MOOLOO'S Muddling on into 2013

duchy

I think social services are playing you Mooloo
It seems they have given you the option of having one or other of your children back -Well they are both over 18 -if you refuse then DS will end up in B&B or in a house share or a bedsit.......and maybe without the safety net he might get his act together......and would that be a bad thing ? You could say No....... to both your kids. (I don't think Twin 2 should be the one to move anyway the flat is hers and given to her due to her specific needs-DS and mate are freeloading off of that)

Might be tough love but might be better for him and also less disruptive for DGD who is the ONLY child in this situation and her needs perhaps should come first ?

Savvy_sewing

I am sorry that I have not posted for a few days.
Something terrible has happened to twin2 which I really cannot find the words to explain. I have been in many situations in my life and this ranks as the worst. Social and the police are trying to find a resolution asap to put a protection order in place for her. I tried to take her to a respite place but she wouldn't stop there.
She is also unwell with a chest infection. I got her to a doctor yesterday and he has put her on antibiotics. Hopefully they will start to work soon.

We will be in many more meetings and police interviews next week.
The police will be calling in on her every day to see she is OK and I have told her father and he said he will call in today.
Twin1 is doing quite well with ousting the kids and has with the various carer input tidied up her flat amazingly well. She has had DGD overnight for me. allowing me to get some well needed rest.
Although I am currently working my way through three black sacks of washing. Chinese laundries have nothing on me.
My Dad has helped out today by taking DS to the Blacksmiths for me. I will collect him when I go to get DGD.
I had a wobbly day yesterday between my phone calls and meetings and thought that life was really dealing us a handful of duff cards. I was extremely low. But this morning I have had a chance to relax and have a soak in the bath and take my time in getting up. This has given me time to regroup my inner self and dig up the strength to take us through the day and hopefully I will be strong enough to continue to help twin2 .
I shall be going to check up on the twins next.

Errata

This sounds absolutely dreadful, givin that your son - her brother - is living with her. I hope she gets the protection she needs, and whoever she needs to be protected from is subject to the full force of the law.

*Robin*

Many ((((((hugs)))))) Mooloo - don't know what else to say..

Savvy_sewing

He is here so she is on her own.
we wanted her to go into a safe house but she wouldn't go.
she wont so at the moment calling round is all i can do. We will be looking to rehouse her as she needs a smaller place with this bedroom tax and the council tax plus repayments that the DWP are demanding for over payments in the past.
Now i find she also has £4,000 demand for child benefit she was still in receipt of that we were not aware of. Dispite a charity that were supposed to have been helping her with her budget and benefits. I am horrified.
Safety has to be the first issue but financially she is a mess. Now she is emotionally on the edge and physically she is also so run down and she looks naturally shell shocked. in denial and i fear on the edge of a breakdown. but that's only my opinion. having been there myself many years ago.

tired_mum

Will probably be in for a flaming but here goes i actually feel sorry for your son and have to wonder if he turns to the wrong sort due to being continually second best first to the twins and their problems and then to your granddaughter very rarely is anything good said about him and yet because he lived with you you were given a 3 bed house so he does have his uses and now complaints that you may loose your sewing roomdue to his returning home maybe he is just looking for his mum to put him first for a change

Savvy_sewing

your point sounds as if i hate my son.
he is as loved as all of my children. He chooses to hang around with the wrong people no matter what he has been advised. not my opinion, all the people that have tried to help him. yet i have never closed my doors too him. yes i am frustrated at loosing my sewing room, because i had just got it sorted and the beginnings of a small business in the pipe line so that i can start to get off of the benefits.
i didn't get a three bedrooms house because of him. i got it because of DGD came to live with us. he had lived with me on and off as his defience took him. it was him who left for oxford and didnt come back.
but that doesnt mean that i dont love or want my son. I want him to grow up and be a man. he is twenty years old not 15. He had all the help i could give him but he chooses to still walk on the edge of the law. Dgd has a right to a stable life. Which i try to give her. But as long as there is breath in my body i do as much for all my children as . i have to. want to and can do.
I moved all my stuff out immediately and gave e him the room. I wouldn't let him sleep on the sofa or make him live in the shed.
I don't think that he is bad inside. He works hard when he has the opportunity. just not much here. his own dyslexic tendances have been one of his problems from his school days and that has hindered him. but he knows that he is loved and is as precious to me as anybody..

tired_mum

I didnt say you hated your son but sometimes and remember i am looking in as an outsider you seem to make sure all the rest of the family are fine but say well he is ok no disabillities etc so needs to just get on and i will spend time chasing and checking on the others not saying that you hate him at all but you are generally speaking of how the twins must come first as they have special needs and GD as she is a child
Please dont think i was saying you hated him i never even dreamed that for a moment and i am sorry you felt that i thought that

supermezzo

Tired mum - maybe today isn't the day for this?

Savvy_sewing

i suppose as this whole blog was started about the twins then most of the stuff i report is twin based. the financial and emotional stresses of my dealing with them. I don't discuss all if Biggests issues, demands and needs either.
The episode this week has made me rather raw and edgy. Twin s safety is my priority. DS is also important but the only danger he is in is his own ineptitude.