Frugal frump to Fab - Astonishing Autum Exquinox to Wondrous Winter Solstice

lessonlearned

maman wrote: »

I love my brother dearly but....he and I have followed very different paths since we were children and I find we live in very diferent worlds. I was talking to DH about it today. It's uncannily very like our DDs. Both have degrees, one has a very demanding job the other chooses to work as a part-time cleaner. DH said I wouldn't have been happy doing something that wasn't intellectually stimulating. I was questioning who was the biggest mug!

Have a good weekend all, hoping poorlies get to feel better soon.

I recently read a very interesting book entitled "The case for working with your hands" by Matthew Crawford. He is a noted American academic, a senior lecturer who has a sideline business as a motor cycle mechanic.

He talks about the very nature of work and the future of employment. He makes some fascinating observations about where society is heading in a post industrial world and who are likely to be the winners in an increasingly difficult world of work.

Re the different paths your brother and yourself have taken and the difference between your daughters chosen lifestyles. My sons are chalk and cheese. They are both highly intelligent but they do have different skill sets and interests.

One is a natural academic, a gifted sportsman (despite moderate asthma), and a real life and soul of any party. The other is quiet, arty and dreamy, hates sport of any sort, is a gifted musician and photographer.

As long as your daughter is happy that's all that really matters. You never know she might wake up one day and decide that she wants the big career after all. Rather than taking the standard career path working for an employer she might be one of those who suddenly hits mid-life and decides she wants to set up her own business and do it on her own terms.

I wouldn't call you a mug by any stretch of the imagination. You had an enjoyable and stimulating career which made you happy. That's what counts.

lessonlearned

WelshWoofer wrote: »

Flipping eck! How quick was that! Congratulations! Hope it all goes well. And a job offer - things are looking up!

I know. Looks like all that hard work paid off.

However, mustn't count my chickens just yet. I never regard a property as sold until the money is in the bank. :rotfl:

I will consider it a done deal once contracts are exchanged.

Hewie29

well I'm offically a big fat wimp:rotfl: I had to have an Mri scan tonight as I have problems with my neck and just needed to be checked out that its nothing serious. I went in and led on the scanner and they wheeled me in and I just couldn't handle it. Pressed me buzzer to be taken straight out.

I did manage to be persauded back in and managed to stay there with my eyes shut and they got 80% of what they needed before I had to get out.

Just never realised that you were so close to the top of the scanner and it felt so tight and the noise was so loud.

Anyway it gave my dad something to laugh about which is good.

Can I just say once again that I am so grateful to everyone who has sent best wishes and advice, its all gone in my head and will be used when needed. Its so nice to know that virtual strangers take time out for each other. And for those of you that have offered private messages, I will take you up on the offers as and when needed. You are all :A.

Well done LL on getting an offer on your house.

Hope you all have a good weekend, take care xxxx

Bitsy_Beans

Hewie I've never had an MRI but family member have and they are incredibly daunting equipment. Not sure I could cope with the claustrophobia of the tunnel so you're not a big fat wimp xxx well done for doing what you did xx

LL not sure I will ever consider house sale a done deal until the money has been received. For me exchanging contracts doesn't seem to mean much these days......


Nowt to report here. Cold still hanging about. Supposed to be off out tonight with H for a bite to eat and see Skyfall. I think we need the break, DS got himself into a right state last night due to his ASD and anxiety and from what I can hear upstairs DD is being a little madam

lessonlearned

Exchange of contracts is when the sale should become legal and binding. Or at least it did when I worked in the industry. Has something changed. Is "exchange" less binding than it was.

Are people backing out after exchange these days. I have noticed that more and more people are exchanging and completing on the same day. Perhaps that is why.

Personally I would find that very awkward. It makes it even more difficult to arrange things such as removals meter readings etc. because everything is up in the air so much and you could incur a lot of costs that way.

Normally, once you have exchanged contracts then you can only wriggle out of the sale by paying a very hefty financial penalty - usually 10% of the purchase price, plus fees and costs incurred and if your solicitor is on their toes, some compensation too.

This way you can have a week or between exchange and completion to get things done. That's what I'm aiming for.

A Solicitor is legally obliged to dot and cross all the "i's and t's". If your Solicitor let's you exchange and things are not right and the sale collapses they can be sued for malpractice. This is why I would never advise anyone to attempt their own conveyancing to cut costs. If you do it yourself you have no legal redress if you make a mistake.

I would also advise anyone to check and double-check what "the professionals" are doing. You do need to keep a very close eye on things.

Bitsy - thanks for the tip. I will definitely look into this and make sure that I am extra vigilant.

Hewie - my poor OH has to have regular MRI scans. I agree they look incredibly daunting.

Well I woke up this morning in a mild state of panic. I need to ring the EA to accept the offer. It is slowly dawning me just how much stuff I have.

I shall be renting for a while before I buy, so I'm a bit at a loss as to what I should keep and what to dispose of. Perhaps I should take a leaf out of my friends book and get rid of the lot.:rotfl:

It's tempting.

