My savings ..our or my money?!

Person_one

balletshoes wrote: »

nope he couldn't - not at first anyway. He'd have to learn, in the same way I had to learn.

At a time when he's also having to deal you being critically ill or severely disabled or dead? That seems harsh when he could easily be more involved now.

balletshoes

Person_one wrote: »

At a time when he's also having to deal you being critically ill or severely disabled or dead? That seems harsh when he could easily be more involved now.

absolutely right - but thats his decision to make.

poet123

Person_one wrote: »

At a time when he's also having to deal you being critically ill or severely disabled or dead? That seems harsh when he could easily be more involved now.

My husband has never paid a bill in his life!! He would have to learn how if I wasn't here to do it. Most are on DD though, and we do have an emergency list hanging about somewhere in the event I am struck down.

Person_one

balletshoes wrote: »

absolutely right - but thats his decision to make.

So he refuses to share the responsibility?

Fair enough, not your fault, although I don't think I'd be massively happy with that situation myself.

Dunroamin

heartbreak_star wrote: »

So do we...it's just we're not particularly bothered about talking money - asking about salaries and stuff would feel like an interrogation I know some would disagree but that's just us *chuckle*

HBS x

Actually, that sounds as if you are bothered about talking about money.

Dunroamin

poet123 wrote: »

My husband has never paid a bill in his life!! He would have to learn how if I wasn't here to do it. Most are on DD though, and we do have an emergency list hanging about somewhere in the event I am struck down.

My father (old style working class) had never even had a bank account and when my mother died he relied on "those nice girls from the building society" to write out checks for him to pay the utility bills.

74jax

Person_one wrote: »

So he refuses to share the responsibility?

Fair enough, not your fault, although I don't think I'd be massively happy with that situation myself.

My parents were like that too, dad just didn't want to know.

poet123

Person_one wrote: »

So he refuses to share the responsibility?

Fair enough, not your fault, although I don't think I'd be massively happy with that situation myself.

It isn't a question of that with us, I do it because I have always enjoyed doing the financial research re accounts, mortgages etc, and bill paying by DD is hardly arduous. My husband manages a large budget at work and simply wants to switch off from that kind of thing when at home. I am happy to do it, if I wasn't, he would do his share.

shirlgirl2004

Personally I don't ask. I spent hundreds of £ on a new pet and didn't ask. I don't earn any money so I guess he'd be within his rights to moan about me spending his money. However I gave up my well paid job to look after our children and assuming I'm not spending money we don't have I don't see a problem. Ordinarily though I do mention my intentions as does he.

squirrelchops

OH has some but not a total idea of how much money I have in savings.

This is not me deliberalty witholding this information it is just that due to inheritance, house renovations and the like the money is all over the place.

Also I then have a further pot of money I put into ISAs well before we met. This is fixed for another 5 years so why worry about going on about this and adding to our joint savings when I can't or rather don't want to access it so it is irrelevent for now.

If OH asked what money do you have I would tell him.

Similarly he has 2 houses, these are his concern not mine.

If we split up I would have my house and money, he has his. Why would I want half of his stuff and vice versa when I haven't paid into his mortgage and he has no ownership over my house that I inherited.

Oh, and we aren't married and intend to stay that way but if we did get married I would ensure we both protected our finances with the focus being to provide for the child(ren). I have named him in my death in service benefit and pension and vice versa - who said love was dead?!!!!