I just don't know what to do. I am so depressed. I need to get this out.

gravitytolls

millyaulait wrote: »

I know it's silly but I really feel like I can't go to a doctor. I feel so awful I don't think I'm going to be able to get out of bed tomorrow. I feel so pathetic.

I don't know about Samaritans, I think I would only just be able to sob over the phone to them. Sorry for blowing your suggestions away, I do appreciate your help

Those of us who have and do suffer from depression, completely understand. I need meds all the time, but almost every year I convince myself I don't and stop. It's often months before I go back to the Doc and by then I'm filled with anxiety about every little thing, weeping, not sleeping etc.

But, you need to ask yourself what you want. Is it really to not be here? I don't think so. You know you need the Dr, you know you're going to be advised to see your Dr, and here's one more poster advising just that.

The trouble with depression is it is very isolating. You can't see it, you can't really explain it to others, you just know you feel so utterly dreadful, you feel you can't face another day.

But you can, and you can start tomorrow, by picking up the phone. If you balk at the phone or worry you'll not keep the appointment, just get down there. Speak to the receptionist and tell her you need to see a Dr urgently. She will ask what the problem is, you can tell her, she will not be ouraged or astounded, she will get you the help you need.

Medication is not a miracle cure, it takes several weeks to get into your system, and several more for your system to acclimatise itself, and for you to go from misery to anaestesia to something bordering on normality.

There is light at the end of this tunnel, but you gotta get moving through it to see it.

As for the B/F. Well, unless you've suffered with it, it's hard to understand it, and he probably thinks you feel a bit down and are probably over reacting ~ you know the way men do when they have a cold.

If there are support groups in your area, search them out, far better to be talking to those who understand as they can truly give support.

faerie~spangles

Milly, call the Samaritans: 08457 90 90 90, Sweety they are well trained and will stay on the phone even if you can't talk because you're sobbing.

I'll be checking into this thread for the next few hours.

Blackpool_Saver

Hi, I understand the feeling too low to face the drs surgery for sure, it all piles up, phone the helplines and stay with us ((hugs))

Bennifred

Milly - I've been where you are now. You don't have to feel like this.
Let the doctor help - it's what they are there for. They WANT to help you. Don't be afraid or embarrassed about crying. The relief you will feel just telling them will be fantastic.
Is there a friend who could take you there, if you are finding it difficult to go alone?
I remember sitting in my car outside the doctor's sobbing because I couldn't bring myself to go in even though I knew I really needed to. I managed to ring a friend (howling!) and asked for help - she came and walked me in. It was the start of recovering.

You WILL feel better - I know it doesn't feel as though that will ever happen, right now, but I promise you will. P lease take just one step and ask for the help you need. You can do it.

faerie~spangles

Milly, I'm checking in.

belfastgirl23

Some great advice here. Just to add, the worst thing about feeling like this is that you think you're the only person with this problem and that no one will understand. Alas as you have seen, this is something many people experience and recover from. Don't be afraid to seek help. You've already taken the first step by posting here

busiscoming2

Milly, I have not suffered like many of the posters here, but have helped my friend through a bout of deep depression. I know she said that having someone to talk to made a difference.

You have some like minded people here willing you on and I too am hoping you will take the next step and contact the Samaritans or your GP.

Things may seem bad and all consuming, but remember they can only get better.

fionamay41

Milly
Let us know how you are today, no rush when you're ready.
Thinking of you

amyloofoo

:grouphug: I hope you managed to give the samaritans a call / email and it brought some peace - please let us know how you're doing today Milly

millyaulait

Hi, everyone.

Thank you SO MUCH to everyone that replied.

I appreciate every single reply so, so much. It amazes me that complete strangers come together and help each other. You are all really wonderful people & I thank you.

I didn't manage to call the samaritans, I wanted to but I just kept sobbing at the thought of it so I took myself to bed and just tried to sleep.

Thankfully my cat was tired too and he just cuddled up next to me with his little purr & it made me feel a little less lonely. Sometimes it really is the little things that make a difference when you're so low. It's not like a cat can talk you down or make you feel horrible like some people do.

I still feel awful today, I can feel myself constantly welling up, but I feel like there is now definitely help out there, and that I'm not really alone thanks to all of your replies.

I think I am going to brave up and go see my GP, probably tomorrow if I can get an appointment. Surely if I have hit rock bottom then there is nothing to lose by going to see them, I can only gain from doing this.

And again - THANK YOU ALL because you potentially just saved my life. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have anyone to talk to, or just a place to let it all out for a night. xxxxxxxxxx