Not 'doing' Santa - part two

Poppy9

pipkin71 wrote: »

I see it more as sharing what she did without wanting to get into a heated discussion.

Just as we all parent in our own ways, we all use the forums in our own ways too and who is anyone else to say it is wrong, unless it is causing harm?

Skintchick is not responsible for those who abuse rather than debate and I'm not surprised she doesn't want to enter into that sort of discussion.

I am also happy to discuss my parenting and will defend to the death on a thread rather than back away, but we are not all alike.

I understand what you are saying but OP knew it was a hot topic, as from her opening line

skintchick wrote: »

I thought, seeing as the other thread was so hotly debated, people might be interested in how Christmas without Santa worked for us?

Many of us start threads for various reasons, but if we choose to share something on a public forum it's going to attract extreme opinions as well as the more measured ones and we have to be prepared for that.

If the OP had said on her first post, you are free to discuss but I am taking no part in the discussion then at least you could decide whether you wished to debate with other forum members or maybe talk to yourself if no one else deemed it worth a reply.

Re abusive posters, they are on every thread and most people just ignore them and don't give them the attention they seek. I personally stopped coming on this forum a few years ago because there was one particular poster who seemed to actively seek to disagree and be personal about anything I posted. I knew she was doing it on purpose and sometimes if I was bored I would deliberately make a post that she had previously taken a stand was correct but then she would attack me as being wrong. I would wait until she had dug a big hole for herself before pointing it out!:D I got bored of coming down to her level and being so childish so moved on!:rotfl:

That's the thing with forums though, they attractive when you are bored and sometimes it's good to argue the opposite view point just for the sake of it as it makes you look at life with a more balanced approach. I enjoy doing it with my 17 yr old DD when she is ranting about an issue and I try to get her to consider all factors. At the end of the day I might agree with her rant but I want her to understand that there can be implications of a situation.

Gavin83

RadoJo wrote: »

Also 'any other religious minority' - I hope it's just the way you've worded it, but belief in santa or otherwise is not a religion and is not afforded the same protection that a religious belief is.

It's still a belief system just without the title. Both involve believing in something that may or may not be real, but there is no actual evidence for. The difference is that adults don't generally believe in santa. I certainly don't consider 'santa' a religion but I saw the posters point. Both should be given the same level of respect. Sorry if this offends anyone but it was an appropriate topic to put it.

While I wouldn't tell my child santa doesn't exist I find the reason not to of upsetting other children and parents frankly laughable. There is no reason the OP should continue with something they don't believe in just because everyone else does. A word with the child to make sure they don't mention it in class is needed but I'm sure they've already done that.

peachyprice

ska_lover wrote: »

You stand by the courage of your convictions, even though people are insinuating you are a bad parent, and calling you a lunatic. How very closed minded they are. I wonder if they go around calling members of other faiths bad parents for spoiling the magic of christmas by not celebrating it at all?

But that's the whole realson she's getting flamed on this thread, she hasn't stood by her own convictions, she's been a total hypocrite.

On the other thread she stood loud and proud about how she wasn't doing santa, about how parents who do are lying to their children and how wrong that is, how wrong the commercialism of christmas is blah blah blah. Which is fine, it's her family and her choice.

But she then starts a thread about how she did a santa sack (how can you do a santa sack if you're not doing santa?), sprinkled fairy dust on a bag (sorry, is making your child believe that by sprinking fairy dust on a bag presents will magically appear not lying?) and did her own little poem that was all about her daughter getting a sack full of presents.

THAT is why she's getting a hard time from alot of posters on this thread, it has nothing to do with her choice to not do santa.

Her right to be a hypocrite is the only conviction she's had the courage to stand by and for one so vehemently opposed to lying, it's nothing to be proud of.

Errata

Executive summary: I told my toddler not to believe in one lot of mumbo jumbo and told them to believe in another lot of mumbo jumbo instead.

Sambucus_Nigra

Errata wrote: »

Executive summary: I told my toddler not to believe in one lot of mumbo jumbo and told them to believe in another lot of mumbo jumbo instead.

.whilst also making her look like a fool at school.

Poppy9

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

.whilst also making her look like a fool at school.

But belief in FC can also make them look a fool at school. When DD was in Y7 one of her group of friends still believed in FC!! Now that was embarrassing!

Sambucus_Nigra

Poppy9 wrote: »

But belief in FC can also make them look a fool at school. When DD was in Y7 one of her group of friends still believed in FC!! Now that was embarrassing!

Yes, that is true. But at 3 and a half, she's got a fair few years to deal with being the only girl in the class who doesn't believe.

kettlefish

Your Christmas sounds fab, skintchick. Your little girl sounds like she had a lovely time. We have written our thankyou cards this morning, which means it really is all over for another year

However, it sounds like you went just as all-out on the magic and presents, which I think were the major aspects of FC which were disliked by the anti-Santas on the previous thread, as those who choose tell their little ones about FC / Santa; probably more so than some! As children, we never did any magic dust or spells, and my little girl won't be doing so either, although we are "believers" in this house.

What's all the sniping about when we all want the same for our kids - for them to have magical, memorable Christmasses? Does it really matter if it's a man in a red suit coming down the chimney, mummy and daddy aided by pixies or magic dust which makes the stockings fill up?

victory

What happens when the 3.5 yr old watches tele? All the shows have Santa in them, all the songs have Santa in them, shopping centres, store fronts,Xmas cards he is everywhere when the little one goes back to primary and all the kids are talking about Santa will the child be able to join in or spoil it from everyone else by telling them he is not real and does not exist?

victory

What about all the other magic or fibs we try to keep our kids believing in like the tooth fairy or mystical magical kids stories that they enjoy so much and get off happily to sleep with?