I'm really looking forward to moving in and living there for a while.

This house is one we have bought with our hearts. It takes the place of our family home and we will hang on to it for a long time. It is one to love and cherish. Renting is ok, but it is costing a lot of money and we all want to put down roots. DS1 has been renting for 10 years bless him. We will then buy a second house which will be a development project to make some money.

I've done all I can to help my parents - it's time to get cracking on my own projects now. I need to make some money and secure my financial future.

Anyway today is Fab Friday and yes the sun is now shining.

Time to fab up and start the day. Face mask, eyebrow tidy and some defuzzing today.......

Have a great day and forgive my little rants and whinging. It's been a hard week and there are times when you just have to let off a little steam;)

Normal service will now be resumed.

podperson

Morning all,

Sorry have MIA for a few days, manic here (for a change!)

evilsquid - sounds like you are very well rid there! Glad you're seeing right through his manipulative actions.

LL - wow, I just don't know what to say about your parents! I think you are absolutely doing the right thing with taking a step back. I do wonder if possibly your mum was being 'nudged' a bit into certain answers by SS - we saw that a lot with my grandma and tbh I found it infuriating. We would usually always make sure we had someone there as well if she was getting assessed so that when she did the inevitable 'oh, I'm fine' speech then they could pipe up and say, 'actually, no you're not, remember this, this and this?'. I don't know how people on their own must manage though. :mad: Anyway, you have done all you can, you have given them the information, pointed them in the right direction so hopefully they will be able to make a decision and move things on.
As you say if things go like this you will just end up making yourself ill and then be no good to anyone. It's not selfish to realise your limits and that you can only do so much for people before they need to take a bit of responsibility themselves. Exciting news on the house though! Think it will be great to have a project to get stuck into

Anyway, as mentioned bit of a hectic week. Finally managed to get up to date with all the photo work. Have been constantly job hunting but not found anything else yet, hoping the Chinese woman is still ok with me going in next week, think may drop her a wee email today. Work haven't mentioned to me about doing hours after I leave - I get the feeling they're slightly assuming I'll do some but they haven't asked me so have no idea what's going on there. Would quite like to know one way or the other really! New girl is still pretty useless and tbh is really annoying me as she keeps saying to me 'oh, I think you should definately stay,' - erm, it's not like I particularly asked to go, it's not up to me and you've now taken my job. Anyone else think it's a little insensitive? :mad: I think she's just realised that's she's seriously going to struggle when I do leave.

My mum's also informed me that they want to come up 'before July' which I'm guessing means either next weekend or the one after. Would like to see them but July would be much more convenient, but she definately doesn't want to come then as it will be 'too busy' - *sighs* I don't see that a week or two will make any difference to that but once she gets an idea in her head. Still haven't even told her about the work situation, think I really need to do this weekend. I just know she's going to be really negative about it and tbh I don't really need that when I'm worrying a bit myself

Ah well, it's Friday today so almost weekend. Hope everyone is having a good day x

evilsquid1603

LL - you are doing the right thing, you need to look after yourself too.

Pod - if the new girl is saying that t sounds like work really will get a shock when you go!

im off away for the weekend, tagging along with my parents holiday to Center Parcs. looking forward to doing absolutely zilch for a whole weekend!