What is the point?!

krlyr

My OH adds brown sauce to lots of things, even if I've put a bit in already (e.g. I add it to the gravy for better flavour). I've never taken offense to it - he just likes the taste of it and wants more of it than me, so it makes sense for him to add it to his dinner rather than me use more when cooking.
As for tasting food before adding salt, sauce, etc. - you learn your own taste, and if he's used to adding a lot, he probably knows that only adding a little won't be enough. It's a bit like sugar in tea or coffee - I used to have 3 sugars and I knew for a fact that 2 wasn't enough and I wouldn't like the taste of the tea. I could easily tell if someone had skimped on a spoon - your tastebuds are used to it a certain way. I weaned myself down slowly, so 2 and 3/4, 2 and 1/2, 2 1/4, etc. down to about 3/4 of a spoon now, so maybe you could suggest to your hubby he starts to cut down a bit (even if it's just for his diabetes rather than your feelings)
Could he perhaps be craving sugary things because of his blood sugar level and this is subconciously influencing how he seasons his dinner too? I rarely add salt to my dinner but once in a while I'll get a hankering for it and I need to have it - maybe it's part habit, part a mental 'need' for it?

Dinner going cold...well, it gets served up, OH gets called. If he doesn't come down within a minute I start eating mine and his sits there going cold. If he's late, he can eat it cold or heat it up, his choice!

coolcait

I remember once seeing an American TV show, where couples sought help from 'experts' to help resolve 'problems. I'm sure it was probably a long-running series, but one episode was enough for me.

In the episode I saw, the wife had enlisted the experts' help because of things which she disliked about the way her husband ate. They were driving her to distraction - and maybe divorce!

I can't actually remember what the husband's horrible habits were.

As I saw it, he was just eating...

The wife, however, sprinkled Sweet n Lo over her salad. In restaurants, she would order salad, and ask for packets of Sweet n Lo.

If anyone reacted in surprise, or disgust, or disbelief - or simply breathed at the wrong moment - she would snap "Don't 'yuck' my 'yum'..."

I really, really did not take to the woman. Blame it on the editing, but she came across as a self-centred, controlling cow. And the thought of sweetener on a salad makes me feel ill.

However...

I did agree with her view that no one should tell her how to eat, or how to season her food (Don't 'yuck' my 'yum')

I understand that you feel hurt that your OH 'changes' the food you have cooked - before he has even tasted it to see if it needs 'changed'.

However, if that's his 'yum', it's not meant as a criticism of your food.

It can take a while to adjust your own mindset to adapt to that idea. (My OH is another one who will add chilli sauce to anything. Except cereal. To date :eek:).

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Don't add any seasonings to it at all. Prepare it when it suits you to eat it, sit down and enjoy your hot meal, adding what you want to have in terms of salt at the table, then when he finally gets his act together, you've cleared your plate, gone to do something you want and he has food to put in the microwave or eat cold, his choice.

seven-day-weekend

Just asked my husband his opinion on this, because I could not see why it was a problem. He said it is the same as if you'd drawn a picture for someone and taken great care with it, given it to them and they had scribbled all over it. So now I can see why it might be a problem.

But then again, if it makes the meal more pleasurable to him to slosh brown sauce all over it, why should he not make it better for him?

I think it is one of those things you have to compromise on.

arbroath_lass

OP - when you eat in a restaurant or order takeaway do you both have exactly the same thing?

I expect not because you both have DIFFERENT tastes.

Just because something tastes good to you it is not necessarily how your OH likes it.