Wedding Tips start here...

traciemk

im getting married 12th august 2006
my budget is £2,000

VickyA_2

I'm getting married on 29th July this year. I don't know what the budget is - my parents are controlling it all and paying for everything. They've saved up since I was very little for this day, but I feel incredibly guilty. I've tried to economise on things - eg finding pieces on ebay, doing my own table plan. I was going to make my own invitations, but my parents deemed them "not suitable" because they weren't "traditional".

OH's parents' had offered to pay some money towards the whole thing, but my parents have said thanks but no thanks! It was quite embarassing to be the one to tell them that their generous offer had been knocked back.

We definitely would not have been able to afford this sort of wedding by ourselves. Unfortunately, my dad is now of the opinion that if he's paying then he can invite who he likes to it. This is really upsetting me as most of the people I wouldn't have invited myself. I tried to put my point of view across to my dad the other day, but he didn't see why I was getting upset. I know it's very generous of him to pay, but it's just not my wedding any more!

Sorry, I know I should be grateful, but I'm so stressed and upset that it's no good! OH and I joked about going to Las Vegas - now it just seems like a very good idea!

ms_london

Hi VickyA. Thanks for posting.

It does sound like a wedding from hell (sorry!!). I would rather pay for it myself than have someone else decided every single detail for me. I hope you manage to get through it ok ((big hugs)).

If/when I have children I am going to save their childs allowance in a saving account for them. So come, say 21, they will have so much money to either go towards uni fees, start them off with their first house, or go towards a wedding. Although I wont tell them about this, and will probably still charge them rent if they live at home - just so that they learn the value of money.

Rambling again, sorry!! xx

cha97michelle

I got married last October, before discovering these boards, and did things as i wanted. I kind of cringe a bit now as i know i could have done certain things cheaper, but as i didn't get into debt to do it, what the hell. I had a wonderful day, but it cost getting on for £15,000.

My parents gave us £5000, and DHs parents gave us 3, plus bought one or two extra bits.

It's so easy to spend more than you have, cos you get an idea in your head of what it will be like.

I'm feeling it a bit now that i'm pregnant as our savings took a bit of a hammering and they are only starting to look healthy again, and then i'll blow it by taking a year off work for maternity leave.

The joys of life. What price do you put on being happy and achieving what you want out of life?

Hope that satisfies your nosiness, and i like your idea of saving for the kid. With the new child trust funds, it is even easier to do this.

Michelle

Philippa36

I had quite an expensive do in a very big expensive white meringue (I didn't know any better at 19 ), church, hotel etc. My parents paid for it all.

If I marry my o/h I would make it as simple as possible ~

The amount of money spent doesn't make it any more special and I would much prefer to spend a large amount on a fantastic honeymoon and start my married life relaxed and with a few pounds left in the bank

ms_london

cha97michelle wrote:

they are only starting to look healthy again, and then i'll blow it by taking a year off work for maternity leave.The joys of life. What price do you put on being happy and achieving what you want out of life?

I see taking a year off work for maternity leave a lot more fulfilling & rewarding though, than running up that much on a wedding - so I do agree with your maternity leave idea.

I suppose when I was running up the debt I thought that I had to earn so much & have so much to be happy, but I now know that money doesnt buy you happiness, and neither does having the latest pair of shoes - or a big old wedding that makes everyone else happy but yourself. I do think that happiness comes from within, as pukey as that sounds!! ;0) Although I do appreciate how hard peer pressure is.!

Thanks for all of your replies, my nosiness has been satisfied.

xx

ms_london

Michelle - just noted your savings for your maternity leave fund - well done. Thats excellent.!! Youve done so well. I hope you have a fab year off with your baby. xx

itsarichmansworld

Went abroad had a honeymon to die for whole thign cost 3k! magic!
No debt!

MrsNurseyC

Hi hun,
We got married on the 3rd of September 2005, so have been hitched for just over 6 months Married life is great! We didn't have a budget as such, but we knew it was more important to us to enjoy married life, rather than spend years worrying about in debt, after one massive blow out day. Also, I still had a year of my nurse training to complete at that time, so I am on a reduced income.

Our strategy was to decide on the things that really mattered to us:
*I wanted to look stunning, so had the beautiful ivory dress -a bargain in the pronuptia sale, fitted like a glove!
*Negotiated at hairdressers for price of mine and bridesmaid's hair to be styled on the day
*Got veil and underskirt from ebay, and some scented tea-lights for the tables
*Made my own table decorations- hot pink organza ribbon+raffia tied around square glass vases filled with hot pink roses/gerberas- I'm pretty artistic!
*Had just the one bridesmaid (my dear sis)
*Held our reception in the function room of the little pub just up the road from my grandparents' house, so they could make it (Very important factor)
**Also received loads of planning help from my OH's mum who is an angel (and would've got on with my own mum so well) she made order of service cards, and helped write out invites (ready made but classy, funky ones) decorating the cake, planning food, music.....etc.
*My dad paid for the food at the reception (room hire n/a, as we were paying for food) which I think came to about £400 for a hot and cold buffet, drinks and deserts- there was plenty of food for 50 guests. We would have been able to save for this amount, if needed. I guess my dad's 'middle class', but not well off, so we never expected him to pay for my wedding. Also, getting married in a castle or country manor which seems the trend these days isn't really us, we have no disillusions of grandeur, us!
*In the evening we went to the races (I was adamant on no tacky mobile disco!)- sooo fitting as hubby and me met working in the bookies together, and doing something different than the usual 'samey' evening do. Received so many verbal thank you's for such an enjoyable day, and I wouldn't have changed a thing A unique, special wedding day on a budget is definitely do-able!

fiobee

ms_london wrote:

When did you get married? Are you getting married this year?

How much did you spend? What is your budget?

We're getting married on the 28th this month. We don't have a fixed budget but my parents have contributed towards it (my dad said he wanted to pay for the reception).

It is a special one-off occasion but we are only having a small family do and don't want to spend more than we can afford. Things that are one-off are very cheap eg tailor on eBay did a made-to-measure dress for under 50 quid including shipping from Hong Kong. Things that will last and can be re-used we don't mind spending more on eg shoes and kilt accessories.

I would say spend only what you can afford and think about what use you will actually get out of your purchases and whether you'd have bought them anyway. My fiancé and his brothers wear their kilts to all formal occasions (proud Scots lol) so we'd have been buying a new day jacket for him eventually anyway and a quality pair of shoes should last you a few years but a wedding dress will only be worn once. The only thing I'd say you should definitely spend money on is photography (whether it's a professional photographer or friend/family) as you will want a lasting memento of the moment - this is the advice I've had from married friends.