Long distance relationships- it's all faling apart

jen007

OP can I ask what the living arrangements are for DD when you go there?
Does she have a room of her own which she is comfortable in?

Can you and OH decorate this into a room for her? (I mean as much as a 6 year old girls room should be. Stereotypical pink with sparkley things. Give DD free range -in a MSE budget ).
Edit. Not to move in the now and i'd explain that to DD in a way she understands, but to make DD a lot more comfortable when she is there.

If he doesn't want to, i'd say he isn't wanting to make a long term commitment to you and your daughter. And that is the point where I would question the relationships longevity.

Errata

8 months isn't very long. Have you and he ever been together without your DD being there?

FattyBettyBoo

OP can I ask what the living arrangements are for DD when you go there?

Manchild lives with his Mummy! HE moved back in when his last relationship ended 2 years ago and has stayed as he doesn't earn enough to live alone in London.

His Dad died 9 months ago and he and his mum live in a 4 bed house. They hardly see each other tbh. DD has a room when we stay there and his mum said we could move in if and when we wanted to.

balletshoes

I agree, 8 months really isn't very long at all. It doesn't need to be make-or-break at this stage, it really doesn't.

Your OH does sound immature though, sorry.

FattyBettyBoo

8 months isn't very long. Have you and he ever been together without your DD being there?

Usually 1 weekend a month its just the 2 of us

balletshoes

FattyBettyBoo wrote: »

Manchild lives with his Mummy! HE moved back in when his last relationship ended 2 years ago and has stayed as he doesn't earn enough to live alone in London.

His Dad died 9 months ago and he and his mum live in a 4 bed house. They hardly see each other tbh. DD has a room when we stay there and his mum said we could move in if and when we wanted to.

:eek: - whole new kettle of fish!

FattyBettyBoo

If I hadn't have said he was 34 you would just assume he was 18 wouldn't you

onlyroz

Could you and your daughter maybe go and spend a few weeks with him (e.g. during the school Christmas holidays or something) and spend the time really deciding if you have a long-term future together? I think it would be madness uprooting your whole life to relocate in London if you're both not absolutely sure that this relationship is "the one".

JimmyTheWig

balletshoes wrote: »

I agree, 8 months really isn't very long at all. It doesn't need to be make-or-break at this stage, it really doesn't.

I think it's make-or-break at this stage because the current arrangement doesn't seem to be working.
They can't go on like they are. Something needs to change, one way or the other.

Errata

FattyBettyBoo wrote: »

If I hadn't have said he was 34 you would just assume he was 18 wouldn't you

I certainly wouildn't. There are plenty of single men his age living in London the way he does.