One thing for sure is that I don't fancy the idea of paying for storage. So my thinking is I rent a 3 bed property, preferably with a garage. I really fancy a nice swanky 2 bed apartment but I have a 4 bed house with a loft that is groaning and a garage which is choc-a-block. The joke is - apart from the furniture which is easy to whittle down - at least 50% of the extraneous clutter and stuff belongs to my sons.;)

I think some serious car booting is required.

Well I feel like a baby heffalump at the moment. According to the scales there is no change but I certainly don't feel that my weight has stayed the same.:(

I know it's rather pathetic of me but the healthy eating and exercising just seems to keep flying out of the window at the moment.

And I've still done nothing for Christmas yet.

Hellllppppp.

Have a fab weekend.

Cherryprint

LL - wow, congrats! Stuff is happening for you so quickly now - that's amazing. If you threaten your sons with a car boot sale of their stuff, it will sort them out. My parents have threatened to chuck my stuff out in the New Year and it's motivating me to sort it, funnily enough (I've got stuff in my old room even though I left home ten years ago!! :eek: )

Last night I started going through my clothes again - don't worry bratz, I'm getting there! I tried lots of different things on together and realistically decided what I will wear and what goes with other stuff (I tend to wear a lot of the same things together and want more variety from things - a capsule style wardrobe). This is my second round of going through my wardrobe, so it's looking a lot better these days.

Has anyone dyed their clothes before? I'm thinking of doing this but scared I'll screw it up!

It's time to finally use my sewing machine to mend/amend clothes so I can actually wear them (I have about ten things in a 'mending' pile that have been there forever :eek:)! So my challenge this weekend is to learn how to use my sewing machine and not stitch my fingers together. :rotfl: I went through a phase of buying work skirts from M&S but they are super frumpy and I think they will look better if I shorten them.

I'm still really positive and loving decluttering all areas of my life! One I've done my clothes, I might start on my books. I love having physical books, but I probably have about twenty or so books that I could swap for ones I really want, so I may try bookmooch.

Have a great day all!

evilsquid1603

just to let you all know, i spoke to the boss. they realised there was a "dynamic' between us but agree with me and dont want to rock the boat unless we absolutely have to in case it gets worse.

the system we have for allocating work is shocking and they are taking my ideas on board to make an open and transparent one, turns out were manic cz i went through a phase of having no work and was always asking for stuff so theyve now all found things to give me to keep me busy and thought they were doing me a favour without realising everyone else was doing the same thing! theres confusion over if our boss really is supposed to be our boss too and they are clarifying once and for all. they have also told her to make an effort to be helpful if we ask, remember that we are brand new and will ask things she sees as "silly" questions and to wind her neck in and not get herself stressed and involved with our when she doesnt need to be. They said she certainly didnt give an indication of not liking me and they think it may just be i was in the wrong place at the wrong time. obv they have said if all these issues are sorted out and it still continues, to let them know.

lessonlearned wrote: »

One thing for sure is that I don't fancy the idea of paying for storage. So my thinking is I rent a 3 bed property, preferably with a garage. I really fancy a nice swanky 2 bed apartment but I have a 4 bed house with a loft that is groaning and a garage which is choc-a-block. The joke is - apart from the furniture which is easy to whittle down - at least 50% of the extraneous clutter and stuff belongs to my sons.;)

an apartment sounds nice! ive loved the ones ive been in, we had a brill one over two floors and a big shared balcony cz we were the top two floors a few yeas ago. needed cosmetic work doing to it but if itd had been done up itd be a lovely little "house"! had amazing views of bonfire night too! we sat outside with hot chocolate and watched the fireworks and chavs accidentally setting things on fire when their fireworks went wrong.

our last one was an old mill in the centre of town, had big lofty rooms and exposed brickwork. was a nightmare for the dust though!

With all the stuff, can you not sit them down and say you have a moving date, you dont have space to take it and that they need to come and see what they have there, and whatever is still left by a certain date, you will have to assume they no longer want/need and it will have to go?

EDIT: completely forgot to say, got stuck in town as i missed a train on thurs so had a quick mooch around next as my work pants are on the verge of falling down of their own accord they are now so big! got a lovely new top and 2 pairs of pants that were a size down in petites :j had a very fab friday wearing my new clothes!

WelshWoofer

Afternoon ladies !
Finally have 5 mins to sit down and catch up.

Now this is going to sound a bit odd - certainly feels odd saying it - I feel fab! I've lost another 1 lb (just 1 away from the 9 and and half stone goal now), I looked at myself naked in the full length mirror this morning and for the first time ever thought I looked ok. Now I'm by no means perfect (there are still lots of things I'd change but would mean surgery:eek:) but for 40 I think I look ok. My cellulite is almost all gone - have had it for years - just shows it was pure flab really - my skin looks ok and I look fairly toned. I've never ever felt ok about my body and its very very strange to look at it and think its not that bad. The exercise has paid off and finally I seem to be a shape I'm happy with. I've celebrated by splurging on some new nice slinky undies - matching bras and knickers in nice vibrant colours - a massive change from the M&S packs of 5!:p

Been to have my eyebrows done this morning and they're a big improvement - waxed instead of threading (the last time was utter torture!). Also done a quick 4K run and walked the dog.


