Preparedness for when

VJsmum

Evening all, interesting debates as ever.

So, I am a quantity surveyor by trade, typically 10% of whom are women and so have long been a woman in a "man's" world. Always interesting when we have work done on the house, I ask the questions, builder tells OH the answer, who then looks at me for affirmation. OH doesn't have a clue about building, but will often be heard repeating something I've said with a knowing tone in his voice.

I am also a teacher of said discipline and we have students of all ethnicities but only once have I had bother, which was when I called a black guy out for calling a white guy the "N" word :eek: I said "I won't have that word in my class, not to you or from you". He came to me afterwards (late at night, dark and I was the only one in the office :eek:) and apologised and me and him got on like a house on fire after that - even when he came back after being in prison :cool: I do wonder whether education is the thing that makes the difference as I have had Moslems, Sikhs and so forth and none have ever treated me (or female students or colleagues) any worse than they would a male lecturer.

But I am also in the early stages of research for a PhD on women in construction and, my dears, my already curly hair is positively frazzled at some of the stuff I am reading (from statements like "women can undertake virtually any job in construction" to women saying that male colleagues had undone their bras when minding their own business at the photo copier).

Hegemonic masculinity means we are a long way from equality....

GreyQueen

Hard_Up_Hester wrote: »

I grew up in the '50's so remember what it was like.
Ten years ago when I was buying a 2nd hand car many of the salesmen would talk to hubby, he doesn't bloody drive!
Twenty years ago I was running my own IT business, I was regularly asked 'Is there a man I can speak to, I have a technical question'. My reply varied depending on my mood, but often said 'I'll go and call Steve in to take your call, he's the gardener and knows bu&&er all about IT, but he has a !!!! if that helps!'
GQ, your pharmacy sounds like mine, it can take 2 or 3 visits to collect my script, is it a Lloyds pharmacy?

:eek: Yes! Don't say they do this everywhere, I though my lot were uniquely inefficient. Charming, but inefficient. My folks are with another Lloyds pharmacy in the hometown and they don't have this grief (in their case its their GP screwing up their meds by rewriting their prescriptions on the sly).

mardatha

I can see the sense of a lot of this though - married women tended to get pregnant and leave work, and there was no materlity leave or pay then.
GQ - I would never be without a HWB, far better than these daft heating pads, I don't like them.
I eloped at 16 and asked the gp for the pill, he wanted me to bring my mother with me before he's give me it! So I went to the family planning clinic and got it there instead.
I'm not keen on them in a herd lol - but one thing I like about wimmen is that they do tend to speak out more about injustice and skulduggery than men do. If you look at the govt its usually women who say what they think and the men cover it all in doublespeak. (which ends up the wimmen get sacked and them get promotion but that's by the by)..

NewShadow

VJsmum wrote: »

... to women saying that male colleagues had undone their bras when minding their own business at the photo copier).

*Snigger*

There were two blokes I knew at university who had mastered the trick of undoing a bra with one hand.

They used to compete to see how many each could undo, in public, on a single day (or night)in the union bar.

Their excuse... well, they were 18, and I guess their frontal lobe hadn't quite developed yet.

A group of us conspired to wear front clasping or no bras one day and stand around where they usually 'played'.

While one was getting frustrated trying to 'subtly' find the clasp, two of us came up behind one of them and yanked his pants down, while a third took a picture.

Said picture was the front cover of the student rag the next month with the caption: 'Chauvinism 0 Collaboration 1'

ivyleaf

GreyQueen wrote: »

:eek: Yes! Don't say they do this everywhere, I though my lot were uniquely inefficient. Charming, but inefficient. My folks are with another Lloyds pharmacy in the hometown and they don't have this grief (in their case its their GP screwing up their meds by rewriting their prescriptions on the sly).

Ours is the same! (Not always, but often.) I now use a small independent pharmacy, where they can fill my prescription in about 5 minutes while I wait. Sometimes they need to order something in, but when I go back the next day it's always ready.

ETA NewShadow That's brilliant :T :beer:

VJsmum

I think there's a difference between a bit of fun amongst college students and activities in the workplace to make women feel inferior (and they did feel harassed), particularly work places where men are dominant anyway...

Add to that comments like "who did you have to sleep with to get that promotion /car / desk". I have to admit, I never had any bother on building sites, could quite happily chat and work with the labourers, brickies, secretary, other professionals and clients. But I did have some harassment from my boss at one point and it was nasty....

[Deleted User]

I think equality is a two way thing, I'll hold open a door for a man and give up my seat on the bus if a man needs it, I did the other day for an older than me chap who was distinctly wobbly on his legs and needed a stick to walk I don't expect a man to hold open a door for me but they sometimes do and I don't expect to be offered a bus seat just because I'm female, some folks do. What I find really bad mannered from both sexes is not saying thank you for courtesy, that applies to young and old and if I've stepped into a gap to let someone pass who would otherwise have had to step out into the road and they don't acknowledge, just a smile or a nod will do, I'm furious. I expect to be allowed to be equal in all areas that I CAN be equal in without question or comment but I'm not stupid enough to expect it where I can't. In some areas I'm the one who knows what's what and I will be the one talked to regardless of being female and in some He Who Knows is way more knowledgeable and takes the lead, it's life!

Living_proof

MrsLurcherwalker wrote: »

What I find really bad mannered from both sexes is not saying thank you for courtesy, that applies to young and old and if I've stepped into a gap to let someone pass who would otherwise have had to step out into the road and they don't acknowledge, just a smile or a nod will do, I'm furious.

Elderly women are the worst offenders, in my experience. If I open a door for them they sail through with their nose in the air, without as much as acknowledgement. I am now of a sufficiently mature age to be able to say "how very rude!" in future.

S_Wales_Saver

GQ. Good luck with Shoes. I spent yesterday morning filling a script for a common children's antibiotic. Two small local B**ts didn't have it in stock. The second rang the town centre branch to check availability. They had it so I duly rode in on the bus. They even managed to dispense it in under an hour :eek: only just though

On the other hand, our local Lloyds is far more efficient (but as it's small was closed yesterday)

So nice to see that you all read some of the authors I love. Kelley Armstrong is a favourite with Christine Feehan, Sherrilyn Kenyon and J R Ward. Always meant to read Jim Butcher as well. I thought you all stuck to Terry Pratchett whom I don't like at all.

Doveling

Just seen this

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-35786378

Hope you folks in Derbyshire have full kettles!