Lunch with Colleagues - don't know what to do

meritaten

oh do tell! love great stories!

EstherWillows

I work in a supermarket and someone kept eating my late night tea which I had put behind from lunch before my break meaning I used to end up with no food. Not a big deal, I assumed it was a mistake for the first few times and got something out the vending machine. Turns out that person was stealing from the business and was fired for it. I should have said something as the company lost a lot of money from it. Petty thieves are also the ones doing the big fraud!! Say something!!

tara747

lyster101 wrote: »

The above is disgusting. In both situations. I'd advise leaving these people well alone. As a good friend of mine said "sometimes, you need to leave some people behind."

I've been the single person in situations like this and now as a part of a of 'couple' am aware of both sides so remain considerate. After all the, ahem, 'benefits' of being in a couple, to seek a financial advantage like this is crass and selfish. Couples, ultimately, do just fine via the tax system as it is.

As for being stolen from in general, I have a great story to tell MSE but will wait to be approached!

Go on!


p.s. the tax system thing, what are the advantages? Just wondering as I'm newly married, is there something I'm missing out on?

wapow

So what did happen in the end OP? Did you manage to tell everyone that shes a TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!

YORKSHIRE_GUY

If you confront her yourself or get a group of people together, you would leave yourself open to an accusation of bullying. You need to pass this to a manager who would probably take advice from HR.

joehoover

Deleted_User wrote: »

I've been in a very similar situation... I went to a wedding earlier this year quite far away and was sharing car hire with two couples, so there were 5 of us.

Petrol money came to £80. Between 5 of us, that should be £16 each. When we were putting our money in, the 'head' girl who was organising everything told me I owed about £26. I asked why, and she said I should imagine her and her fiance as 'one', and the other couple as 'one', so we're each paying a third.

It was a bit of an uncomfortable situation where no one came to my rescue, but I was unsure as to why I should pay more than everyone else, just because I was a singleton. When I pointed it out, I could tell the girl wanted to put up a fight and started looking uncomfortably at everyone else. But she backed down thankfully so we each paid our fair share. Surely I'm not being unreasonable here?!

She thought they should be one?! Did they sit on each others laps the whole trip! Maybe they should also have been given one meal to share during dinner still on each others laps. I can imagine the toast where they are both holding the one glass of champagne. What is with some people behaving in such a way that is devoid of common sense and honesty.

Brian_Steele

Perhaps your manager could put out feelers - either a circular or if a small team, ask publicly - saying that the restaurant had been in touch asking what was wrong with the service, as there had been no tip left. As everyone there would know that a tip actually was left, then either the waitress or the staff member is on the fiddle.

That way everyone will know what she did (and she will know that), and management can keep an eye on her in the future.

When I was at university, I went out with a club for a curry every Thursday night and after the same person sorted the bill every time, we were always short by about one curry. As we had always all had a few beers by then, it took a few years to twig what he was doing. It's as much about a cohesive team as it is about the £20.

JayD

My advice is:

Get a copy of the receipt, tell your colleagues, show them the proof and then arrange for a group of you to confront her. Don't do it alone and be sure to have sound evidence to back your accusation. Then tell her she is NOT welcome at any of your work get togethers ever again!

londonlydia

The thing is, life is full of a mix of people: horrible ones, nice ones, happy ones, miserable ones, sly ones, charitable ones. Noone can change that, other than the people themselves.

I mention this because personally I choose to conduct myself how I see fit. I go out of my way to be nice, do lots of voluntary work, and help others. Sometimes, people have taken advantage of this, or they're not 'good people' in return. But rather than get hung up on seeing that person get commpuance, I go to bed happy knowing I've conducted myself in a good way and haven't sunk to their level. You get over people doing these things a lot quicker than you do guilt or thinking you've comprimise dyour own moral code.

So in this situation, I would have to say it does look like she's pocketed it, but you dont know for certain (maybe she thought service charge had been added already and didnt check the cash). BUT, what can you do? I would pay the extra, so my conscience was at rest to the waitress, and spoken to the colleague straight away to say that she had accidentally not paid the right amount, but that I had paid the difference to the restaurant. If she then offered sort it out, then that would be good, means she's not a thief etc...if she doesn't, well clearly she's got a questionable nature. Feel good about paying the tip yourself, and move on.

juliamarsh

I do hope that Gibson changes her mind and decides to do something about Thingy - it is outrageous behaviour and she shouldn't be allowed to get away with it. I can appreciate why she should not be the one to approach Thingy in view of their past history, but maybe somebody else could or they could speak to her collectively. How can it be seen as bullying - just say to her, calmly and without accusation, we agreed that we would leave £150 but the restaurant only received £116, please make up the balance so that we can give it to the restaurant staff. It seems simple and straightforward to me. No need even to explain how they know or that Gibson went back to the restaurant -Thingy knows perfectly well what she has done.

As to the other comments about people in a couple only expecting to pay for one of them, do they suddenly turn into one person instead of two just because they are an item? What bizarre logic!! And as for the couple who stuck their drinks on the bill for everyone else to pay for but objected to chipping in for the wine, aren't people like that SO irritating?! I have been in situations like that too where people merrily drink G&Ts or whatever but then say 'Oh no, I didn't have any wine'. I am more than happy to split the bill in these group situations but people analysing the exact cost of what they have had to the nth degree and conveniently forgetting to include their drinks or the tip have peeved me so much that if anyone starts it next time I am going to whip out my calculator and work out the exact cost of what I have had (tip & drinks included of course) and leave just that, sounds extreme I know but I am sick to death of putting in way over my share to subsidise people who try to wriggle out of paying their way!
On that note, Merry Christmas to one and all!!:)