Daughter Growing Up

Sus1e

My advice would be to give her a makeup bag with spare knickers, pads etc in to put in her school bag.

Also, sit down with her to answer any questions.

When she does start them, how about getting her a special present like a charm bracelet / charm or pendant to celebrate "growing up"?

A special mum + Daughter treat day to choose the present might be good - it is a special thing and if treated as that rather than something to be ashamed about then I think it will be fine.

FatVonD

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

Like chickens, women and girls have eggs inside them. Human eggs aren't hard-shelled like chicken eggs. They're a bit yucky and messy and sticky and bloody. But that's ok. That's normal for people.
Just like a chicken, women and older girls need to get these eggs out. That's called a period, as it happens roughly once a month. Mummy has them. Auntie X has them, etc. You will have them one day.
We don't want the yucky stuff going everywhere, so we use pads.

Sorry but far too many negative words for my liking there, way to make her feel like it's something disgusting and dirty!

I also think it's wrong to describe it as a bloody egg (??) what's wrong with 'the uterus stores some extra blood in its lining in case a baby implants and when it's not needed it sheds the blood'?

Person_one

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

Does she know that female chickens lay eggs?

Like chickens, women and girls have eggs inside them. Human eggs aren't hard-shelled like chicken eggs. They're a bit yucky and messy and sticky and bloody. But that's ok. That's normal for people.
Just like a chicken, women and older girls need to get these eggs out. That's called a period, as it happens roughly once a month. Mummy has them. Auntie X has them, etc. You will have them one day.
We don't want the yucky stuff going everywhere, so we use pads. These are the ones Mummy uses. Mummy will get you some soon, so we're ready for when it happens.

I think that's all she needs to know at this point in time.

I think the girl's 9. Have you met any 9 year olds recently? If you talked to them like this they'd look at you like you'd grown an extra head!

JimmyTheWig

FatVonD wrote: »

Sorry but far too many negative words for my liking there, way to make her feel like it's something disgusting and dirty!

Fair point.
My take is that it is a bit yucky, but it's ok to be a bit yucky.
Wouldn't want to explain it as all sweetness and light and then when she gets hers for her to find out that it is a bit yucky.
But each to their own.

JimmyTheWig

Person_one wrote: »

I think the girl's 9. Have you met any 9 year olds recently? If you talked to them like this they'd look at you like you'd grown an extra head!

Yes, I think I was talking more at a 5-year-old level.
But it's easy to olden it up a bit.
My point was that it can be talked about innocently.

Person_one

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

Yes, I think I was talking more at a 5-year-old level.
But it's easy to olden it up a bit.
My point was that it can be talked about innocently.

I don't even understand where 'innocence' comes into it.

What about a natural process that happens to (nearly) every woman makes somebody less innocent? What are they 'guilty' of?

JimmyTheWig

Person_one wrote: »

I don't even understand where 'innocence' comes into it.

What about a natural process that happens to (nearly) every woman makes somebody less innocent? What are they 'guilty' of?

I think you're agreeing with me.

It was the OP who was worried that by telling her daughter about periods her daughter would be losing her innocence.
My point was that that doesn't have to be the case.

Person_one

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

I think you're agreeing with me.

It was the OP who was worried that by telling her daughter about periods her daughter would be losing her innocence.
My point was that that doesn't have to be the case.

What I don't understand is how it would ever be the case.

JimmyTheWig

Person_one wrote: »

What I don't understand is how it would ever be the case.

Oh, I see what you mean.
That's a question for the OP rather than me, but I guess that with periods, baby making and sex being intrinsically linked, some might think that a discussion about periods would necessarily involve a discussion about sex.

Chakani

OP, please don't put off talking about it because you don't want her to lose her innocence - I had started my periods a while before the "class talk" - long enough that I was using tampons in preference to towels, I remember being annoyed that the freebies were towels!

I would have been terrified had I not known what was happening when I started, especially as no-one else was going through it at the same time. Luckily my mum had warned me...