Independent education?

SuzieSue

Person_one wrote: »

Kids know though, they're not daft.

We were all aware of exactly what was going on when about two thirds of the kids in my primary school class had parents who suddenly discovered religion in order to get them in the CofE school and then instantly lost their faith after getting the magic letter.

So what? At least the parents care enough about their children's education to ensure they get the best one available to them.

Person_one

SuzieSue wrote: »

And Tories wouldn't date you.

Jeez, lighten up!

SuzieSue

Person_one wrote: »

Are you worried that this is the first indicator of further ideological differences between you?

I'd be concerned too, I think it would be very hard to spend your life and make the big decisions with someone of a very different political perspective and general outlook.

I think the OP should only worry if her OH insists that they go to the same school as he did if she is not happy with the school.

I would also be a bit concerned about her MIL's prejudices but as long as the OP's husband is not like his mother then the OP should be fine.

Person_one

mrcow wrote: »

They may notice. But do most even care? A lot just go through the motions. My nieces are at a catholic school (they are not Catholic) and I think most of it just passes them by as they get on with their jobs of being kids.

There's no denying its an early lesson in hypocrisy.

SuzieSue

Person_one wrote: »

Jeez, lighten up!

You started it. I'm just repeating what you said, so you should tell yourself to lighten up.

SuzieSue

Person_one wrote: »

There's no denying its an early lesson in hypocrisy.

It'a an early lesson of what parents will do to get the best for their children and the children should be very grateful.

pesky85

Is it a day school or boarding? If it's the latter I would recommend waiting until secondary age before enrolling. I believe any younger can be quite stressful for a child.

If you can afford it, and you like the school, and you think your child will enjoy their time there and benefit from it; then definitely go for it.

I hate it when parents of independently educated children are pigeon-holed as being elitist / snobby. It's ignorance.

I was privately educated, and my parents were not wealthy. My father worked ridiculous amounts of overtime to pay the fees and I received a bursary from the school too. I was not treated any differently, or bullied. I had opportunities that I would never have seen at my local state school.

I will move heaven and earth to try and give my children the same opportunities, by sending them to an independent secondary school. This is despite the two state high schools in my town being Ofsted "outstanding".

That being said, I 100% agree that you get out of education what you put it. Private school does not guarantee results. What it does is push you / support you academically more than at state school, and have the best resources at your fingertips. It's more than education, it teaches you independence (especially boarding) and a huge range of extra curricular / sport activities.

I also agree that the grandmother's attitude IS elitist and you would do well to not let that rub off on the child....

Ada_Doom

SuzieSue wrote: »

And Tories wouldn't date you.

Totally agree with this Person One, you always seem far too reasoned, compassionate and intelligent in posts that I have read to attract a tory

Person_one

Ada_Doom wrote: »

Totally agree with this Person One, you always seem far too reasoned, compassionate and intelligent in posts that I have read to attract a tory

Why thank you!

tyllwyd

My OH did not come from a wealthy background, and his two older sisters were educated at state school. His mum got a job in a prep school, so with scholarships he and his brother were privately educated. All four of them did well at A level, went to university and graduated with 2:1 honours degrees and went on to get graduate level jobs in their various different professions. Twenty years on, there isn't any huge gap in what they've achieved. My OH was happy enough in his school, but there was no money for doing extra-curricular activities, and he's not one for using the old-boy network. So he had a good education, but I'm not sure long term it's made any difference to his happiness and achievement.

I know a couple of families where the kids have started off in a local public school, but finding the right school within a sensible travelling distance at secondary school level has been a nightmare.

My MIL would have loved our kids to go to public school but we just couldn't afford it, so they are going to state school and seem to be getting on fine, and I'm happy with that. I guess it's got to be a personal decision for you and your family, where you feel you fit best. (Oh, and my kids have some cousins at public school and some at private school - I don't think they even think about it for a moment, to them they are just all at different schools.)