Very Broody......

sassyblue

Bride2be24 wrote: »

who said anything about expecting it free on nhs??? bit harsh to say when you dont know me!!!! i wouldnt even think about getting free so please keep opinions like this to yourself

That was truthful advice so why be OTT with your response?

I had one free IVF and l was bloody grateful, me and DH paid enough in taxes over the years.

marisco_2

My ex and I eventually approached a clinic in London that we had been recommended to. They did blood tests and a very thorough scan and we discovered what was causing our problem in trying to concieve. It took a further six months after recieving some treatment and following their advice for me to fall pregnant naturally. It may have happened anyway, something we will never know of course.

However you decide to proceed from here OP is entirely your decision. You know yourselves and your cirumstances and are best placed to know what will work for you and your husband.

FatVonD

I'm not overly superstitious so believe it to be entirely coincidental but I did miscarry my son's twin (non identical) the day I went pram shopping for a double pram :eek:

LEJC

I actually think its quite a natural thing to be broody and probably linger a little longer over baby things in the shops than you should...but whats the harm in that...I still go squishy at babies and baby things and whilst i dont consider myself old...reality is im probably closer to becomming a grandmother than i am to being a mum again!

Although having been through having a child and watching him grow up I wouldnt necessarily say that you should be buying "bits and pieces" on the hope that you will have a baby..

lots of people conceive quickly,some take a long time and for a few it doesnt happen...and whilst I dont think you should try and pidgeon hole yourself into one of those catagories,I dont think you should assume that even by going down the route of IVF or even adoption that you will eventually have a baby....and realistically you also still have a few years to still try to conceive naturally.

I knew a good year before I mentioned anything about havng children to my husband that i wanted a baby,and what i did was set up an account where i paid in spare money and a regular small standing order so that at the end of the year quite a fund had accumulated...when I eventually owned up to my desire,thankfully OH was in agreement we decided to continue the savings so that when I eventually got pregnant there was a good accumulation of money to help with expenses or even to allow me to take some additional time off work to spend time with baby...we also decided that if I didnt get pregnant then the money would allow us "treats" and extras....once you put any spare money into "baby goods" however well intentioned then if you end up not making use of them they become someone elses bargain on ebay...

I have a friend who has wanted a child for many years and initally wanted to adopt a baby,but they are so few and far between she decided 2 years ago to opt for a slightly older child and a few months ago she and her husband were pleased to welcome a little boy who was 3 years old...she loves him to bits and he really has completed their family...but again if she had filled even a drawer full of "baby bits" they sadly would have been no use to her.

keep all your options open at the moment,whether you conceive naturally or need a little intervention by either IVF or even eventual adoption I hope it all works out for you both.

hawk30

There is absolutely no guarantee of you getting a baby, either through ivf (or other medical procedures) or through adoption (there are massive hoops to jump through and if you don't, you can't adopt!). So do prepare yourself for the fact it might never happen.

I would echo the advice to approach your doctor to start the tests.

onlyroz

emsywoo123 wrote: »

It's supposed to jinx it. Like the whole "telling people before 12 weeks" thing. Old wives tale

That's got nothing to do with jinxing the pregnancy - it's just common sense not to go blurting the news around everywhere while there's still a high chance of miscarriage.

Spendless

Bride2be24 wrote: »

but surely for anyone who is trying to conceive for a 2nd,3rd or even 4th time they will more than likely keep quite abit of baby things in the house for their other babies, so whats so different if you buy the odd item here and there and keeping it in the house than having it in the house from previous babies whilst trying to conceive another time???

Because you are keeping it having been used you've just not got rid of it (yet) rather than buying it for the first time and also those people have already 'proved' that they are able to conceive, though secondary infertility can certainly happen, but in the event that the 2nd, 3rd, 4th baby doesn't happen and the baby item(s) eventually are got rid of, it's still been used.

I live next door to someone who has always wanted a second child and not only has she saved loads of things from her first baby (who is now in his 20s) she has also bought loads of things for this 2nd baby she has never had. She had so much stuff that I borrowed items from her when I had my youngest. As an outsider looking in on this, I can just see that it made her become more obsessed with conceiving (several rounds of egg donation IVF-none of which led to pregnancy) and 'hi-lighted' her upset over it. I really believe she would have been better off putting her money and time into something she actually had rather than concentrating on something she didn't have.

In your case I'd just set the money aside in a bank account. If you have a baby then the cash is there and no I don't think everything becomes more expensive. My eldest is 13 and I see some items cheaper now than they were then. Good luck on trying.:)

SUESMITH_2

personally i wouldn't buy things. my sister had a friend who did what you are thinking about doing, and even decorated the room. unfortunately for them it just never happened and then they had to get rid of everything and redo the room - plus every month when it didn't happen she had to look at all this stuff!

snozberry

I wouldn't recommend buying anything either. Just imagine how you would feel if you had baby things in your house and it never happened. I know that I would find it deeply upsetting.

make_me_wise

My husband and I were trying for a baby for just over two years. I finally fell pregnant naturally.

What worked for us was deciding to give up. We thought it would never happen, though having had tests there was no real reason as to why this was. So we forgot about it, moved house, bought 2 new cars and booked an amazing holiday.

2 months later I fell pregnant. I honestly put it down to all the emotional pressure being lifted and not thinking about it any more. Got the mother of all shocks at our first scan when we discovered I was carrying twins. Best of luck OP I hope it happens for you really soon.