career woman or stay at home wife

sky89line

Hi guys,

I will have a debate on it. Please help me .I need some ideas


Which one would you choose? and way?

Alikay

There are various shades of grey between the black and white you mention. It's also very personal and specific to you, your area of work and your family's circumstances.

abailey54

I think if I had the choice I would work part-time - best of both worlds really. Finance obviously pays a key part, whether you have children or not, and whether you actually enjoy your job

VfM4meplse

I can understand the concept of a SAHM but not a wife, unless there are specific caring responsibilities?

Just because you earn a wage, it doesn't mean a career is above all else. It is however a route to self-sufficiency and contributes incredibly to the earner's self-esteem not to be reliant on another financially.

Seanymph

I worked from home (was forced to after an accident) and am so pleased I did.

Up until they were 1 and 2 I did the whole day nursery dropping off, picking up, phoning irate bosses when one was sick before trying to persuade grandparents their plans for the day weren't as important as my meeting....

It was stressful, everything still seemed to fall to me (putting dinner on the table, dropping them off, picking them up) - and I didn't do anything properly any more.

When I was forced to stop working I was at home recovering, and being a 'mum' and as I got better I started working from home and ran my own business - youngest is 16 and I've JUST gone back to part time work.

I wouldn't have missed it for anything - we had six week holidays in scotland camping, spent half terms visiting friends, I was there to help with homework, take them to the cinema from school - cook dinner.

The best thing as a parent you can give your kids is your time - if you work full time I don't think there is a lot of it left.

Ok you can get a cleaner or nanny and delegate - but it's amazing how much you have you don't need - but I think your kids do need time with you.

Seanymph

*just read it again - you say 'stay at home wife' not 'stay at home mother'.

As as wife I'd work!

victory

Kids involved ? Then SAHM when they are little, career woman when they get a bit older, part time maybe in between

fluffymuffy

I stopped work as soon as I married. I was in a job I needed to leave and so it was just a convenient moment. I dived into self employment - tried a few ideas until a couple of them stuck and I've been having a career as a stay at home wife with two successful businesses for 20 years.

I'd worry about being just a wife. Even just a mother (as children grow older). As I'd have nothing to talk about to OH. Nothing to contribute financially or intellectually.

Person_one

Will your partner be a career man or a stay at home husband?

lostinrates

VfM4meplse wrote: »

I can understand the concept of a SAHM but not a wife, unless there are specific caring responsibilities?
.

And yet we stay at home wives do exist.

There are many reasons I am a sahwife but the most important and only one that matters is that it's because it works for us in our particular circumstance. In other circumstances I would have (and have) made other choices.

lostinrates

fluffymuffy wrote: »

I'd worry about being just a wife. Even just a mother (as children grow older). As I'd have nothing to talk about to OH. Nothing to contribute financially or intellectually.

not necessarily so. I contributed most of the initial capital to our marriage (not that either of us consider it matters) and intellectually far from it. Not having to fit in the demands of a traditional job I have time to read (and read and read) and keep informed, often more than my husband has. In fact, we joke it often comes down to my role to give him a potted version of the week in the news and culture.

There are many jobs which would bring in some money but leave considerably less time for intellectual pursuit, and it's difficult to accept I would be more intellectually stimulated by them simply because I was employed.