A bit of a vent :(

I_wanna_live_for_free

Please don't take this the wrong way but this soul-searching on here may go against you IF your ex or any of the friends he's spoken with knows your id. If I were you I would get your best mates round and have a girly catchup (dvd, wine & choc) and vent about this in private.

Nothing online as this is something that could bite you in the bum in future. You're hurting right now and so you may put something that you could regret.

On the upside you have seen his true colours, luckily before you committed to him. It's his loss and most people will see him for the prat he's been. And if they don't - their judgement is flawed anyway.

Thinking of you x

londonsurrey

You were gullible, and wanting to believe in the romantic dream.

Many of us were once young women who also made that mistake.

The upside is that you didn't waste 20 years on him, and now you're better equipped to spot such losers, and one day you'll be the one telling a young lady "Meh, he's such a substandard model, forget about him. Let me introduce you to my friend, an ex-fireman who is now a published author and patron of a wildlife charity".

itzmee

bethanyg wrote: »

we were saving for our first flat

Might sound obvious but just make sure he doesn't have access to your savings and can't clear you out.

bethanyg_2

I_wanna_live_for_free wrote: »

Please don't take this the wrong way but this soul-searching on here may go against you IF your ex or any of the friends he's spoken with knows your id. If I were you I would get your best mates round and have a girly catchup (dvd, wine & choc) and vent about this in private.

Nothing online as this is something that could bite you in the bum in future. You're hurting right now and so you may put something that you could regret.

On the upside you have seen his true colours, luckily before you committed to him. It's his loss and most people will see him for the prat he's been. And if they don't - their judgement is flawed anyway.

Thinking of you x

He doesn't know I come on here, and they're all too wrapped up in pretending they're still 16 to bother looking for things like this.

bethanyg_2

itzmee wrote: »

Might sound obvious but just make sure he doesn't have access to your savings and can't clear you out.

He DEFINITELY doesn't!

I_wanna_live_for_free

bethanyg wrote: »

He DEFINITELY doesn't!

Wise girl

Amber_Sunshine

What he´s doing by slagging you off is trying to undermine your credibility. People who know they are in the wrong do this as they think that getting in first makes what they say look more plausible. Then when you try to defend yourself, their negative message may already have sunk in. It´s a preemptive strike.

bethanyg_2

I'm just not sure what I've done to deserve all this anymore

Mrs.W_2

bethanyg wrote: »

I'm just not sure what I've done to deserve all this anymore

You've done nothing, poppet! He's just going through self-justification. The poor, sad little boy.

Now please carry on being way out of his league.

bellevie

Itl get easier with time. You will look back soon and just think what a plonker!

I left home at 16, Im 29 now, and although I have lived with my ex, I like it soooo much better on my own, though I do remember having the same fears in my early 20's, even got my dog to make me feel safer.....How I thought a cavalier king charles spaniel would protect me I dont know:rotfl:

Itl all be yesterdays news soon, just keep your chin up. People will start to notice he is !!!!!ing whilst you are keeping a dignified silence. It will annoy him too if you dont react x