Would it be offensive to..

melbell

My best friend was injured really badly in an accident, He was in hospital for a few weeks. Now he is back home, He is having to change his bandages and clean the wounds.

I was thinking of asking if he wanted me to stay over (on the sofa!) and I could do the whole dressing and cleaning for him. He's done so much for me over the years. but he is very much "I can do it I am independant"

Would it be offensive if I was to ask? How would you ask if you was me. I met him today and it looked like he was struggling, He only gets the district nurse every few days to check on the bigger wounds.

loracan1

He can always say no!

I think, even if he does refuse, it lets him know that he can ask if he really really needs help.

tyllwyd

I can't see the harm in making the offer, as long as you won't be upset if he says no. But is there a reason why you would have to stay overnight? And are you sure that he needs to change the dressings that often - he might have been told not to disturb them too much to give the cuts a chance to heal.

melbell

What I was thinking, but didn't want to incase he took it the wrong way.

melbell

tyllwyd wrote: »

I can't see the harm in making the offer, as long as you won't be upset if he says no. But is there a reason why you would have to stay overnight?

Hes been telling me hes been having bad nights and keeps leaving his meds in the kitchen of his place. I could help him out and we could bond.

harrys_nan

I would offer to help and see what he says, he maybe ok, but would be a nice gesture.
Not sure I get the bonding comment though, LOL.

victory

Just ask him, he will appreciate the help but if he still wants to be independent just keep it light and tell him if he ever needs any help you are very happy to offer it anytime:D

melbell

harrys_nan wrote: »

I would offer to help and see what he says, he maybe ok, but would be a nice gesture.
Not sure I get the bonding comment though, LOL.

LOL

We haven't spent much time together recently. We usually do things together, Movie nights etc (I usually get scared and cuddle up to him on movies though and end up falling asleep)

I just want to do something nice for him

Beckyy

Look up the number for your local Community Nurses. IMO they should be coming round to change his dressings and check up on any wounds.

Nicki

Why not make the offer, and he'll either accept or decline.

If he declines, are there other things you could do to nurture him though? Maybe cook meals for him and leave them round, run errands, etc?

harrys_nan

ha ha, method in your madness then (only joking) :T:p

It would be nice tho he may not want to ask you, some men can be stubborn