MSE Newborn to 1 year (& beyond!) baby club 2

Bamama

I just think !!!! it. Me and my little man are happy and I'll just go with flow as much as possible.

Mrshaworth2b

It's def hard on a relationship when you have a baby, I think we all know that now!! I think sometimes maybe I have too many expectations of how this was going to be.... Then I realise that no I don't! I just didn't expect selfishness to carry on!!

Bamama

We were still in hospital when OH asked if he could go to a gig in Feb. I was thinking... we don't even know if we'll be home!

martafdz

Bamama, I don't really know what to say, I agree with what has been said, a baby puts a lot of strain on a relationship and there's a lot of expectations on us to juggle baby caring and nursing with household and our relationship. We are also still hormonal, which doesn't help. I remember a few weeks when I felt angry at many of the things DH did with regard to looking after V, from noise making, to tv watching, to overestimulating her, leaving her to cry a second too long in my opinion... But I managed to relax a bit and stopped being worried or angry. He's actually brilliant with her, but I was focusing on tiny differences in parenting style. Anyway, somebody said men can be babies, and I think that's what is happening with your DH, he has not adjusted to being a dad and stills want to be the boyfriend or having you back. I don't know what to advise, though, but please don't think being on your own would solve anything. If you were to do that, you would have to leave D alone every other week with him or his family, and you said you cannot deal with being without him.
Have to go, back later.

Mrshaworth2b

I know how hard it can be talking to someone who doesn't respond, im bored of hearing my own voice at the mo but I think that I should keep repeating myself because if he thinks things are going to carry on this way if he ignores the situation he has another thing coming. All I want is some support, to not have to do all the housework and all the baby work. I didn't think it was a lot to ask but whenever I mention it I get a response like in nagging, Banama we all have our own situations at home, they are similar but different, I totally sympathise with you

morocha

Bamama, My relationship has been under a lot of stress since Jade is here too. First i think, because we have all the instics and put baby first and mean do feel jealous of it. In the first weeks i completely concentrated in my baby, My oh was having "doubts" and he concentrated in our eldest, I dont think he saw me in the same way now with me breast feeding and that, he felt weird.
My mum told me in the 2 second week after having J that i shouldnt leave my OH alone, that i still should make an effort?? and get change and wear nice things( you get the idea) etc... all of these 2 weeks after giving birth, having a child that cried day and night and only me dealing with it, i told her, i choose to concentrate in my baby during her first weeks, if he is a t**t and wants to go and find someone else, then he is the one losing out, my child will always be there for me and i choose this relationship over any men.

He got over my milky breasts now but Jade is now 3 months, it has taken time and now she does not cry much and interacts a lot, he feels a lot closer to her.

*Nutella*

Evening ladies

I think we need a big dodgy group hug :grouphug:

Hope everyone had a good day? Nothing exciting to report here - went to Sainsbury's, cleaned the bathroom, did some hoovering and two loads of laundry and had a much-needed nap. And built a lot of Duplo animals (I specialise in colourful birds), which a certain little person demolished within seconds of completion

Hubby's got man flu and is feeling sorry for himself, so I've been on Lemsip and coffee & brandy duty today. He's convinced brandy's got healing powers.

Off to bed in a minute - have a good night all x

sunshine_1988

Hi ladies

Quiet day here, went for an impromtue picnic in the local park but it was quite windy! Aiden had a good walk about though so hoping he has a good night. Oh, he did not sleep through the mortgage apt yday lol, he wrecked the guys office though! Was not good. We made the appointment to sign it off for a lunchtime when he is at nursery!

Hope everyone whos struggling with OHs is okay Ill join that group hug too.

Ohh thanks for the cereal recommendations too x


Sleep well all xxx

janninew

Hi Ladies,

Hope everyone is feeling OK, as has been said its really hard when you have a baby and it really does test your relationship. It does get easier (as most things do when it comes to babies!) I found once you get into a routine, start getting some decent sleep again you can find the time and inclination to start getting back to normal with your OH. Things are never the same again after having a baby, and I've found you do need to work hard to keep your relationship fresh. I remember the early days well with the milky boobies and the hormones!

Hope your OH feels better soon Nutella.

Hope all have a nice sleep, off to bed now.

xxx

Mrshaworth2b

Hi Banama I hope today brings a new outlook on your situation