Now I'm going to tell you a little secret ...... ssshhh!
I'm going on a sort of date next weekend:eek:
I'm quite nervous but have known the bloke for 20 odd years (since university) and we've kept in touch and have always been long distance friends but this is a step into the unknown for me. How do you do this now? At my age!:rotfl:

I'm not bothered about having a boyfriend so if it doesn't work out there's nothing lost really.
Who knows.... I may go all French and take a lover, no sock washing or tidying up after...... Think thats a bit extreme, but still, I'm happy on my own so a bit of male company is a bonus not essential.;)

Anyway, need to do a bit of fabbing tonight - defuzz, scrubs etc - need to keep on top of it.

Have a good weekend
xx

lessonlearned

WelshWoofer wrote: »

Now I'm going to tell you a little secret ...... ssshhh!
[SIZE=1I'm going on a sort of date next eekend:eek://SIZE]
I'm quite nervous but have known the bloke for 20 odd years (since university) and we've kept in touch and have always been long distance friends but this is a step into the unknown for me. How do you do this now? At my age!:rotfl:

I'm not bothered about having a boyfriend so if it doesn't work out there's nothing lost really.
Who knows.... I may go all French and take a lover, no sock washing or tidying up after...... Think thats a bit extreme, but still, I'm happy on my own so a bit of male company is a bonus not essential.;)

Anyway, need to do a bit of fabbing tonight - defuzz, scrubs etc - need to keep on top of it.

Have a good weekend
xx

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Good for you, how exciting. Hope you have a wonderful time.

As for going all French and taking a lover - well why not. You're young free and single.

Life is for living.

Glad to hear you feel so good about yourself too.

Sounds like we almost have another graduate for Fab School.

With distinction and honours by the sound of it.

As for the undies - well what can I say. You can't beat some lovely lingerie for making you feel special.

I know they are not in the same league - hardly Agent Provocateur :rotfl: - but I'm so glad I bought myself some decent nightshirts last week. My old nightwear was an absolute disgrace. I know it's only me and no-one gets to see me in my fab new nightshirts but they make me feel good.

A nice quiet evening is planned....with a very simple supper.

It's a bit of a Saturday night tradition in our house. The boys used to call it "pick & mix". A French stick, some pate, some cold meats and cheeses, olives, some dips, some salad. All washed down with some vino whilst watching a good film. I just put it out on the table and we help ourselves.

Was talking to a friend today - she has decided to copy me and put her house on the market too.:D We are going to have some fun house-hunting, shopping together, possibly some car boots.

I wish it was OH I was doing it with, but at least I can share the fun with some of my girl friends and the boys of course.

Squid So glad to hear that you've had a bit of chat at work. Hopefully it will "clear the air" and things will improve for you.

I've been looking on Rightmove - there are some great "Batchelor Pads" I fancy. There is a really fab maisonette, originally in an old Industrial Mill, sounds a lot like yours, a nice smart area just walking distance from the city centre.

I'm definitely ear-marking that one but I mustn't get too excited and run away with myself just yet. Don't want to tempt fate.

The beauty of some of these apartments is that they do have a very generous square footage, nice large rooms. The only thing that concerns me is the maintenance charges. Still if it's only for rental for a year or so I needn't worry too much.

Definitely need a balcony ..... to sit and enjoy a drink and watch the world go by.....

The more I think of it the more a nice apartment will fit the bill because they are usually very wheel chair friendly, especially if they were built or converted post 2007 (new EU regs). I would be able to bring OH home for regular visits.

Time for a cuppa. Have a lovely evening. I think it's going to be a cold one here, clear frosty looking skies.

podperson

Hi all,

Hewie - my mum has had to have a few MRIs and she struggles with them as well as she gets very claustrophobic - she finds it helps to have headphones on and listen to some music while you're in there, also has the advantage of drowing out the noise of the machine.

LL - it's perhaps a good excuse to have a big clearout? Streamline things a bit - I know I keep meaning to go through all my stuff but it will probably take something like a move before I finally get the kick to get round to it.

evilsquid - glad you managed to have a chat with the boss, hope it helps things a bit x

ww - that's wonderful to hear how much happier and comfortable you're feeling in yourself - and go you with the date, hope it goes well

Well went to another write in for Nano this afternoon - actually managed to get some writing done at this one :rotfl:though think I was the only one there with a notepad and will need to type it all up now. It would be nice if I had a laptop - is on my 'if I ever have any spare money' list so I won't hold my breath Still nice to have a chat with other people doing it etc. Just had my tea - made veggie chilli to warm me up as it's freezing out, extra portions for the freezer for when I'll be rushing in the week. Bought my first xmas pressies online last night - really tight on money this year so just small pressies all round I think so if I get a few each time then can hopefully scrap the cash together. At least if I'm going home and OH is going to the aunt's then I won't have to buy much food wise in - got some vouchers for train tickets as well so not going to cost me too much in travel. It does seem to be creeping up fast this year - and my book will be out in less then 5 weeks :eek: eep!
Hope everyone is having a good weekend x