Nice people thread part 8 - worth the wait

lemonjelly

Saw this & thought of Gen/NDG (in the nicest possible way of course).
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-22403731

Itismehonest

I always struggle with the correct use of I or me.
'My husband, my friend & I' or 'me, my husband & a friend'?
I tend to use the first &, consequently, sound like a Lillibet impressionist but I have never really worked it out.
My other blind spot is when writing affect & effect. I always have to stop & think on that one & quite often will end up using a completely different sentence to get round it :rotfl:

LydiaJ

silvercar wrote: »

I'm afraid you will all turn out to be totally different to how I imagine you to be and that you will decide I am odd/ boring/ not the person you thought you knew.

and I don't like curry.

BTW to everyone that has ever sent me their name through PM, the otherside or dropped hints, I have never heard of any of you. Felt awkward that the giving of a name should have a similar response by me, as you would in RL. But then the identification was by a choice I didn't want to make.

There's absolutely no need to feel awkward about it. I put my name when I PM'd you, but my name is not uncommon, and I'm not handing out my surname to many people. I don't need to know your name if you'd rather not give it. I can know you as silvercar and that's OK by me.

In other circumstances I've been one of the few not letting on what their real name is. I felt awkward about, as you describe, but I wanted to protect my anonymity, so I continued with my pseudonym, and nobody seemed to mind.

I don't like most curries, but have learnt to eat korma happily, which means I can join in when people are going out for a curry.

Itismehonest wrote: »

I always struggle with the correct use of I or me.
'My husband, my friend & I' or 'me, my husband & a friend'?
I tend to use the first &, consequently, sound like a Lillibet impressionist but I have never really worked it out.
My other blind spot is when writing affect & effect. I always have to stop & think on that one & quite often will end up using a completely different sentence to get round it :rotfl:

The I and me one is easy once you know the rules.
1) To work out whether it's I or me, just eliminate the husband and friend, choose I or me, and put the husband and friend back in. So...
I went to the pub. The landlord sold me a drink.
My husband, my friend and I went to the pub. The landlord sold my husband, my friend and me drinks.
2) Always put yourself last if you're saying I. Usually put yourself last if you're saying me, unless it sounds better the other way.

Affect is almost always a verb, and effect is almost always a noun. They can each be the other thing, but so rarely that it's not worth bothering about unless you're interested in that sort of thing. So if you affect something, you have an effect on it. Comes up in science experiments all the time, so I have to teach that one in school.

LydiaJ

lostinrates wrote: »

The thing about these meet ups is that there is always te risk of an oddball. Most of the np I'd adore to spend a meal chatting with, meeting in person, but the oddball being there or having my email address is not comforting. Therefore I am hesitating to join any email group about this.

Of course, i could leave foundinrates at home

Agreed. I'm considering creating a disposable email address for the purpose. Then if things get scary, I can discontinue it.

GDB2222 wrote: »

I'm happy to meet up, especially in London. We can preserve some anonymity by just using our screen names here, I suppose.

But the big question is whether we will be bringing WAGs or HABs for them to be looked over? Mrs B is a big improvement on me, or at least I think so.

Also, name-tags: can we have name-tags for the Aspies, please?

I haven't got a HAB to bring. Last time we met up it was daytime, at a venue where there was lots to do, and I brought my kids, as did another NP. I wouldn't bring them to a meal in a pub in the evening, though. Some people brought their WAG/HABs, and others didn't, according to whether the WAG/HABs wanted to come.

If anybody wants to give me a name tag saying Lydia, I'll happily wear it.

Itismehonest

LydiaJ wrote: »

The I and me one is easy once you know the rules.
1) To work out whether it's I or me, just eliminate the husband and friend, choose I or me, and put the husband and friend back in. So...
I went to the pub. The landlord sold me a drink.
My husband, my friend and I went to the pub. The landlord sold my husband, my friend and me drinks.
2) Always put yourself last if you're saying I. Usually put yourself last if you're saying me, unless it sounds better the other way.

Affect is almost always a verb, and effect is almost always a noun. They can each be the other thing, but so rarely that it's not worth bothering about unless you're interested in that sort of thing. So if you affect something, you have an effect on it. Comes up in science experiments all the time, so I have to teach that one in school.

Thanks. So..... The landlord sold my husband, my friend & I drinks.... is wrong?

Nikkster

LydiaJ wrote: »

Interesting. Thanks zag.

Even if it were possible, there's no evolutionary pressure for us to evolve to be more intelligent. All over the world, number of offspring per woman are lower amongst the more intelligent and/or more educated, and the generations are further apart too. So we not selecting for intelligence at all.



Nikkster, I remember when I was house hunting despairing of ever finding anything I liked that I could afford. But eventually I did. And so will you. I certainly feel a lot more confident about you finding the right house than about me finding the right bloke!

Evolution - perhaps there is a better chance of survival now if generations are spaced out thus making better use of resources (esp as medicine can improve fertility) - of course, this doesn't take into account state intervention. Not sure whether I believe that, but its an alternative argument.

I remember your house hunting I'm definitely going to be patient, however much I would really like not to be. I've been saving for, er, 15 years - another few months won't hurt too much

And thanks for your kind words too Hamish (there is something I never thought I would type!). I have infinitely more confidence in finding a suitable house than a suitable man. That's for sure!

HAMISH_MCTAVISH wrote: »

Well, I've racked my brain to come with some funny little 'mewbie-esque' comparison (this board is most definitely poorer for his absence) about houses being like blokes.... and failed miserably!

Obviously too early in the morning for it....

But I do hope you both find what you're looking for, and as an eternal optimist, I do sort of think that good things eventually find good people so hopefully the right house/bloke/whatever will be just around the corner for anyone.

Nikkster

LydiaJ wrote: »

Agreed. I'm considering creating a disposable email address for the purpose. Then if things get scary, I can discontinue it.



I haven't got a HAB to bring. Last time we met up it was daytime, at a venue where there was lots to do, and I brought my kids, as did another NP. I wouldn't bring them to a meal in a pub in the evening, though. Some people brought their WAG/HABs, and others didn't, according to whether the WAG/HABs wanted to come.

If anybody wants to give me a name tag saying Lydia, I'll happily wear it.

That's a great idea lydia.

I don't have anyone to bring... at all! I'll happily wear a name tag saying Nikkster Though many of you shorten that anyway... (where is the waggy finger?)

lostinrates

Look you mopey but otherwise beautiful women. You go house hunting, you set a list of must haves, some nice to haves and then find you make some compromises. It's the same with men. (Or women if this is directed at nice single men). They are there, I know I keep saying it but its because its true. You have to make some compromises and they don't knock on your door.

Oh, and there is no mr right. There is mr pretty damn worth making it worth with. After all, we ourselves are not faultless either!

Nikkster

Just thinking about it - the first (hastily cancelled) meet-up... I was going to come along. I think it was before I had de-lurked. I very much doubt I would have introduced myself (esp seeing as I probably hadn't done so online either!), but I was really curious about what everyone looked like.

Promise the only reason I'd have brought along an umbrella would have been if it had been forecast to rain!

lostinrates

Nikkster wrote: »

That's a great idea lydia.

I don't have anyone to bring... at all! I'll happily wear a name tag saying Nikkster Though many of you shorten that anyway... (where is the waggy finger?)

I don't think I'm going to make the next meet up tbh. (Which is making me really sad, I just adore gen , but if I did I would use the name I use in PMs. You could call me that or lit or lostinrates (which macputer changed to lost ingrates) or mouthy, or fatty, or curly locks or whatever.