How to ensure a burial takes place the way I want it to

Hootie19

Sally22 wrote: »

Have you looked at the Co Op funeral plans? I havent used them as I have my own will in my safe at home but been reading through their FAQ and anyone over 18 can buy one, you can specify your wishes.

More info here

http://www.co-operative.coop/funeralcare/Funeral-Plans/content/your-questions/

Hope this helps

Thank you. But when I said I have no money - I literally mean that. I can't afford to make that kind of provision, unfortunately.

Hootie19

Mojisola wrote: »

If your husband dies before you, won't you own the house?

I think I would sell the ring and buy a funeral plan as well. My parents bought plans with AgeUK and we were very pleased with how everything was handled when my Mum died earlier this year.

If you do write a homemade will but don't want your family (even your husband?) to have any involvement with it, then I would store it safely - https://www.justice.gov.uk/courts/probate/depositing-documents-for-safe-keeping

If a will is left at home and is found by someone who doesn't agree with the contents, it's very easy for the will to be destroyed.

Thank you.

As I said above, the ring won't sell for it's insurance valuation, so there won't be enough money for a plan. And as I said to Sally22, I really do literally have no money, so can't buy a plan with anyone.

Thank you for the direct.gov link - I will have a look at that.

Hootie19

McKneff wrote: »

You can buy a Will form at any Post Office or WH Smith. But follow it to the letter or it will be invalid.

Your ring forms part of your estate. Funeral costs have to be paid from your estate.

If you have assets, ie house, car, expensive ring, these will all be taken into account for any debt after you die.

Thank you

So my half of the house would go to my husband - could he be forced to sell the house so that my half of the proceeds would form part of my estate, and then used to pay for my funeral?

Hootie19

Dunroamin wrote: »

Unless you're paying for it yourself, I don't think that you can insist on a burial, which would be far more expensive than a cremation.

Thank you

sorry, I chose the wrong words. My intention is for my, and my mother's ashes to be placed in my father's grave (I own the plot).

McKneff

You may have no money, but you do have assets, half a house and a ring.

Hootie19

Tish_P wrote: »

If you feel that strongly about the ring, donate it to a charity whose aims you support, either while you're still alive or making use of the free Will writing schemes many charities offer in exchange for a bequest.

"Taking it with you" is a bit petty, as well as being wasteful. Anything beautiful and valuable should be out in the world doing good and being appreciated.

A bit petty, maybe. But I don't want anyone else having my mother's ring. I cannot put into words why, but I just don't.

Hootie19

McKneff wrote: »

You may have no money, but you do have assets, half a house and a ring.

Yes. But even if the ring is sold, it won't meet the costs of even a basic funeral. So would my husband be forced to sell the house, to release my half of the proceeds to my estate, to then be used to pay for the funeral costs?

Marisco

Hootie19 wrote: »

A bit petty, maybe. But I don't want anyone else having my mother's ring. I cannot put into words why, but I just don't.

But how are you going to stop this happening though? When my mam died and was in the coffin, I was asked ( before the lid was closed) if I wanted her rings, her wedding, engagement and her mams' wedding ring, I said yes. If your husband or kids are asked, I'm sure they'll say the same!!

As for the house, get a free half hour with a solicitor and ask. I wouldn't have thought a family home has to be sold to pay for a funeral!! But if I was that worried about it, I'd flog the ring, and even if you only get 1000k for it, it's something to "put down" against costs. You can get a funeral here starting at £1500.

Nicki

If you have no will and your estate is small, it will go to your husband when you die, after all your debts and funeral expenses have been paid. As others have said, your mother's ring will be part of your estate. Your share of the house depends on how it is owned legally. If you own it as "joint tenants", then when you die your husband automatically owns the whole thing, and it doesn't get used to pay your debts. If it is owned as "tenants in common", then the value of your share forms part of the estate, and your debts and funeral expenses are paid from it.

Usually the liability for paying funeral costs rests with the person who makes the arrangements for the funeral, albeit, that person can set it against the deceased's estate for tax purposes (but if the estate isn't big enough, the funeral costs still need to be paid). I can't off the top of my head think of any way in which you can force someone to pay for a particular kind of funeral for you after you are dead, and as others have said, I think the only way to do this is probably to buy a funeral plan. However, the people who will definitely know the answer to this, will be funeral directors themselves, so I suppose you could approach them now, and ask them for their advice and whether it is possible for you to arrange your own funeral now whilst still alive, to be paid for out of your estate when you die. Hope this helps and that the question is not because the situation is imminent, but just one of academic interest, and that you personal circumstances will change before you get to that point.

Fire_Fox

Hootie19 wrote: »

Thank you

So my half of the house would go to my husband - could he be forced to sell the house so that my half of the proceeds would form part of my estate, and then used to pay for my funeral?

This partly depends how your wills are written! Your family will not get the ring if you bequeath it to someone else or to a charity. Your husband should organise a funeral that costs whatever he can muster in selling your car and ring and so on, he shouldn't be organising a funeral that he cannot pay for. If he doesn't pay the bill the funeral directors will likely take him to court.

I think it's sad you don't have any friends, maybe address this by joining organisations for lonely or older people? There are many that offer things like free get togethers and free days out. Also you say you have no money, but you are a member of MSE. Are you claiming all the benefits you are eligible for, are you on a debt management plan if you have debts? Do you really need to run a car or could you use public transport, home delivery for groceries, the occasional taxi? Then you could start a payment or savings plan for your funeral if you want it a certain way.