Time to stop pretending it will be ok!

julie2710

fatbelly wrote: »

Don't rush to close it. A decent 0% deal should be possible

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showpost.php?p=62279211&postcount=1623

Thanks for that! It is an MBNA card so I will see what I can do

MiMi66

julie2710 wrote: »

My dad clearly favours DS1 which is bad enough in itself but he then compounds it by picking on DS2 constantly. He can be quite nasty with it sometimes and both myself and my auntie have mentioned it to him before. Well DS1 decided to attack DS2 with a pole while he was sat in the chair outside. So I tell DS1 off and my dad comes in and starts shouting at DS2, pointing in his face. I have to say I was pretty angry and I'm not proud at what I did but I ended up shouting at my dad. Not good in front if the kids and I was also bought up to respect parents but I'm just fed up of the way he picks on DS2. He has smacked him before now. Anyway, the long shot is I ended up walking out. I'm still pretty angry about the whole thing to be honest.

Hi Julie , Just wanted to say how much I identified with that experience - I have exactly the same issues with my mother who is deeply critical of my younger child - last year it came to a head, after a huge argument I univited her for Chirstmas and had a 6 month no contact gap - no phone call - nothing - it was the best thing for the relationship and I have to say I think my mother learnt a lesson in boundaries - she's not changed, but has learnt to bite her lip and not be offensive and overtly critical. My two children, teens, were so pleased I had taken a stance as they are old enough to see what was happeninig. Anyway - nothing to do with debt, but all to do with boundareis and I can't help but think that financial debt is just another expression of poor boundaries - and I so include myself in that statement - so go for it and don't accept anything less than good interactions and behaviour from your parents and put in the boundaries to support that. They may not like it but they will respect you for it, even if they never tell you - parental approval is over rated! Self respect is much more reliable.

julie2710

Thanks MiMi66. My Auntie and Uncle had a bit of a go at my parents too and they seem to have been better since. I've no doubt it will happen again at some point but I will stick to my guns over this.

Well I have repaired my Hoover :j I had been putting it off and putting it off but it got to the point where I had to do it. So searched YouTube, found a video and dismantled it, washed filters, let them dry and its all back together and working fantastically so a few £ saved

Weather hasn't been great today so I've cleaned the sofa. Cream leather, purchased before two small boys Hot soapy water and a cloth though and it's now gleaming

I've decided that this week I am putting the tent up in the garden and we can all sleep in there as the weather is going to be good. If we can't go away for the week as I'm working then we will have a holiday at home! At least I won't have to pack anything Still have loads of fence painting to get done, so hoping to get some of that done too, would love to have it all done this summer. The down side of a corner plot

I really can't believe how quickly the summer holidays have gone. Still need to buy shoes for the boys but that's going to have to wait until payday!

Right ebaying I think! I really really must get it done!!

bess1234_2

Oh yes. You are now an official member of the " why didn't I know I was supposed to clean the filters club":T:T:T:T

julie2710

bess1234 wrote: »

Oh yes. You are now an official member of the " why didn't I know I was supposed to clean the filters club":T:T:T:T

Embarrassing isn't it? I couldn't believe how bad the filter was! I could literally pick off what looked like a second filter made of dust

Still, I'm an expert now! Won't make that mistake again!

boo2410

Just read this thread from the beginning, I did start to read it ages ago then found it again tonight so have now subscribed. Just want to say you are amazing and a real role model.

I don't know how you manage to fit everything in that you do and still stay so upbeat. You are a great Mum and as your boys get older they will really appreciate all you have done and will continue to do for them.

Here's to you and your ever decreasing debts :beer::beer:

julie2710

Thank you Boo2410. I'm really bad when it comes to being patient with getting the debts down. Its probably the thing that has the biggest impact on my mood which makes me all the more determined to sort it out once and for all.

My boys are amazing and keep me going and wear me out in equal measures.

Coming on here helps too. The support is great, it reminds me of where I started and much as I don't want anyone else going through what I'm doing, it does help to realise I'm not the only one

julie2710

Well another busy day today. I was considering taking the boys to a "beach party" at the caravan park on the other side of the town I live in but they weren't behaving that well this morning, so they got to stay at home instead .

Got them busy making bread and a cheesecake this morning. After lunch they played in the garden while I did some dusting and more cleaning. Then painted the windows on the office at the end of the garden. The person who invented one coat gloss should be ashamed of themselves! Should be done under trade descriptions! Anyway first coat done and will need another one!

After tea we got the bikes out and went along the seafront. DS1 wanted to stop off in the BMX park. He managed three laps before he fell off twice, so we headed home via my parents for a quick juice. Oh, and DS1 & 2 decided to eat them out of fruit! 4 nectarines and 2 bananas between them. They had had 3 apples between them before we went out as their pudding :eek:

Boys in bed and I've cooked some sausage rolls and little sausages for lunch snacks this week. Also made the mistake of re-starting on family tree investigation! Love it but it's so time consuming! Really should head to bed now. Maybe a cuppa first

julie2710

Well day two of what is proving to be a wet bank holiday weekend, coffee in hand and time to update and refocus.

Pay day is almost here. Bonus is listed on my payslip but unfortunately I'm going to have to use that for the school fees Next week I will be clearing that lowest card :j I'm torn as to which one to start on next. To be honest the highest one is the one getting on my nerves the most as the interest is ludicrous so although its not going to look as impressive I think that will be my next target. I've also had a letter from the CSA setting out the payments that I should be receiving and when. They are going to take arrears so the first 6 payments will be of over £300 On the downside the first payment was scheduled for mid October :eek: After speaking to them though they explained that it is coming directly out of his wages so that should (hopefully) ensure that it does actually get paid. I've decided that I've managed this far without it so I'm going to pretend I don't even get it and pay it straight off a card. That should make a bit of a quicker dent

It's not been a cheap week this week I've been trying to get the last few items for start of school. Swimming trunks for DS1 (the school have their own branded so £8.50 ) Indoor trainers for both, to be fair they don't get a lot of wear so Tescos at £5 each, outdoor trainers, which do get more wear £10 Clarks outlet. DS1 needed a new branded PE top £20 :eek: Then the dreaded school shoes. I bought Clarks as my two don't grow that fast and I've generally managed to get them to last the year. Still £62 though for the two, good job my boys look after their stuff

Right baking day today I think and if they drive me too mad wellie boots and a muddy puddle search

satchmo1

Hi Julie

When (many moons ago) my boys were at fee paying schools, the school used to have a shop run by the Parents Assn. Outgrown kit and uniform was sold, and because so many of the boys outgrew items before they had much wear, it was possible to get bargains. I especially remember getting cricket whites and shin pads, as they have a very short season.

I've no idea whether the donating parents got a percentage of the sale - if they did, then it could be a source of some money for you perhaps?

If your school doesn't have such a shop, perhaps you could suggest they start one?