Neighbours and their kids

Fire_Fox

1940sGal wrote: »

I have some, but most are good natured and we get on fine.



How would you feel if someone made an allegation of this sort against you? This is what I'm getting at. Is the OP assuming that the sounds he hears are those of an abusive father based on the way he behaved toward his wife? I've seen nothing here to suggest that the father is beating his children in an unacceptable way. For all the OP knows he could merely be hearing a smack round the backside and the kids screaming as a result.

I'm just wanting to give the father the benefit of the doubt, that's all. Bad behaviour toward his wife does not automatically equal bad behaviour toward his children.

I know the OP heard one child asking another why their father smacked them, but as i stated that could mean anything.

All i'm saying is that I wouldn't like to have been accused of child abuse based on what someone heard. The OP has not stated whether he has or has not ever seen physical evidence of abuse on the children.

I'm not stupid, I know what you have been getting at. Like anyone I would be shocked if someone reported concerns about my cat - but I have nothing to hide, my cat is physically healthy and well adjusted. I would rather someone reported me erroneously than didn't report a child or animal that who were being abused or the parents/ owners that were not coping. Even if the OP was able to undress the children to find physical evidence he could not be sure that was not due to 'falling down the stairs', 'walking into a door' or a genuine childhood accident.

You are assuming that the NSPCC or Social Services will go steaming in saying there has been an allegation of abuse and putting the kids on the 'at risk' register. I hope the OP has told them what he told us here: this family has THREE autistic children. You keep saying who is to know, obviously the answer is those who are experienced in dealing with parents who are not coping and need support - the NSPCC or Social Services.

"Studies of child abuse allegations suggest that the overall rate of false accusation is under 10%, as approximated based on multiple studies.[1][7][8][9] Of the allegations determined to be false, only a small portion originated with the child, the studies showed; most false allegations originated with an adult bringing the accusations on behalf of a child, and of those, a large majority occurred in the context of divorce and child-custody battles."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/False_accusations

Benefit of the doubt has left children being tortured or killed in the past. I won't post links to news reports to prove a point because they are truly harrowing. Neighbours and relatives had suspicions but in many cases the alarm was finally raised by a complete stranger.