The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 12

365days

satchmo1 wrote: »

Good luck 365, wishing you victory in your struggle.

Hugs, Satchmo xx

Thanks.

Was a brief wobble but 'getting it out there' rather than holding it in always helps. For me, drinking was always so blooming handy! Any emotion that needed squashing, drink did the job. What I've found though is that if you live a life without actually allowing yourself to feel an emotion however uncomfortable it may be (And good emotions can be uncomfortable too) There is pretty little point living.

So I need to ride this out. Like I said it's the emotion making me uncomfortable rather than a desire to drink per se.

Ramble over!

Green_Karen

365days wrote: »

Thanks.

Was a brief wobble but 'getting it out there' rather than holding it in always helps. For me, drinking was always so blooming handy! Any emotion that needed squashing, drink did the job. What I've found though is that if you live a life without actually allowing yourself to feel an emotion however uncomfortable it may be (And good emotions can be uncomfortable too) There is pretty little point living.

So I need to ride this out. Like I said it's the emotion making me uncomfortable rather than a desire to drink per se.

Ramble over!

Yes but how do you deal with emotions? As you say drink helps suppress feeling anything and I am worried about suddenly being overwhelmed. Any suggestions would be good as I am feeling a bit troubled myself at the moment with nothing I can put my finger on.

All the best getting through it.

PriceySOS

7 please, Shaggy, ta

Have a good week everybody x

365days

Green_Karen wrote: »

Yes but how do you deal with emotions? As you say drink helps suppress feeling anything and I am worried about suddenly being overwhelmed. Any suggestions would be good as I am feeling a bit troubled myself at the moment with nothing I can put my finger on.

All the best getting through it.

All below is what worked for me.

Get a counsellor. One you feel comfortable with and who has a specialism in alcohol and addiction. Talking out all the 'stuff' needs to be done. Friends, however helpful, will always have their own agenda. Get unbiased support.

I went to some AA meetings, not many. They helped but due to family, geography and timings I foudn going to a counsellor worked for me better.

Allow yourself to feel. This can be really scary at first and it can overwhelm you. But rather that than being a emotional cripple.

Get a new network. Do things that 'normal' people do. Sign up for evening classes, courses, workshops etc. You know all those things I thought only sad boring people did while I spent my evening drunk on the sofa (Oh the irony!)

Find ways to relax. Ha! easier said than done. What works for me is walking, music and gardening....yep all those 'boring' middle age things!

Know your limits and keep away from drama as much as you can. You have to look after yourself first and foremost before you try and look after anyone else.

See your GP. Tell them what you are doing.

So yesterday I....watched the rememberance parade and wept, (Excellent cover story for my son!!) took a long bath, went on a long walk, ate chocolate ice cream, and was honest on here.

Think about getting a journal. Write down anything that comes into your head. It's just for you, so don't hold back. Re reading that journal in the future may well help you a lot.

Don't lose sight of what you are choosing to do. It is scary. I felt like the brakes had been taken off my life when I stopped drinking. Totally out of control and no direction. I now realise that was what my life was like when I drank. Now I am in control and have direction.

Read read read. The internet is FULL of recovery, addiction sites.

Admit that you aren't perfect and no one is. Stop wondering when you meet people if they like you, but wonder if you like them.

I'll stop there as that's enough to be getting on with!!!

shaggydoo

Morning :hello:

2 more AFDs making an AF Weekend :A



Shaggyx

shaggydoo

November :-

= 7 Days AF

= 14 days AF

= 21 days AF

= 28 days AF

= 30 days AF

= target achieved


AlexLK 5/21

AuntyCat 2/15

Barny1979 6/23

Fruball 4/17

Gien 2/25
Green Karen 8/30

Jess The Cat 5/20

Joanne109 /15

Katzen /25

Maman 3/10
Mummyto3boys 7/27

Munchin 5/21
MrsDee 9/25

NewStart 1/10

Pippi 2/25

Pozza 6/25
PriceySOS 7/24

RosePetal 3/21

Satchmo 3/20
Shaggy 9/17

SkintDad 6/30
Stupotstu 8/25

Sukeyboo 3/12

Tracy /10


Everyone Welcome! It's never too late to join....

Please highlight your AFDs in Red

Don't hesitate to let me know if I've made a mistake!

shaggydoo

November 2013

SET YOUR

Everyone Welcome!!!

sukeyboo

Morning all,

Have just caught up with all the weekend posts - well done to all those that managed to stay AF (or drink less) :j and hugs to those that are struggling - either with the drink or other personal problems

No AFD's for me over the weekend but back to it today

Have a great Monday everyone

Green_Karen

365days wrote: »

I'll stop there as that's enough to be getting on with!!!

Thanks for all the advice and such a lot of it, it's given me a few things to think about.

I would love to get counselling, about drink and other things too, but have never known the best way to go about it. It's not the same as talking to friends who tend to say what they think you want to hear! That's on my to do list.

I have been doing all the typical 'middle aged' things since my early thirties! But as you say, it certainly beats lying on a sofa missing out on life and making assumptions about other's hobbies being sad! I think I need to do more of them. And since giving up alcohol, I have had loads more energy (mainly mental energy, the body isn't quite so willing yet!)

I know others on the Forum have mentioned that this is a difficult time of year and I find this is so true with dark nights and miserable weather, it is a difficult time to do productive things with the evenings, but try I must.

Enough for me from now.

Shaggy - on 10/30 AF days, thanks.

maman

365days wrote: »

Stop wondering when you meet people if they like you, but wonder if you like them.

Thanks so much for the advice 365. I particularly like the above, found it very empowering.

Back on the wagon today.:)

For cutters-down: I find going to a class, in my case dancing, on a Monday evening very helpful. The distraction makes it so much easier to be AF and sets the tone for the rest of the week.